if you’re going to the doctor might as well check all of them. HbA1c, Iron and vitamin levels. Esp Vit D.
okay
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True
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Well , it was overconfidence
I jinxed myself to relapse . It was no urge , I feel it was an action out of emptiness and the thoughts of being away from it , I ended up doing it . I don’t feel regretted but disappointed to give care to it and lessen my powers , but the number of days wont affect me , I am stronger , I’ve only had two minor slips out of two months . I will go on doing things as I was but at the same time , it was a lesson . I don’t fear the thoughts now that I won’t be able to recover on time or that I will have to go through shit , they’re all psychological , I have recovered greatly but I need to take care of the mental aspect that it puts , it is always there somewhere in the form of mental masturbation , overthinking and fantasizing . I need to find out why really I want seek it , why do I feel I am not free while I am free and set myself free. To be honest , my addiction was related to deeper things and while I sought to work on them , I didn’t do it on time so it had to happen . It won’t happen now , I will be careful . Important lesson
I will give no care to it , focus more and stay aware .
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Whenever I go somewhere I see most of the short peoples around me I feel a lil motivated but whenever I see tall people than me (rarely) I get insecure too! 
all of my friends of elementary school are now taller than me 5.7ft is short 
bro atleast you are taller than me.
Salman and sharukh khan this guys are 5.8ft too (still short)
but do not afraid you will be taller and strong if you start doing streching and start practicing jumping 
like taekwondo athletes do stretchings and basketball players jumps that’s why they are tall you should start from low jumps on the hard surface.
You can go through a limb lengthening surgery to get more tall,
that’s the only option for you 
but,
I won’t prefer it although with age people tend to lose some inches of their height till the age of 50 people loses almost 5cm from there height! 
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I fell into chaser after that 1 mistake
and its so bad I had to come back write here
I was focusing on not thinking about it and moving on , and it was working . I was peaceful and happy
but ended up taking the worst turns
I always stopped it by regretting and thinking about it
I relapsed twice today and don’t feel anything at all
its critical now because it couldn’t have been a worse time than this to be stuck here
this is not how I lose after everything
I wish I never fell into this
more I wish , I lived my life calmly instead of regretting and creating dark memories
even if Im calm now , but Im afraid inside
I have been afraid all the time , that’s the reason I end up getting back to it isn’t it , being afraid and not being free from it
But I still don’t have the time to regret about it . Even if I might face consequences for sometime , I will battle it . I know most of the things but due to overthinking and judgement . There is minimal 50 days left now , if I work on moving on , I might be completely well but if I keep fearing , I will surely be not well .
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do you want to go for an accountability challenge, 7 days of warm up studies(10+ hours) YPT and Nofap.
If it goes well, we can extend it.
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Sure why not
Reluctant about ypt because device is the reason I reach bad places
But its mostly during uncontrollable usage
I will find a way
Lets go for it
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Bro u can cross initial 3 days only with the help of willpower. No technique will work cause the relapse is fresh. U have to be hard on yourself. Say “I WON’T RELAPSE TODAY , NO MATTER WHAT. EVEN IF THE DEVIL HIMSELF COME FOR ME , I WILL ACCEPT TO DIE BUT NEVER RELAPSE. LET’S SEE WHAT HE CAN DO IF I DON’T PUT MY HAND INSIDE PANTS 
”
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Then only use your mobile for YPT, and allow apps you need for studying.
Cool. Check in study hours in YPT, and Nofap in challenge thread. From tomorrow it begins. @The_Ambitious_One 
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