Jared.C🤙 [[My Journey of Self Improvement]]

This is my latest video, I filmed it on my vacation (9th June), I had enough time today to finally upload it.

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Day 76. It’s the longest I’ve been since last year and it hasn’t been easy, i endured some tough times recently and that is why I’m still standing here, times continue to be challenging for me, but I’m starting to adapt to it more, my brain is busy rewiring and thats why times have been tough, I getting more confident by the day the more I’m on nofap, I’ve been working out alot this week I’m able to go further at the gym because I’m retaining all of my energy, im close to finishing my study, I visited my parents recently and am staying a few nights while I’m off work, I’m helping them with stuff on the farm and around the house, when I visit my parents, im that guy who helps do their maintenance, when I’m there I’m the guy who helps keep things running smoothly.

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Crazy character development. Keep it coming :muscle:

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My Latest video :arrow_down::arrow_down:

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Day 81.
I’m feeling so great today, because I finally finished my last bit of study that I have been working on for the past 12 months, all those hours, days, weeks and months of study have been worth it, in recent weeks I had dedicated most of my time in my study, it was real challenging because stuff like this is real boring and it took alot of effort with myself to get it all done and I have to say it’s all worth it in the end, I hand my last bit of study tomorrow I will get a graduation certificate from this to confirm I successfully completed my study. This is the longest I’ve been since last year, ive had a few urges and a few thoughts pop up, but I just let it disappear by itself and get on with my day, I’m making it a thing where I continue transmuting my sexual energy to help me stay on nofap, I’ve come this far I’m not fooled by the triggers that pop up, it’s about being alert and knowing how to respond.

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You’re an inspiration mate! Keep it up brother, stay strong :heart: :muscle: :fire:

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I’m happy to say I’m moving on I haven’t thought about her much which is good, I’ve been more focused on myself, and working more on my confidence, I’ve had a few random encounters mainly small talk, I find that the conversations with these random people are coming more naturally, I did have a dream about her recently but I recognized it as just a dream that can be bound to happen sometimes, all that matters is that im moving on regardless of whether I dream about her or not, a dream is a dream, it’s different from real life.

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Damn bruh, this is so perfectly framed

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Moving on is the best decision of life!

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Yeah bro, dwelling on the past is not healthy, it solves nothing, it induces negative thoughts which can make things worse, its better to be in the present than be in the past.

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Day 90.
My second time going this far, it was not easy, it took alot of commitment, determination and discipline to get this far, there were many challenging times that I could have given in, but I pulled through, it took alot I had to transmute my energy so I wouldn’t go back to pmo, I crossed some challenging hurdles along the way, but with the help of my nofap brothers I pulled through, from day one I decided I’m going to put in more effort and watch my mind like a hawk, this included me getting out of my comfort zone alot and that one of the things that helped the most, my task now is maintaining my good habits on nofap and live above pmo addiction.

Here’s my video below :arrow_down::arrow_down:

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Day 92. I’ve been busy helping my family with some tasks and recently at the gym I had a few bad workouts where my body would try and trick me into giving up mid session, I didn’t fall for my body’s tricks, I pushed through, every workout is a good workout whether it’s a good day or bad day, I still get gains from it, I’m posting here today because I’m feeling some temptation to go back to that darkness my brain knows it’s only a click away its right there, but there is also a strong part of me that still knows the consequences of giving into that temptation, the consequences are endless for an addict, some consequences for giving in, my social anxiety would come back, my clear mind would fogged again and it would increase the chance of me making poor decisions known as binging, my built-up confidence would plummet, I would lack self esteem again, I would end up avoiding challenging situations including social interactions, I would have no energy to do anything, it could affect my job, including poor performance and showing up late, and worst of all it would alienate me from my loved ones including my family and start to neglect them, that would happen because I would be so caught up in pmo that I would almost forget my loved ones exist, they would be consequences for giving into temptation for that little bit of unnecessary pleasure, its just not worth it I have too much to lose, last time I went 90 days and beyond, this is exactly what happened after I fell off the wagon, and it took me 6 months to finally gain traction again, this time I’m going to pay much more attention and make sure I’m much more aware that that it takes only 1 peek to relapse so I don’t make the same mistake that was the reason for my last downfall after my first 90 day reboot on nofap, that strong part of me is the reason I reached 3 months again without relapsing, that strong part of me is also the reason I’m writing this post to be accountable and show you guys I really am committed, I could have given in, but I’m right here right now. Yes I am 90+ days, but I’m not cured, I’m going to be a pmo addict and get urges for the rest of my life, the thing that does change for me is I’m able to manage life without pmo, I live above this addiction while also maintaining my good habits.

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Day 97.
I just made a conscious decision to go to a shop and start a conversation with a cashier to boost my confidence, normally I don’t talk much because I’m shy, but when I arrived at the shop a middle age female cashier served me, I almost didn’t say anything except for hello and thank you, but then I said something funny about a thing I was buying and she started laughing, and I giggled, I left the store and I felt great because I went out of my comfort zone and my confidence felt boosted.

