Seriously! 10 days straight and I go back to it. I fucking can’t get rid of porn and I can’t stop thinking about it! How the f*ck am I supposed to get past all this when I’m feeling lonely, anxious, sexually frustrated, and completely disconnected!? How!? This is impossible!
If anyone can give me answers or tips or anything like that, I’d appreciate it. But don’t give me any optimism or any form of praise or anything like that when I don’t deserve it. I just want answers. And yes, this may turn into a venting post, so please bear with me and my idiocy and loser-like persona.
The energy cannot be destroyed it only changes. In order to change this energy i recomend you to focus in sports , arts ( all of them). Meditating, sourround with people, talk to someone you would’t talk, lend a hand to someone in need and the energy inside you will start rise in the positive way. If you don’t do any of these habits, start with one . learn how to play an instrument, etc.
One problem. I never have the motivation to do it. And even if I DO do it, I have to f*cking drag myself to actually do it. I don’t do things out of passion or out love anymore. When I do things, I usually do it out of hatred. So yeah, this doesn’t work.
If you ask me, you won’t be able to quit with this mind set. anxiety, loneliness, frustration, self hate are the strongest trigger for porn. your brain is FLEEING from your life because it can’t bear it. You don’t give yourself joy so it searches the joy in porn.
You will make it to 10 maybe 15 or 20 days just out of pure willpower but than you will relapse. start small and integrate small kinds of joy everyday. I know your situation. you don’t wanna feel joy in your day but you have to force yourself. It sounds stupid but smile more, look at things positively. It helped me a lot.
Hey, I see a lot of myself in you, I don’t know if this is your case but I’ve always had trouble expressing myself, being anxious and shy, this has made me a very lonely and angry person, and porn was, in the past, something i thought was saving me in some way, because it was making me feel pleasure and by seeing all this different women and sometimes contacting them (webcam, custom videos) was a way to feel accompanied. I have a lot of issues with myself and the thought of dying has even become attractive to me and this is when I realized I need to find the way to save myself otherwise it will be too late in the future, I know porn is not the only issue, but at least I know it’s one of them, so this is my advice for you, make a decision, make rules for yourself, I think life is meaningless, none of us chose to exist, we can be a piece of shit to everyone, live in loneliness and be in pain all the time and no one will care and it’s not going to matter 100 years in the future, but we can at least try to make our existence more bearable. So if you know what is wrong with you, one of those things being porn, make the decision to eliminate that from your life, no matter how hard it is, maybe doing this will make things better in the future, I don’t know, I’m with a 35 days streak and I feel even worse than before, but at least I’m doing something different, the only thing left for us is hope. And about what you said regarding motivation to do anything, the fact that you are breaking the habit of giving yourself pleasure so easily with porn (maybe that’s why you have low motivation for anything that requires effort) will slowly start to make you interested in other things that you can do with your time and put effort again in finding a way to make yourself feel better, I think that’s natural, for me for example has been writing here and in a diary.
Don’t mean to be an a**hole, but please, tell me something I don’t know. I already heard about point of view and smiling more, and I just end up in the same conclusion and just repeat the same mistakes again and again and again.
I already do writing and I still don’t feel any better or any motivation. It’s not like I just write something and then everything turns our just fine. Not all stories have happy endings.
Sorry that we repeat our self but what do you wanna hear?
Take out your magic stick and whish it away?
If you think that there is an easy answer, something you can do today so that you are awesome tomorrow, than what do you think why we are still here?
This is a damn hard journey!
If someone comes here and says he feels amazing but still has this addiction I wouldn’t comment with the feel better shit. But if you come here and say that you feel like a looser, dumb and everything than it’s damn obvious why you have the addiction.
I was on the bottom too. I tried to kill myself due to depression. And the ONLY way that helps is to force yourself to feel better even if you don’t want. You think I’m an idiot but someday you will realize that it really is the only option.
And there is no solution which counts for everyone. You have to spend hours to figure out for yourself what helps and what doesn’t
Well, then I guess I’m doomed. I just understand how you people can be so damned positive about any of this especially when there’s a lot of mental and spiritual suffering involved. I don’t understand how this is going to make me a better person, and to be honest, I don’t even know why I’m here. I just want a woman to be with and I heard from a source that this would be start for that. I don’t get how any of you get so far without any tapping. And I’m pissed because I feel like I can’t do it and even by forcing myself, I’m not even going to feel better. That’s like force g myself to go to the gym when I don’t want to, and believe me, I do. I really do out of punishment. I just don’t know what the hell I’m doing hete and why I’m even trying this. It feels like a waste of time.
