When you start seeing not only watching porn as problematic but also edging behavior, you’ll again a lot of awareness and realize how early things can start to go wrong.
Edging can be any pattern that mimics porn behaviors. So it can be doing “research”, go into “click bait”, watch some sexy videos or surf with the intention to find something.
I’ll give you an example:
So recently I noticed a new pattern in my behavior. I would read news more often. I didn’t quite understand it at first but it dawned to me that the underlying reason was me hoping to see maybe some news about an “instagram star” or “celebrity”, whatever could be somewhat “interesting”. At its core, this behavior is basically my brain having the hope to see something, get me closer to porn. This is edging behavior.
In the past…
I would get to maybe a good 130 days streak and slowly engage more in that type of things. I had other means back then. Maybe I’d watch some video on youtube, or do some “research” about a model or something. The urges started to get stronger. Maybe more mistakes pile up, boom, relapse at 150 days.
So, what to do?
I highly recommend taking a couple of minutes at one specific day each week and think about edging behavior patterns you might have. Try to eliminate those. Maybe it’s the best to say goodbye to youtube, if that’s a weak link in your journey. Maybe don’t read the news anymore or only allow yourself news from one source that is safe. By doing this regularly, you’ll get free of obstacles in your recovery and you’ll also get better at anticipating your edging behavior patterns. And the less you have of those, the easier it is to abstain from porn.