PrDr's diary- The road to defeat the self

Journal
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yessss I so much agreee with this bro, somehow we just have to cope up with what is going on in the world

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Tbh bro, I think 99% is a bit exaggerated for India atm LOL, but yes you are right. Nothing holds any meaning anymore, besides superficiality. Once Iā€™m done fulfilling my responsibilities, Iā€™ll die a very content and happy man. So happy and content that I donā€™t need this shit in my life to be fulfilled.

Its easy bro. Detachment and indifference. Make your world smaller and be secure. You are a prime example of this right now. :sweat_smile:

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I agree and I am really thankful for this, but Iā€™ve got to know about a different kind of world, that I didnā€™t know much of, because of the experiences the person that means the world to me has had in the past, thatā€™s why I am able to think in this direction as well.

if not 99 then 90 for sure, you might not know the extent of what is going on in cities now a days, and yeah I am talking about Indian cities, casual dating, situationships and all have become new normal.

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That is so heart-wrenching, man. Your world did not deserve it. But Iā€™m glad youā€™ve found each other now. Hopefully you stick with each other forever now.

Maybe 99 for big metro cities. For the kind of city I live in, Iā€™d say 75-80, and that too because of the very high number of college students. Our youth, our countrymen are learning bad sides of western culture much quicker than good sides. Maybe because it makes them appear ā€œcoolā€. Noone is serious anymore, and if one shows their seriousness or talk about long term problems that may arise, then they are nothing but objects of mockery for their peers. Later, when the reality sets in (though I donā€™t think it even happens to more than 5% of these people), they begin searching for what they have lost. My classmates from school enrolled in medical college met me last year and the way they were bragging about their experiences, I felt like we definitely live in 2 different worlds LOL, and also if one gender is really that stupid to fall for labels, money, cars, jewellery, narcotics, clubbing, shopping etc, to ruin their lives for it. But its ok. Not my concern anymore.

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No bro everyone has their share of things they are supposed to see based on their past karma, and now I feel that no one else other than a person like me couldā€™ve handled her the way she needed and deserved to be handled and that may be her good deeds that she found me, and I am also happy now, if there are 5-10 negative aspects then there are 90-95 positives as well, and those negatives as well are turning into positives only as we are growing together.

yes bro thanks.

Yes bro, I hope the same.

Agreed.

Yes these all but I guess the more they get attracted to is the kind of care people show in the beginning and many put a false mask of that care which innocent people canā€™t understand.

I also met my classmates recently and since weā€™ve all grown in village kinda environment and our school taught us nice morals, I felt really good after listening to a few of them, still there were people who were running from one person to another without care but there were people who are like me, so yeah in small areas towns villages the culture hasnā€™t become that bad as is in the cities, I hope no innocent soul has to face the shackles of that culture, which is kind of a stupid wish as per todayā€™s scenario but I still wish it.

Lol good for you :joy:

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Thats true man. And I was talking about the world that both of you have right now. I mean the things she went through, she did not deserve it, because Iā€™m assuming that she was too naieve and innocent back then when she had to suffer so much. And so glad that she finally found you.

Maybe for some, but as for what I see, many are fine with that. Like I said, most people are never really serious, so they just look for whatever they can have quickly. Itā€™d be an obvious red flag if one only says things that make you feel good and comfortable. An Indian whether male or female would consider a lot of things from parents, community, religion, caste, family to money and stable future. If people donā€™t want to talk about such things and only listen goodie-goodie, wearing hoodie-woodie, its only their fault.

Same man, that was why I was surprised when I saw those guys talking that way. We came from similar backgrounds, similar upbringing and schooling, yet they seem so distant now. I donā€™t know if its medical school or something else, because most of them are studying in cities which are less developed than mine.

Its not their fault really. These things are being promoted as something good by our media industry. Most parents in smaller towns and villages still value modesty, honesty, devotion and decency as jewels. Same cannot be said about most parents in big cities.

