You lost a battle not the war.
I am sure that you will come back even stronger and i am sure that you are very knowledgeable about this topic, but i think there are few important ideas i would like to talk about.
I know the easypeasy book is a very good book, but it is not this book that will save you, it is you. I started reading this book, i did not finish it yet, so i don’t know if what i will say now is true, but i think that this book lacks something which is real life actions. I know it is an amazing book that clarifies all the misconceptions and the myths we have always been trapped in, however, until the page i have read the book did not talk about the importance of getting rid of the triggers and blocking all the ways to porn, nor making our future plans and following them. We use PMO to fill a gap we have in our lives, but in reality PMO is only increasing this gap. Thus, i suggest that you set your future plan and work on it, in addition to all the other measures that you take and you will definitely win bro.
Personally, since i decided what my future goals are and i committed myself fully to accomplishing them, i made a lot of progress.
Good luck bro. I am sure that we will win this battle soon.
You lost a battle not the war.
Thank you for sharing these insights with me. I’m glad there are companions who are willing to help each other.
Yes exactly, indeed I relapsed after being unpolite and disrespectful with my family (something that I hated myself for) and after being frustrated for the lack of progress towards my goals.
So the next steps will be:
- Read some parts of Easypeasy once again: I wouldn’t have relapsed despite of frustration, if I had truly decided to stop once and for all
- Find ways to be more consistent in the process of achieving my goals
I have plans for my goals, however what I lack is consistency in the short term. Time to fix that.
I wish you lots of success!
Weekly report (day 1)
I haven’t been very productive yesterday nor the day before yesterday, here are a few things to change.
Life vision: how can I improve?
sleep: increase the meditation time to 20 minutes (sometimes the thoughts keep infesting my mind)
health: read once again the Easypeasy method, identify the missing piece (I have already an intuition, but I’m not sure)
health: read once again the Easypeasy method and put an end to a tweak that has been torturing me for 1 year
coding: keep following data science lessons every day (except Saturday)
relationships: send at least 1 message to the girl I feel attracted to
Reflection of the week
Take your time to think about your future. Consider things carefully. Ask yourself what you want to do exactly. Plan your future according to your values and, if possible, according to what you’re passionate about. Don’t rush, because you risk making my same mistake, which is climbing the wrong ladder. If you make this mistake, you waste pretious time in the process of building the perfect life.
I’ve also realised that not living according to your values leads to a lot of pain and suffering. If you care about your family spend quality time with them, if you want to pursuit something don’t force yourself to pursue something different. Don’t fool yourself. The process of growth doesn’t have to be painful: on the contrary, it can be rewarding and satisfying.
Hope you enjoy
Bro, you failed because you didn’t really understand the ideas of that book. Read it again. Take 7-10 days and read easy-peasy, YBOP and other books related to pmo addiction. Thousands of new studies and books are being published about this!
I suggest you to take a break from the forum. It won’t help. Here everyone is using the will power method. It won’t work. You read the posts by people failing and trying again, trying hard you’ll lighten the brainwashing in your brain. The hack author himself has said about it!
I don’t get any thoughts about pmo now. What easypeasy does is take away the need and desire in us to do pmo. Once it is gone, what is left is, the dopamine addiction and it is very easy to conquer. The withdrawals of pmo addiction is very weak, like a small fever, or missing something etc. We are lucky that our withdrawals are weaker than heroine addicts. People die due to the withdrawals of heroine addiction. But the Brian changes of pmo and heroine are same! Both conquer the sexual pathways of our Brian! DAMN!!!
@tagore I will take into consideration the idea of reading other books on the same topic. The Easypeasy method was working really well, but I think there was still some brainwashing left. Otherwise I would have refused to have another session. In other words, I still think that PMO brings some sort of pleasure. I’ll read the book once again, read other ones and remove 100% of the brainwashing!
I’m currently reading YBOP, and making acceptable progress towards all my current goals. Always moving forward, guys! Our aim should be improving every day!
Life vision: what to reinforce?
- coding lessons after dinner
- enough sleep and stretching in the evening
Life vision: how can I improve?
Easypeasy method for hand tweak: journaling in the morning and after lunch
Easypeasy method for other 2 tweaks: journaling in the evening
productivity: replacing Youtube with meditation after lunch, starting the study session earlier
Reflection of the week
One word is fundamental for success: persistence. You don’t need to be incredibly smart in order to achieve a goal, you only need 2 things: 1) a clear plan; 2) the persistence required to stick to it.
That’s it. Nothing more. According to my experience, at least .
Quote of the week
Be very impatient with your skill, be very patient with the results.
Hope you enjoy
It is the end of the year, and it is time to look back and consider what we did well, but also to come up with new plans for the future. A few days ago I created the “blueprint for 2021”. Working to fullfill our ambitions!
(I’m not writing about my streak anymore, it keeps increasing over time, if you want to see it you can use my sharing code )
Life vision: how can I improve?
