Time to have the power that I never had and beyond. And not be a slave.
Do not ever relapse brother.
You got this…
Definitely man. As long as you got the fighting spirit to keep going and the vision to keep going with a positive attitude then you can win.
Right now I had fear to go and take my clothes off in front of all the gym guys at the gym where i shower at because of my anxiety but I told myself I won’t be fearful but fearless and just went into alpha mode and took it off like if it was nothing. I didn’t care if they were looking etc…
Also I worked out with the amount I can handle not trying to show off to others, but just being myself. Last time i was all about showing off, this time I do what I can.
Kind of funny though that I was scared of taking off my clothes, now that I think about it lol. .
Be fearless man.
Feel more confident in myself and unashamed. I have alot to do today. I will exercise in the gym after work and maybe if I have time read a book or listen to positive messages. In general I have more energy than I had before. No urges unlike last time. I don’t feel like relapsing. Instead I think its a waste of time. I can have a real GF instead. Haha.
Feeling much more in control of myself. I am starting to feel how beautiful it is to have a woman by your side unlike just looking at porn. Whenever I see a woman I feel like I just honor her and I feel the beauty in them. My body wants a girlfriend lol. .
I am having urges sometimes but not so much like last time. Now not so much. I can feel my inner energy. I am trying to eat foods that giving me energy and that can feed my muscles in the gym when i workout. 2 more days to go until i accomplish my #2 goal.
My second goal has been accomplished and I want to take a moment to reflect. Alot has changed once I hit day 12 already and now I am in day 14. Finally. There is no going back this time but only forward is the direction. Never looking back. Although the days that followed I had so many urges and sometimes I couldn’t contain my damn penis from feeling aroused. I kept on going always. With the mindset of winning and being the happiest man alive in the end of it all. To win is to sacrifice something.
Anyways lets talk about today. Today I felt a big urge to relapse. Everytime i see a woman I feel like I want to have sex with them. I feel so horny. Lol. So yeah. No wet dreams yet but I feel the energy inside me alot. I use it for work instead it calms me down when I use the energy for work.
I dream more vividly in general and communicate well with people. I am still a little shy toward people but i feel much more confident to talk to people now compared to back then. Time to conquer all the destructive forces that drive me down.
I had a big urge to relapse. I had a fantasy sexual dream a little. No wet dream though which is good. Even when you sleep in car you can feel the urge. Just let it be and move on. I woke up early today and went and did some exercise. To be honest I’ve been feeling so horny ever since day 15. Lol.
How it feels in day 19 when your so close to your goal.
The urges are too much. !!
FINALLY MADE IT TO DAY 21!!!
Today I woke up at 7 a.m. to be honest it was tough holding on for that long. My longest streak was actually 24 days and I remember I failed miserably that time. But no more. I want to go all out this time.
I do feel a difference in my life little by little each day passes. I don’t care what people think that’s for one, secondly I want to have a real relationship and I noticed that if I was going to get another GF I need to stay committed this time and keep her.
I am so close to my financial goals as well, just a little bit more. So close to pass my highest streak. . To God be the Glory in staying pure from destruction.
I am miserable. I relapsed 1 day ago. But for some reason I don’t want to give up. I feel I could have done better indeed. I will push through whatever circumstance comes in my way. Big or small. Amen.
Reaching to the top again.! .
No matter what happens or what negative things come your way. Always keep moving forward. This time i must, i will, I can do better. No matter what comes my way, i will overcome everything. Those that put me down won’t be joking for long. .
THIS IS MY COMEBACK, GIVING EVERYTHING IVE GOT INSIDE. TO FIGHT FOR THE DREAM, FOR WHAT IS RIGHTEOUS, FOR THE HEAVENLY KINGDOM AND FOR MY FAMILY. YOU WERE THE ONLY ONE WHO COULD HAVE STOPPED THE BREAK UP YOU HAD WITH GIRLFRIEND. BUT YOUR ADDICTION TOOK OVER! YOU WERE THE ONLY ONE WHO COULD HAVE CONTROLLED THEIR SPENDING AND NOT RUN INTO DEBT! BUT YOUR ADDICTION KEPT YOU IN PRISON .
GUESS WHAT? BRING IT ON THEN. I WILL BECOME AND I MUST BECOME MY ENEMIES WORSE NIGHTMARE. THROUGH FIRE, THE VALLEY OF DEATH, THROUGH JESUS. I CAN OVERCOME. AMEN.
A new beginning. All things start new. I hit a big streak and fell down. I will rise again. Goals to accomplish this year won’t be sitting and waiting anymore. Woke up well today. Going to eat well and read a book. Go to work and later workout. Praise Jesus in all things you do. AMEN.
Going all out. No urges whatsoever, I feel more motivated now than ever. I will overcome through whatever trial comes my way.