[23 M] Bytewar's diary: Onwards

My journey to realizing my potential.


One thing I’m pursuing is getting the driver’s license, I’ve already passed the field test and I’m waiting for the computer exam.
I have to revise the book now.

After I got the license I’m planning to subscribe to the gym.


Day 1
Early to bed early to rise. Transport to work takes more than an hour so I read books on my phone, same thing when I go back home. Trying to avoid the TV since it makes me stay late, I don’t watch much, just casually, but that’s enough to mess my schedule up.

That’s about it for now.


Rise up again brother!

It’s time to wake up! It’s time to change your life! Getting your license, going to the gym, improving in your career and finances, being happy and productive. You have what it takes to break free.

No amount of binging will satisfy you. It’s not pleasurable, and it’s never enough. One website has enough pornographic videos that it would take over 10,000 years to watch each one. It will never be enough. The only way is to leave it all behind. You’re not missing out on anything by escaping the addiction. Life is so much better without it, you finally advance and achieve the dreams and goals that have been dancing around in your head for years.


Day 2 was clean.

Today as I woke up, I had the urge and my immediate reaction was to fight it while staying right there but it was getting stronger and I knew if I continue to struggle with it I’ll lose, just like I did many times before. And so I counted 5, 4, 3, 2 … UP! Made my bed and off to my morning activities. Later I was glad I didn’t relapse.

After I went to work, I got an urge to watch, and I watched some gifs and I stopped it there but, I fear this might lead me to relapse later tonight. If I sleep before 10 I can avoid any urge so I’ll do that. I’m heading to make it for a week.


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Good work brother :+1:

Remember though that if you find yourself in a position where you cannot escape the urge, instead face it head on. If you have read any of my posts on this, then you should try it out. I will repost it below for you. But what has worked for me is to write exactly what the urge is saying and discover its reasons for occurring, then I am able to counter argue with it and beat it. It may take you several times to finally beat it, but it can really make the difference.

And if it’s relevant, try to end the journal with how you are going to address the urge (this only really applies if it stems from a need, i.e. needing sleep).

Stay strong man, I am praying that you make it through this night :pray:

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I’m on Day 2

Thanks @Special_Bird, I lost Saturday but yesterday I tried to observe the urge and immediately when I start to observe it, I found my hand trying to grab the phone without me deciding to do so. I was surprised with that behavior and more than that I actually can’t believe I was able to stop it, to let it be what it really is - weak. Really thanks again. I know this is far from over, and I’ll have to educate myself more to get over this.

I was not able to come to the forum for help, I’ll do so next time.
I’m feeling normal today.



Of course man! Despite the relapse, I’m grateful to hear my strategy is helping you!

Yes there is always more to learn, but you are making great steps in the right direction and figuring out what works for you, and that is most important.

Keep growing and keep fighting brother :facepunch: This is very good to hear :pray:


I like to have this here as a reminder.


Day 3

having urges right now.
last two hours.
it’s about lunch time now, I’m going to do that and then go out somewhere.



There are opportunities coming my way for my carrier and I have to sort them out, see the options and decide which one to go with, and I gotta make that decision with a clear, confident mind.


Back on Day 2 brother, you can recover from this. Keep the momentum going.

Onwards and upwards bro!

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Over the last seven days including today, I only have one clean day which was Saturday.