Yeah man I havenât watched P in like I think 2 or 3 months now, my level of crave for such content has gone down. Cutting off M is like kind of beginner mode. In real life your not supposed to focus on M but use that energy to do other things. So in real life we are all supposed to normally have long streak or lifetime streaks. I am going for lifetime to experiment on this journey to see where it takes me, the more I lose distractions the more I see that I am getting better in this journey.
So I am one among few whose no PMO streak coincide.
I either have a no PMO streak or not have one at all.
I naturally hate M now when I visualize the following 2 situations:
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How do I feel if I see a guy who canât help but rushing to toilet to fap? Then see now that youâre the guy.
-
How would other girls see me if they know I have such habit? Especially those girls I like?
Hope you can get rid of M soon as well
I previously M after waking up, or watched some triggering photos. But now Iâm pretty confident that I wonât do that anymore. Itâs unattractive to me anymore, especially now I can already feel the benefits - more healthy, more confident, more sporty and outgoing, more proactive at work, more sociable⌠I now choose to pursue my true happiness
The current lot does all this too. And it gets worse because of hookups.
Tho still, India is not like America. But I know how shit is going, especially in urbanized places.
But, we are men of dignity and honour, we know the truth and we have put efforts. Itâs stupid to copy those mfs.
Oh thatâs rough. I would begin with cutting off korn first since itâs the source of the destruction and then M. Doing both in the same time is rough. Atleast for me it was. Thatâs why I did one and then the other follows.
Thanks I will visualize it now .
Doing that will help indeed. I donât think that anyone should fab after such visualization.
I also donât get triggered to watch P anymore whenever I see a trigger content by accident because in my mind I am thinking that she might have a man and that you donât know her life. My mindset it just focus on yourself and whoever comes to your life or anyone you encounter shall happen in itâs time.
Hows it in India ? I thought were was less of it.
Thatâs how you become tough. Currently on a 45 day no PMO streak.
The last fab was due to not sleeping well at night and having a time to ease my mind. I managed to finish my final exams for my classes. But it was tough because I was getting distracted by my lustful energy of M. I watched no Korn. But I can feel the strong urges to do it but I didnât listen to them. It felt like just Korn but in my own head. Our minds are very powerful instruments. Also I didnât exercise because I didnât balance my work and life schedule. But now I have balanced my life better this time. Every week I must do some exercises even if for only 30 minutes and meditate as well.
Day 5 today
Today is Sunday. I donât work today but I have some project to do with my sister today. We have to take apart this car that we are trying to get rid of. Now that I donât have classes for a while I can maybe even finish some of my readings from the library âthe man who couldnât stopâ book. Today will be productive, my Amazon order is also coming today for my nieces birthday this coming week. Ride strong !
Lust is a hot woman who can transform herself to anything you want. But she gives you nothing in return. She only demands your energy not connection. Thatâs the power of lust. She will even turn herself into one of your exes,etc⌠she only cares about herself and her own lustful empire. Unlike a real hot woman we see in real life, that woman has the potential to not suck the life from us or to do just that, but thatâs up to us based on decision we make on that woman. Making sure you look at a womanâs eye more than her body will give you the reality of the world.
"Masculinity, nothing wrong with loving and taking care of who you are as a man, never be ashamed of your manliness, own it. Because itâs all we are in this body. Respect the ying and yang. "
"The spirit of maternity, motherhood, she gives you the ways of a true womanâs dignity. The opposite of lust. She will know all that is of female things.
âThe spirit of paternity, fatherhood, he will show you the art of manhood, the experience we must face, ways to handle situations, encouragement, strength, will push you to respect yourself and not pity yourself but to also not take life too seriously because lifeâs too short.â
~ reminder to self.
Day 7
I did a nice workout session for 30 minutes.
I also catched up on some errands around the house. It was hot. Organized some paperwork. I was tired a little since i didnât sleep much the other day due to doing some car project stuff.
Day 8
I did some errands today. I went to the dentist to get my teeth checked at western dental. It took me almost the whole day to get it checked because I was new to that dentist location and there were not many specialists, had to do paperwork. No urges. But I saw this lady in the dentist office who seemed like she was looking at me, I was afraid to stare back because I didnât want to look awkward. Anyways, I was tired after all of it. Watched âstar wars, revenge of the sithâ movie since I never got the chance to watch it.
Will meditate for a while to some music.
Long day. Meditation before sleep time helps me sleep. - note to self.
