Hey brother @koaxicek, you are doing fine brother, donât think too much about it.
When I started nofap and was on my first high streak (close to 20-25days) I saw a significant increase in testestrone and sex drive and would look and observe any girl, but it felt like I was seeing girl in a new way for the first time, it was a completely new experience (see, all my life I was addicted to porn, so I was not interested in them and when I left it, I was not able to understand these new changes in our body which we naturally have so it was a bit overwhelming)
I got urges seeing them, whether they wore full clothes or provotically, I would admire them.
Next, when I relapsed all that feeling disappeared and then I again did not felt to talk to them or look at themâŚ
Then I realized that
- Firstly, it was a trick of our brain to indulde in old ways and be addicted to this habit and
- Secondly, we are always going to get high feelings and urges by seeing girl when we are on good nf streak.
Now real question lies, how to tackle these urges?
See, we have to tame our mind slowly and get accustomed to these feelings. We are going to get urges thatâs for sure, it shows that you are recovering and it are normal. You should be worried if you donât get urges by talking and seeing a real woman!!
Now, for taming your mind start to not look at them for more than 3seconds by this method you can distract your mind from them.
Slowly you will get accustomed to not look at them and you will get accustomed to live normally with high levels of testestrone.
Next, when you have started to gain control over this feelings and can look at girls normally then start thinking about complex things like she is a good human being, she paints really well, I am becoming a man and should not look at her in wrong way, I should focus on myself and wait for the right woman, the right time will come, I have to focus on myself, she is just a normal human being just like me with feelings of love, anger, loneliness, sadness etc.
By doing this you will be able to gain a lot of control on yourself and redirect your energy in doing the real things in life like working on yourself, giving time to your family, spending time on your hobby and slowly girls will become a normal human beings, you wonât be a slave to your mind and even if you see a girl dressed inappropriately you will think what circumstances led her to behave this way, we have to tame our mind, it is our enemy we have to make it our biggest and strongest ally.
Just work on yourself and wait for the right girl and automatically you will know who she is when you meet new girls and know about them.
Rest my brothers @debellator and @Cubenix have given you great advices as always about the psychology of getting dressed in provoctive way and other stuff.
But my friend it will take time, only time and perservance can heal our brain, this is a new experience, consider it your second life.
Hope my message seemed helpful, we are gonna win over this habit all the best brother