Easypeasy method for hand tweak: 3 days to complete the mindset shift
coding: exploiting all the time available during the holidays (2-4 hours per day) to learn Python for data science
Lesson learnt this week
I learnt the concept of productive procrastination (sounds stupid, I know ): when you don’t feel like doing something and find yourself procrastinating, ask yourself the following question: what do I really want to do in this moment? Then procrastinate by doing that activity.
Practical example: you’re scrolling through Youtube and you become aware of the fact that you’re procrastinating. Then you realize that you would really like to listen to music in that moment, so instead of wasting time with your phone you procrastinate by listening to music.
Quotes of the week
"Quitting isn’t a cure all for your life problems – but it’s the foundation, a ploughed field in which you can sow seeds for a new future that isn’t bedevilled by the secrecy and shame that comes with falling into the seemingly inescapable pit of porn-related despair that so many of us know. A life of hope and strength – not jizzy tissues, jealousy, bitterness, self-hatred, resentment and unfulfilled dreams."
“If you really wnat to succeed in the long run, you have to bring more value than you get in return. You have to consistently give more than you take. That’s how you win.”
Hope you enjoy
I slipped once again. I’m speechless .
And the curious thing is that I had experienced the “moment of revelation” Easypeasy talks about. Enthudiastically escaping from the illusion just to walk straight back into it. How silly…
This is the sign that there are still other lessons of the book that are not solidified: for a moment I thought that PMO actually brings pleasure…
Then I realised that the trap is designed to keep us hooked for the rest of our lives.
I absolutely need to check the lessons related to stress and pleasure. Clean up my brain, eradicate the remaining brainwashing. Completely clean my mind.
You know that moment in which your mind is telling: “I don’t want to have the final session, why should you make me do it?”? You know that moment of tremendous relief, once you finish the final session and realise that a huge burden has been lifted off your shoulders? This is what I’ve just experienced.
I spent a few hours going through the lessons of Easypeasy once more, and found the mistakes that led me to the relapse last time. Now that the mistakes are fixed, the torture is fnally ended. No more slavery. Here’s what I did wrong:
- Still believing that PMO was a form of pleasure and relief from stress. After a lot of journaling it became clear that it is actually the opposite. I got rid of the brainwashing.
- Waiting for the final visit. At first I wanted to reread all Easypeasy because of yesterday’s relapse, and after a few days repeat the last visit. Then I realised that I should do it in that precise moment. I wanted to become free in that moment: no more waiting. So that’s what I’ve just done: I faced the fear of the final visit, and now I know that I won’t come back to that filthy world again. Now I understand what ‘making a solemn resolution’ means.
It’s time to enjoy life. What else can I say? There’s nothing more left to do, apart from one thing: letting the dopamine craving monster die, by rejoicing every time a pathetic temptation comes back.
Stay strong brothers
Where are you, brother?
Click here before reading
Hi everybody, it’s Steven! Yes, I’m back again.
I created this post for two reasons:
- make a final commitment to quit the addiction and stick to it
- Inspire you as well to put an end to your addiction
This is why in the post below you’ll see that I frequently shift from the pronoun ‘I’ to the pronoun “you”, and viceversa. Please notice that making a commitment is serious stuff… if you want to do it too, please read Easypeasy Way Hackbook before quitting. Reading it is fundamental.
From now on, I am back in the forum. I don’t know for how long, I only know that being accountable to others is a necessity.
Enjoy the post!
It’s been a looong time…
And now I’m back. As you can understand, I relapsed another time. During these months while I wasn’t active in this forum, I succeded two times in kicking the addiction, only to come back at it when things got tough or hard. It was some sort of ping pong, quitting for some days making a final commitment and then walking back into the same trap I had left behid.
The justification was always this: “Oh I’ve got an urge! It is a little bit painful, isn’t it? Why don’t I just have a session? All the discomfort will go away, I’ll feel better!”. Sounds familiar, uhu?
It is a LIE. The stress won’t disappear, on the contray each and every disgusting session increases the amount of stress that you feel. If you continue feeding your brain with dopamine, how can you suppose that in th future your desire for dopamine will be reduced?
With each and every session you will need more of the disgusting stuff,you will grow more addicted.
Your addiction is slowly destroying you… each and every day that passes it is draining your energy and vitality…
So why not quitting now?
You've got the opportunity to quit once and for all. Do it NOW.
This is what I told myself after today's session.
But how can I do it? It’s very simple. Make a commitment and respect it. Swear to yourself, to God, to the ones you love the most, to whoever you want that you will NEVER watch porn again. No matter how hard your life becomes, you are not going back to that awful world.
An this is exactly what I’m doing right now…
From this moment on, I commit to never watching pornography again.
Nor videos nor static images, nor reading erotic stories. Nothing else, I am done.