Yeah bro LOL, I can laugh on it and talk without being affected. I remember when I used to get so angry over it LOL. That was a long time ago but still it makes me laugh when I think about it.

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ohhhhh ok got it, thanks bro :people_hugging:.

You are assuming correctly. I am also almost similarly naive, the way I have fallen for people without thinking anything, any such thing couldā€™ve happened to me as well, thankfully it didnā€™t :sweat_smile:.

:pray::pray:

Yeah I agree but many people are also making false promises now a days just to have things quickly without thinking about other personā€™s feelings and again I would say innocent people can do nothing in such scenarios.

ohh, maybe their schools and colleges are promoting that culture.

Thatā€™s also true though. People are being brainwashed into thinking what is right.
And no one can blame such people as well, but it can be treated as OK only until both people involved have same mindset and both are casual.

Ohhhh good point.

Anyway thatā€™s a lot of focus weā€™ve made on the negative side of the society, letā€™s not stretch this topic anymore, weā€™re good people, lets think and talk positively about us, about how good we are compared to 99% :rofl::rofl:

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Yeah bro, we are in top 1% . :wink:

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Yeah that was the purpose behind me writing that :joy:

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24th October, 2024
Since the injury, I have let weakness take over my mind. I do not like the way I am working, studying, looking and passing my day in general. Technically, there are no signs of injury at all, but Iā€™m holding back mentally, thinking like ā€œOh, I must take a break or Iā€™ll tire myself outā€, ā€œOh, I must sleep more or Iā€™ll be sleep deprivedā€ , ā€œOh, I must not workout hard or lift weights or thr injury will open up againā€ LOL. So lame. So, so lame. Thats not me. I have been a man who despite facing the world of challenges has never given up, stood resilient and fought back. I have been the man who kept fighting alone when most others would have given up. I have been a man who has served as an inspiration to so many people despite not being technically successful yet. This weak guy, this distracted person, this procrastinator, this idiot, this is not me. I am me, the man, the hero, the creator of my destiny, the hardest worker in the room.

So, I have set a few targets for next 3 months. Before 2025, I will:

  1. Crack the exam and get the job.
  2. Stay PMO free, not even thinking about negativities. Become a positive person.
  3. Transform physically. Get in the best shape of my life, and reach my peak in every area, strength, endurance, stamina, looks, everything.

I will check in once in a while here to give updates.

Screenshot_20241024-223847
Screenshot_20241024-223847715Ɨ477 19.6 KB

Currently at around 12 days, by the end of October, Iā€™ll be at 19, by November 49 and by December 80. Thats not a bad streak to start 2025 with.

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Yes bro youā€™ve already made it before. Youā€™re a master in this letā€™s enter 2025 with a new version of yourself :fire:

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Thanks brother. Iā€™m determined to transform my life completely now. 2024 was the last year when I failed at anything.

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26th October
Today was a day without any productivity. Except for reading the newspaper, and showering, I did not do anything. Was getting massive cravings throughout the day. Went to chatgpt, gave it the name of girl I love and aske d it to talk to me like her LOL. Atleast I got replies there and wasnā€™t blocked lol. I did that to take my mind off negativities, distract myself from cravings and even laugh on things which have been sensitive to me so far LOL. Then I just switched on the TV and spent entire day watching old horror shows from my childhood and some even before my birth. They used to make much better contemt back then, much gripping stories, realistic acting, no cheep horror tricks and makeups. It makes me wonder if people were really just more intelligent back then. But never mind. At the end of the day, I trimmed some beard on my neck giving it a finished look for the first time. My beard is getting really fuller and I wonder how is it happening right now. I always kept clean shave because of my patchy beard growth but since Iā€™ve been staying at home I donā€™t really get a haircut or shave till an exam is not around or my parents donā€™t push me LOL. Nevermind. Life is beautiful. I have decided to take 7 days challenge, during which I have to do 5 things-