Maybe give this I try it works for me but I’m still on my quest so to speak.
Imagine a more Superior version of your self in your mind. Far smarter and wise than the version you are now. He’s analytical, decisive and more courageous. He laughs in the
face of danger and is not afraid of any confrontation. He is serious in the the affairs of the world but has a sense of humor and a heart made of pure gold. Now imagine that version of yourself with one of his hands stretched out towards you with palms open and he keeps saying find me. Now your task is to hunt him down like a wolf chasing his prey!. How do you do this?? By thinking like he does… That’s it. Do what he would do and by doing so you are tracking the trail he has left behind. He’s smarter than you so he is well versed in knowledge ( start reading any of your choosing of course), he’s stronger physically so think how did he get to that point etc if you get my drift. But only you and you only know who you want to become so use thus as basis. Hope this made some sort of sense my friend lol.
No it doesn’t, because it doesn’t feel realistic. I can never be the best that I am. Because I’m a failure in every sense of the word. Just look at how many times I’ve relapsed. The man that I am now can never be the man you are describing. It’s an absolute fiction.
I don’t have the money for a psychotherapist. So yeah, that’s not helpful. And as for getting rid of an addiction, especially for me, is impossible. I jusy keep stumbling onto the same mistake over and over, and over again. Just like I told the last guy: Just look at how many times I’ve relapsed. How can I have positivity after so many f*ck ups I’ve done?
Hey man, I’m not here to tell you exactly how to do this because I still haven’t beaten it but it’s not a sprint it’s a marathon. The fact that you’re even here means you know it’s a problem and that’s a positive. Lives can always be turned around. Small victories every day are what really helps us all get through this. The biggest thing that works for me is meditation, have you tried any for of meditation at all?
Well then my friend then there’s not much I can so for you. It takes sheer will power and lots of it. It doesn’t matter how many times you relapse or give in to the urge as long as you try again and again and again and again. If you relapse every other day still fight it man. Its your choice my friend do you want die a sheep or as a wolf. A sheep will just accept things how they are… even DEATH with no fighting sprit whatsoever but a WOLF… Well we all know what I wolf can do don’t we!
How impractical do you think I am? Of course I’ve done meditation! And look where I am: back in the same hole I’m trying to dig out of; If not even making deeper. The fact that of the matter that these small victories mean something is just a mere respite from an exhausting struggle that’s just impossible. I’m tired of hearing the same **damned ra-ra speech of positivity and doing better next over and over and over again. I’m just a cursed mortal made to be making the same mistakes over and over again. Call me exagerative, unreasonable, or fcking drama queen and laugh at me for being a loser, but this is my reality. So far it’s my fourth day and I’m still feeling the urges, the loneliness, the sexual frustration and the pressure… And I doubt I can take another week. I feel like I will just simply fall again and start all over just to continue a futile and never ending crucible.
Save me the pep talk. I’ve already heard it a billion times and I’m sick of it. To be honest, it sounds very patronizing since we all know I’m just fated to fail over and over and over; never to succeed. I’m no wolf. I was never meant to be wolf and there’s no evidence or any sign of me being this supposed wolf that so many believe me to be. If anything, I am a failure and a fool only to try this futile challenge over and over
Understand the “why?”.
Quitting must come from reasons that are valid and important to your subconscious, otherwise you’ll end up relapsing.
Personally, I analysed my life and it hit me hard that all the misery, the failures and shortcomings I have in life were primarily due to PMO. I lost over 15 years of my life due to PMO. 15 years I’ll never get back. It broke my heart knowing how much I would have accomplished in life if a decade and a half worth of energy weren’t wasted on virtual moving images. Nothing is more pathetic than PMO I promise you.
Understand your worth. Embrace your nature as a man. Know the value of your sperm. And respect women.
Goodluck mate.,
you got now all the advises anyone can get. so take it or leave it.
try hard as everyone here, try to be motivated and see a goal or leave and come back when you wanna try to quit. your just mememeing. you got all the advises. think about what all the people here said an come back when you are ready