Day 24
Heavy depression, I’m feeling like a parasite right now who eat, shit and sleep. Urge for picking as well and porn flashes in rows comes very strong. I have to survive this, I don’t want to leave with chains anymore.
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Is there anything that can improve your mood?
For example a playlist? taking a small nap helps me too sometimes. Short exercise(like 15min) also energize and refresh my mind. also eating something good. These are some of my options.
IT WILL PASS. That’s the most important knowledge to keep yourself safe. Meanwhile try doing something to improve your mood.
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That doesn’t mean you are worthless. You are putting up a fight. We recognize your effort, brother.
Sometimes you have to do that. I had to do that for some days before i could recover and be active. Even to this day, i am not at my 100%
You have the desire to be active. This ‘will’ will help you out. Take baby steps.
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I’m not going to lie this part of recovery is rough, but will you let that be the excuse for you falling? Or will you pass this phase because your goal is to actually beat this? You’ve got what it takes bro. Stand firm and fight back! I was there too and passed it. Trust me it’s worth it.
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These words are very encouraging, brother @ERNOL and gives me a breeze of dignity. Thanks man
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Brother @Sacred yeah it’s getting tougher from here, I feel like a missing piece from me right now. Feeling empty.
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My brother, You need to find ways to improve your mood when feel down. I know easier said than done. This may happen again in the future and this thing can create problem for you in this journey. It’s best to have the solution ready beforehand.
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Day 25
Yesterday due to high pressure to pick I logged in Instagram account after 25 days and I started to check the hotties I used to follow. I could not stay more than 5 minutes though, because I didn’t like it anymore, I felt like I don’t belong in that world anymore and I wanted to go back in my world with flaws.
After a while I started to assembling a vision about my future and it was beautiful. I realised later that vision could be lived at this moment, right now, but due to this plague PMO I’m not living it. But one day that vision would turn into reality, it must because everyday spend as nofapper makes me like myself.
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Congratulations bro for your progress. You are good and strong. Stay firm!!
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Thanks @HE-MAN123 that means a lot… I want to see progress from you as well, I know you can do it.
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Day 26.
I just found myself today when I closed my eyes between choosing to kiss a girl and to put her to give me a head. It wasn’t an easy decision because the first thought was to put her down for a head, eventually I chose to kiss her and I felt amazing.
Sometimes I thing good Lord has prepared a girl for me, but she’s in pending because I would hurt her if He will give it to me right now, and eventually she will leave me. God knows I’m not ready for her,not yet.
Fuck you porn.
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Day 27.
I read all day hystory and when I got tired of reading, done my exercises and then come back to read and again do my exercises.
I observe something push me to try new things or to do things at least, anything, doesn’t matter what. My brain or my spirit doesn’t want me anymore to lay down and do nothing, after PMO I would sleep, watch TV, play a stupid game or pitying myself for hours and days. I can’t oversleep anymore now, watching TV bore me very quick and lost interest in playing games.
One huge thing I realised today, PMO robbed of my deeds to.
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Day 28.
Shit day but at least I got a job for 3 days, isn’t much but it is a good start.
I have to carry some rubber to the skip with an wheelbarrow, I hope they won’t break me in pieces. Well at least I getting back in society after 3 months of laying down.
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That’s awesome, well done!
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Everything big and great had to start somewhere. I feel glad for you. It’s a good sign that you are on the right track. Let’s work towards building meaningful lives for ourselves, and others. Porn and masturbation afflicted life is just hell. We don’t know what worst path the satan may futher take us. Gbu!
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Thanks @HE-MAN123, yes we can build ourselves and our lifes. It’s not an easy journey, though.
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Day 29.
Day one work, it wasn’t as bad as I expected, only the guy I was worked with he start to tell me all his sex adventures he had and me all I could say was : aha, aha. It was disturbing for me, but I endured all his stories with a fake smile.
Isn’t easy at all.
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Day 0.
I did it.
I watched porn, Instagram and edging. At one point in the middle of it a brother sent me a message and I stopped. I realised what I was doing I deleted everything and I went to sleep, but I couldn’t sleep. I opened my phone to watch porn and edging again, but I hadn’t orgasm because I felt ashamed to throw away my semen.
I consider this a defeat, watching porn and edging, so I want to start from day 0. I feel very bad, like someone stole my one month salary right now.
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Damn bro. Really thought you had it this time. It’s alright man, tommorow is a new day. A new start, and hopefully the last one. You’ve got my support brother, I know how hard this can be. I suggest you make a plan that you will follow. Helps a lot.
Now just because your streaks starts tommorow again doesn’t mean you should do more damage now right? And just think about it. Nearly a months worth of progress will not disappear so fast. Strengthen that determined muscle by staying away. I know how hard the chaser effect can hit.
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You should have contacted me 
Anyway, let’s try to retake your steak from tomorrow and this time you are not allowed to fail! 
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