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Some Motivation for you guys!:arrow_down::arrow_down:

Sometimes we all have days where we feel weak and sometimes feel like there is no way out, we feel like we have lost everything, we feel hopeless and that is when we end up making poor choices such as pmo which makes it worse, but there is healthy way to overcome Weakness, that is simply being present with the weakness, riding it out and making yourself vulnerable and let your weakness do its thing while keeping up your hustle, suppressing weakness makes it harder to deal with, instead be with the weakness, ride it out overcome it and you will feel much stronger than you were yesterday or even a few minutes ago.

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Day 100. I am 3 digits clean, these past few days have been hard ngl ive been staying strong, but I’ve been having challenges with my emotions, yesterday I was feeling sad and down in the dumps, but I didn’t let that be the reason for my downfall, no matter what challenges life tries to throw at me, I have just gotta keep pushing.

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Day 102.
Today was just a regular day at work, I didn’t get much sleep last night because the day before I had to run some errands for my family and didn’t get home til after 10 last night, I was asleep by 11:30 and woke up at 5:30 this morning for work I’ve been feeling burnt out lately, so I decided to take tonight off the gym and chill at home but of course I wasn’t going to fall into the trap of doing nothing, when I got home I decided to make homemade soup for the first time, i brought some bones with meat on and lots of vegetables and half an onion chopped them up and boiled them in water it came together quite well despite it being my first time, i was experimenting, i added other stuff such as beef stock, salt, pepper and many other herbs and spices, I also added soup mix which I probably didn’t need, I also added more pepper than I should have, but it was pretty good for my first time making it, at least this food is better than that processed shit you would get from takeaways.

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Even though I recently reached 90 days my struggles are still real, I could lie and say I’m OK on the surface, but deep down in my gut I’m still struggling, 1 of the struggles is the temptation to return to pmo every day, I’ve refused it every day, but in recent times I’ve been finding it hard, sometimes I have been feeling this close to the edge, today felt like a turning point for me, I did 5 mins meditation and that was all I needed to make the right choice, there are struggles too, I’ve been feeling down recently, but I don’t know what’s causing it, I think it’s to do with my mental health, or maybe I’m still rebooting I’m unsure, another factor is loneliness, I mean I have been interacting with people alot, but I still feel lonely for some reason, that is a major trigger for me so this is why I’m open up, why should I pretend everything is alright when really the mental struggles are still real? However when I open up, I feel things are alright after all.

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You’ve made incredible progress in the last 3 months.

Gains in the gym, your confidence and self-esteem has increased, you finally spoke to your ex-girlfriend and got closure about the relationship.

Look back at what you’ve achieved. The bedrock of that self-development was your decision to live above the addiction. Think about all the benefits you have in your life right now. Think of all the things you’ve gained as a result of quitting.

Contrary to all the happy smiling faces we see on social media, it is perfectly normal to get a low mood every now and again. Regrets in our past, discomfort in the present, anxiety about the future - we aren’t going to feel 10/10 all the time. We get lonely, tired, frustrated, bored, stressed. Allow yourself to process the emotions in a healthy way.

PMO never improves our emotional state. It provides a momentary distraction, but the emotions we were trying to escape are still there waiting for us. And we feel even worse afterwards since now we’re back to square one and threw away our progress. If what we wanted was distraction, there are thousands of other things we could distract ourselves with that we wouldn’t regret afterwards - a comedy act, some good music, a conversation with loved ones, a walk in nature, the meditation you did - the list goes on.

Think about it, going over the edge wouldn’t makd things any better. You remember that dark pit, it’s like a black hole. You want to leave but at the same time you want to stay there. It’s a mess. And who knows when you manage to climb out again. And everyone wants to climb out eventually, no one wants to spend the rest of their lives there. So why throw away 3 months clean just to eventually make another journey to get back to 3 months clean?

You’re doing great brother. This low period will pass, and you will remain, stronger than ever. And you’ll be proud of yourself for not giving in. That 5 minutes of meditation offered more relief than PMO has ever been able to give.

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100 % Man, pmo has solved nothing in our lives, its only caused mental/psychological damage to us and it ruined so many lives of poor innocent people.

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Day 105.
Temptation was right in front of me today, today I got a random notification from Google from a site non cornographic, It had a thumbnail which didn’t trigger me, but had the potential to trigger others, based on the thumbnail it was showing, I had 2 choices, click on it and see what it’s about or refuse it. I decided not to click it, the notification had things that I don’t need to know about, it would be a waste of time anyway, it would just be a useless article reading about someone famous, there’s nothing important about that, and given my recent struggles with temptation that would be a potential loophole that could lead me back to pmo, it’s similar to those thirst traps on social media, they are just the worst triggers out there, upon seeing that notification, I removed it and changed some settings so I don’t get anymore of these notifications, throughout the day at work, thoughts kept crossing my mind was thinking about that notification from earlier today, I was having thoughts that should have clicked on it to see what it was about, I didn’t fall for my brains tricks as I have not forgotten what pmo had done to me when I was in this darkness, I started to feel temptation, but I got the upper hand and did another 5 minutes meditation to calm me down, after that I calmed down, I still felt temptation but felt more in control, I continued to transmute my sexual energy at work.

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