  1. No screen
  2. No fap
  3. Stay Busy with work
  4. No overthinking
  5. Mindfulness
    I hope Iā€™ll be able to succeed at the challenge.
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fxk :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

sshhh koi hai, aap beeti, aahat, vikral gabral

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Bass ye LOL. Bhai 1995 wala ahat dekho, maza aa jayega, har episode me bhoot bhi nahi rehta but behtareen kahaniyan aur acting rehti hai. Me to uss time iss sansar me nahi tha to pehli bar dekhne me aur maza ata hai. AAp beeti ekadh episode dekh k bhooton pe daya ane lagi to nahi dekha lol. Baki sshhh koi hai, vikral gabral, fear files, lal ishq, brahma rakshas, nagin, kavach :face_vomiting: .

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31st October: KILLING THE MONSTER - All Out

Task Benefits Status
Avoid Deliberate Distractions Control over thoughts and actionsā€”Virtual/Real/Imagination
Get Out of the Room (if not studying) No lying on bed (except for sleep)
Get Out of Home at Least Once Sun, fresh air, physical activity, skin health
Shower and Skincare (min. moisturizer) Energy boost, kickstart the day
Exercise Energy increase, build strength
Meditation Mental health and resilience
Morning Miracle Routine Successful life = successful years = successful days = successful mornings

Progressive Steps

Time Period 1 Time Period 2 Extra Tasks Status
04-11 (5) 5-10(4) 10
11-04 (4) 12-03 (2) 12
Progress out of 9 Progress out of 8 Extra (+/-)
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31st October

31st October: KILLING THE MONSTER - All Out

Task Benefits Status
Avoid Deliberate Distractions Control over thoughts and actionsā€”Virtual/Real/Imagination
Get Out of the Room (if not studying) No lying on bed (except for sleep)
Get Out of Home at Least Once Sun, fresh air, physical activity, skin health
Shower and Skincare (min. moisturizer) Energy boost, kickstart the day
Exercise Energy increase, build strength
Meditation Mental health and resilience
Morning Miracle Routine Successful life = successful years = successful days = successful mornings

Progressive Steps

Time Period 1 Time Period 2 Extra Tasks Status
04-11 (5) 5-10(4) 10
11-04 (4) 12-03 (2) 12
Progress out of 9- 2/9 Progress out of 8- 7/8 Extra (+/-) 00
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166

)1st November: KILLING THE MONSTER - All Out

Task Benefits Status
Avoid Deliberate Distractions Control over thoughts and actionsā€”Virtual/Real/Imagination
Get Out of the Room (if not studying) No lying on bed (except for sleep)
Get Out of Home at Least Once Sun, fresh air, physical activity, skin health
Shower and Skincare (min. moisturizer) Energy boost, kickstart the day
Exercise Energy increase, build strength
Meditation Mental health and resilience
Morning Miracle Routine Successful life = successful years = successful days = successful mornings

Progressive Steps

Time Period 1 Time Period 2 Extra Tasks Status
04-11 (5) 5-10(4) 10
11-04 (4) 12-03 (2) 12
Progress out of 9 - 5/9 Progress out of 8- 7.5/8 Extra (+/-) 12.5/17
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167

02nd November: KILLING THE MONSTER - All Out

Task Benefits Status
Avoid Deliberate Distractions Control over thoughts and actionsā€”Virtual/Real/Imagination
Get Out of the Room (if not studying) No lying on bed (except for sleep)
Get Out of Home at Least Once Sun, fresh air, physical activity, skin health
Shower and Skincare (min. moisturizer) Energy boost, kickstart the day
Exercise Energy increase, build strength
Meditation Mental health and resilience
Morning Miracle Routine Successful life = successful years = successful days = successful mornings

Progressive Steps

Time Period 1 Time Period 2 Extra Tasks Status
04-11 (5) 5-10(4) 10
11-04 (4) 12-03 (2) 12
Progress out of 9 - 8/9 Progress out of 8- 8/8 Extra (+/-) 16/17
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