Jared.C🤙 [[My Journey of Self Improvement]]

I uninstalled snapchat for this reason. Broke close to 70+ streaks with people and some well over 1150-200+ days but I posted a final screenshot saying I was deleting the app anyways, and that keeps me accountable lol. I never regret that decision. Willpower is a limited resource, use it wisely.

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I installed it once, found the discover page stupid and uninstalled in 2 days, never went there again :joy:

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I never go on the discover page, I only go there to send my family photos

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Day 0

So here I am starting again, I am going to keep going no matter what and keep up the grind, I’m not going to let myself get bored and I’m going to learn to embrace the urge instead of trying to get rid of it, ive fallen badly today but I’m to get back up.

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Day 1

Did alot today, mowed my parents lawns, prune branches and sprayed some areas in the backyard, it was a good day and a way for me to get back on track.

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Day 7

Been busy with gym and work like usual, been getting alot of anxiety the past few days, and am suffering from low dopamine but I’m staying consistent and keeping my head up, because this is the withdrawal phase and that’s the hardest bit to get and the worst place to be, but I’m not giving up, I’m continuing to stay strong. The gym and my work are the only things keeping me going right now, I’m continuing to take cold showers and be naked which help too, I’m also trying to start practicing meditation again.

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last night I relapsed, so here I am starting again, I will take a few days to focus on myself, my mental health comes first.

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So I have relapsed again, this relapse has really hit me this time, ive realized how lost I’ve become, it feels like no matter how hard I try its as if I’m not trying hard enough, looking back at last year when I nearly went 6 months on nofap, there were things I was doing that allowed me to go this far on nofap, especially during the first 30 to 90 days, starting from that relapse from last year, I decided to sit down and find strategies to prevent relapsing, and went as far as uninstalling all my social, even the important ones, except for YouTube, because I knew having social media there was not going to help me especially in this state, so I took a few weeks off and started sorting myself out, in the first few days I was on YouTube researching nofap and motivational videos that had an impact on me for the next few months, this information stuck in my head and helped me form a new mindset, all of the worries had disappeared, I was barely using my phone because instead I was busy living my life, and applying everything i learned from from nofap in my life, I was constantly keeping physically active and when I had urges I always had something to do, after reaching 90 days my brain had rebooted and life became a new normal I had brought social media back into my life, but was using it in moderation, I was no longer dependent on it, I also felt I could set my own boundaries without feeling like I was missing out on anything life felt amazing and I was feeling fulfilled, skip forward to just days before reaching 6 months, I made one silly mistake of being on my phone in my room thinking I wouldn’t relapse and I was wrong because it happened in the blink of an eye, and there I was starting again for the first time in 6 months, since then I’ve been trying to get back on nofap but I’ve been struggling to stay on nofap, and every time I relapse, I just feel weaker and weaker, for a while now, ive been realizing that something has to change and I’ve been trying to figure out what, but I think I have now got it figured out, firstly my phone usage, being in this state I’m in, im better off doing something else, in response to this relapse I have decided to take a break from all social media, even the important one’s, because rn I’m my own top priority and I’m not going to get better with these influences, its for the best. I’m at one of my lowest moments right now and all I can do is rise.

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Brother, you can find your way back again.

I was so proud of you when I saw that you passed 90 days and beyond. I kept up with your journey and enjoyed the videos you posted as well. You really had figured out how to break out of the cycle.

You had such a strong commitment. It was inspiring to me as I was really deep in the addiction at that time and I was lost, as you feel right now.

Rise from here brother, you don’t belong in the darkness anymore. That chapter of life is over, time to reach the heights you deserve.

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Thank you brother, its good to know my videos helped, i wish you the best in your journey!

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I have got a new YouTube video coming in the next few days or the next week, I did a rehearsal last night and am still writing down the transcript for the main part of the video.

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Brother this fight isn’t over until you win
Never back down prepare for the next round

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