Finally, how can I solidify such a commitment? I have to do something every day, starting from today, to solidify my new identity. I’m not a person who gives in to urges anymore. Finally I am free, the small voice can keep whispering at my ear but I won’t listen to it.
And now, enjoy freedom! Keep working on your perfect life, never question this commitment, and most importantly continue building this new identity!
Hey welcome back brother @StevenSuccessJourney . Get rid of this shit once and for all this time. Join the nofap war challenge buddy. With extreme accountability and unity we are killing the game in that thread
I’m happy to hear from you after a long time, @Tagore! Yes, now I’m ready: 100% commitment, finally taking full responsibility for our actions!
It is all very clear now, accepting responsibility for each and every action is the key to keep ourselves accountable.
We cannot blame external circumstances, or other people… ultimately, we are the ones who decide to open our browser and give in to temptations.
It is always our fault.
And since it is always up to us to masturbate and relapse, it is also up to us to decide to remain clean for one day, for 100 days, for 1000 days, for the rest of our life!
However, there’s a problem…
We don’t trust ourselves anymore… we’ve broken our promises so many times, that telling ourselves that we have finally quit seems like a joke. I bet a part of you remains very skeptical, it keeps whispering in your ear: “Oh, you’ve already promised so many times and you’ve always failed, making another promise is useless because you won’t keep your word”.
But I’m sure you have kept your word many times in the past. When you decided to save some money to buy yourself a gift, when you committed to passing an exam… You’ve always succeded in these situations.
So what’s different about quitting PMO?
Nothing. Yup, this is the truth. There is nothing different, it is as simple as sticking to one promise.
Isn’t it time then to get rid of the addiction?
Isn’t it time to build back trust in ourselves, self respect, confidence hat we can do whatever we decide to do?
We can all succeed. Accept full responsibility for every action, and you will succed.
Getting urges? Try this!
Try to picture in your mind the last time you had an urge and wasn't able to get over it.
You felt anxious, stressed, or lonely, maybe you were bored…
You may have fought against the urge, or you may have given in immediately, firing up your browser after only one second. Then you felt you were unable to stop, thus you completely surrendered. You stopped fighting, and decided to watch porn and masturbate. Another time.
I bet that relapse was a painful experience…
But what if I told you that I found an extremely powerful ‘technique’ to cope with urges? I can’t guarantee that it will work for everybody: actually I only tested on myself, so I can only speak from my experience. However this could be the opportunity to try it.
So how does this ‘technique’ work?
First of all, more than a technique this is a mindset shift. And it is based on the concept of sexual transmutation.
For those of you who don’t know it (but I’m pretty sure you do know, otherwise you wouldn’t be on Nofap), sexual transmutation consists in using your sexual energy for productive activities. Instead of wasting all of the energy of your semen through masturbation, you channel it and use it to achieve your goals and improve.
So here’s how you can deal with urges:
When you become aroused don’t be desperate and don’t panick; this is not the signal that you will fail. You can beat that urge, if you wish to do so.
Instead, grow extremely motivated. The urge you are getting is the signal that a huge amount of energy is growing inside of you. Become excited, become happy! Your body is providing you with all the energy you need to reach your goals!
Each time you become aroused your body is giving you energy for free. It is almost like a vending machine, the only difference is that you don’t have to pay anything in order to get that energy.
Sexual energy and arousal are two extremely powerful resources you can tap into whenever you get urges.
Of course, in order to transmutate your sexual energy you must have clear goals in mind. If you haven’t done so yet, take your time to reflect about what you want to achieve in life. It is important.
Then, once you have more clarity, you can start using those urges as tools for your success, like I do.
The strategy I presented may not work, but honestly I find it really helpful.
I wish you all the best…
I would like to share this video with you, I find it very inspiring
Thanks @Forerunner for all the effort you put in to record these videos. They’re extremely pretious!
You’re welcome brother. I will start posting videos again soon.
I collected a few personal reflections and quotes taken from books, I’ll post them below. Not only I need to put them somewhere, but I hope you will find something pretious or inspiring in them. Something to reflect on in order to become a little bit wiser.
Quotes and reflectionsBeing useful to the world or to your local community, dedicating your whole existence to helping others: this is probably the best thing you can do with your life. Knowledge, success and power eventually wear out. They succumb to the usury of time. Everything good you do to the world, on the contrary, is eternal and immortal: the only thing that truly matters.
Don’t underestimate the power of wealth, though (especially if you have a huge mission to bring forward). Money has the potential to amplify the positive impact that you create during your lifetime. Nihil tam munitum quod non expugnari pecunia possit.
“L’immortalità della specie dovrebbe mitigare il dolore di ogni morte umana.” - “The eternity of the species should mitigate the pain caused by each human death.”
“I grandi uomini emergono proprio in virtù di un atteggiamento estremo, e il loro eroismo consiste nel mantenervisi per tutta la vita.” - Great men stand out because of an exxagerated behaviour or tendency, and their heroism consists in maintaining this attitude for a whole life.