Day 12 yesterday
We had a party here in my momâs house and we had a celebration for my nieces birthday Xiomara she is turning 10 years old! I helped with making the charcoal outside to cook delicious steak, nice weather it was. It was so hot though. I wanted to dress different this time in a party event and asked my sister what she thinks of just wearing a shirt and shorts to the party, she said it was casual and okay since itâs a family party event. I overcame my perfectionist attitude towards having to wear a very attention seeking fancy outfit. I acted more with humility this time and surprisngly I felt more comfortable with what I did, I felt like my family was thinking maybe for the first time he wears casual clothes in a party haha. Because normally I donât wear shirt and shorts in a party event even if family gathering. Being more aware of what I wear and do is something I noticed recently. It could be the process of abstinence for very long from Korn and my brain just focusing on other areas.
We had a nice time together. Good Sunday.
2024 Personal counter: copy and paste
(June month)
Weekly meditation practices streak( atleast once per week or mid-day everyday)
Week 1 - 1
Week 2 -
Week 3 -
Week 4 -
Week 5 -
- No PMO hard mode: day 12
- KORN free video content: 95 day
- Free from temptations of lust in media(images, videos on YouTube,etc.) that leads to relapse without korn:
day 12 - Goal: good sleep schedule and manage media use
Screen time on phone daily goal: 0<2hrs, average of 125 minutes max using âstay freeâ stat app.
4.Must stay within range***
Per week or month counter phone use:
Week: I used my phone here and there but not all day. I was busy with some search on different skills to gain like digital art or coding and also part was doing assignments and reading.
Month of March total -
Number of relapses in year total: estim. 11 times Approx. - Progress***
((Try to keep korn free always no matter what and masturbating ))
Day 13 today.
I feel glad that I have updated my Korn free count. I am 3 months officially free from Korn. I feel happy because I havenât realized how much I have done in this journey away from such filthy content. I am surprised how much I have changed my view on Korn these months. I think such content is inhumane.
Today I feel better, feel like I want to workout today after such a party yesterday.
Things to do:
- Exercise( 1 hour)
- Relax the mind (music)
Well done brother
Youâre reprogramming your mind against that filth. You have defeated P, M will follow soon. Keep going man, God bless you
Thanks. I feel like I want to be more human and have the craving to be more human rather than look at a screen at someone doing it or another doing it to someone. Haha. I feel like to defeat P one must first be high off of nature the Devine. Itâs a healthy high better than P that gives us nothing in return.
Day 16
I picked out my blueberries from my blueberry bush. I also went to the concert down in my cityâs County Fair at the evening and they played some nice rock country music. I went with my family mother, sister and young sister. I was shy to dance, I was imagining all the scenarios how I can dance wrong or other thoughts but I danced with my family which gave me comfort, ate some food after. We arrived around 12 a.m. at home.
Day 17 today
I donât work today so I am taking advantage of my time. I had a little visual urge in my mind today while almost waking up.
I think I know the reason why though. Itâs because Iâve been seeing some girls I find attractive in terms of appearance in my retail job while cashiering face to face, they have nice faces, hair, eyes, body, however i dont focus on the body as much and there should be a respect you have with another females body in doing so the lust doesnât overwhelm, because you acknowledge it rather than ignore it but respect is key. Just like a manâs body, we are all part of nature, respect nature. Since my energy is growing in masculinity, i will feel more the energy of femininity in me as well when a female is around me. Thatâs my theory. Anyways, I imagined an attractive girl to me doing me, it just appeared to me in my mind randomly. I got erection, maybe spilling a little. Then once I woke up I thought of other things like what I must do today, that thought of what I must do today gave me energy to hurry to wake.
Things to do:
- Finish FAFSA appeal letter
- Workout to good music
- Read book
- Work on car project
- Meditation
Days most proactive: high state of being more into your own masculinity, peaks (can change)
Day 7, Day 14, day 20, day 30
Less proactive: tired, lethargy, flatlines
Day 2, day 5 *most days for me atleast
Day 27: small wet dream
I had a somewhat wet dream today. I spilled a lot in my underwear actually. It wasnât an entire big dream I would say, it was a short glimpse of a dream after another dream I had that was about exploring places I think.
For some reason I paid a woman $5 for showing me erotic video of a group of girls naked or maybe showing me in real life in this private room where they were in my dream. I didnât act on my impulse to masturbate or to lust. I just stayed still in my bed until I didnât spill anymore. After I woke up, I took a shower to clean myself and change. I didnât think I would spill with such a small wet dream that didnât last long. It was just a woman who was naked on top with legs spread out but V didnât show along with other group of girls naked besides her. I guess I got too stimulated from it. It could also be a way for my mind to use such mental images to cause me to release. Hopefully overtime wet dreams go away.
Today I learned a bit about how to do breathing meditative techniques to make you feel high naturally. It felt great after I tried it.