[18 M] Alphadude's Diary

Where there’s a will, there’s always a way!

My 4 step process to get rid of any addiction!

  • 1) Analyse the root cause: Meditate for 30 min everyday, and spend some time introspecting yourself alone, why you’re doing something out of compulsion, what are the factors, is it something in the environment or some emotional thought or trigger etc.
  • 2) Analyse all your past relapses and mistakes: List down all your past relapses when and what date it happened and write the reasons for it. Note the vulnerable time period, situation and emotions you felt as well before and after relapsing.
  • 3) Make voluntary changes in your lifestyle: This is the hardest part. You have to get outside your comfort zone and do something to completely wipe out your root cause. If this does not happen, it does not matter if you’re on day 30, 60 etc. you’ll end up relapsing.
  • 4) Enjoy your life under your control! : After the root cause is eliminated, you’re free from your addiction and have no desire to indulge in it automatically.

Example: For me the root cause was that I used to get anxiety attacks in the form of heart palpitations around day 15-30. In order to relieve the uncomfortable feeling, I used to end up relapsing. So I found a method to reduce anxiety by researching on various techniques like running, yoga, aerobic exercises etc. I do cardio whenever I get a urge that induces increased heart rate.

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Well I tried this method and thought this to be effective in stop this addiction, but it back fired on me …

As I had no access to P during my easy mode , I often did MO by just fantasising… And I was able to go 17 days without P , but as my brain become bored of fapping to same fantasies , the urges became difficult to control and I relapsed around day 20 using P…

This method is good , but it has very less long term benefits … Anyways All the best if you want to try this…

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Ok I’ll see how it goes. I’m doing this to disconnect the relation between MO and P in my brain as according to EasyPeasy they both are closely interwired.

P is the main root cause of the problem, so stopping it much before stopping MO is what I’m trying right now.

Even though I won’t get quick benefits but atleast I’m avoiding that unnecessary binge relapse phase with P after long streaks of complete abstinence.
After 3 weeks the little monster will die out which will make my journey easier next month when I quit MO as well.

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It is great that you try different approach to fight the addiction keep up trying things and maybe even enjoy the different approaches make it a fun exploration:)

I am have had the SE experience as @Kai did.
Additionaly to that i noticed that during M I could not O without the P … So I got even more frustrated and broke the streak eventually…
And another thought an issue with M is the tendency to radicalize, this is by far not was bad as it is with P but our brain always tries to get new stimuli when M so maybe you can try to search for stimuli that Kean toward health relationships and sexual encounters to avoid searching for P that helped me for a while…
I imagined romance stories etc…
But at some point that to Led to P…
I personally came to the conclusion that i lack the will power to go with easy mode… And that it is easier for me to stay completely away from PMO. One of the biggest reasons was the amount of time I invested in PMO… It currently takes some time to do my healthy habits like diary writing poetry and exercise but they also have some benefits.

I wish you the very best and hope that this helped in any way!

Keep that streak gooing and fight the good fight
Bests

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10 Nov 2021

  • :white_check_mark: Equilibrium 25 ques
  • Gravitation 25 ques
  • Anatomy 25 ques
  • :white_check_mark: Chest and back workout (dumbells)
  • :white_check_mark: No TV or youtube
  • :white_check_mark: Minimal social media usage
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sounds like a day of good work :slight_smile: well done m8!!!
keep it up and celebrate that success.
bests

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11 Nov 2021

  • :white_check_mark: Anatomy 50 ques
  • :white_check_mark: Cell 30 ques
  • :white_check_mark: Gravitation 25 ques
  • :white_check_mark: Pull-ups workout
  • :white_check_mark: Posture correction routine
  • :white_check_mark: No TV or youtube
  • :white_check_mark: Minimal social media usage

My main goal is to get into my dream medical college KGMU, Lucknow in Uttar Pradesh. It’s one of the best in India even though AIIMS is on top.

I need to score atleast above 600/720 in NEET 2022 to do this. With hardwork and consistency, nothing is impossible.

After 5 years MBBS in India, I’ll aim for getting a postgraduate degree in medicine abroad from USA or UK and work there as a doctor.

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Bruh you are from India? I thought you were from some other country as time on your profile is different :sweat_smile:

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Ya I live in Kuwait right now. I’m Indian but born and raised up in Kuwait. So basically you can say I look more like an arab person😄
Theres time difference of 2hrs between us.

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great goals!

best of luck achieveing them :wink:
and great routine!

keep up the streak!
bests

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Oh ok ok :sweat_smile:.

2.5 hours

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12 Nov 2021

  • :white_check_mark: Gravitation 25 ques
  • :white_check_mark: Botany NCERT
  • Solid mechanics 25 ques
  • :white_check_mark: Cold shower
  • :white_check_mark: Abs workout
  • :white_check_mark: No TV or youtube
  • :white_check_mark: Minimal social media usage
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Damn looks like a great day!
Congrats

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I regret to inform that I’ve relapsed.
The combined pressure of online coaching and staying home alone had caught me off guard.
As Kai and SirTryHard have previously stated that this Easymode has no long-term benefits and I truly agree with that. I’ve decided to go full Hardmode from today 14 Nov onwards.

The thing is that my MOing frequency had decreased a lot that I didn’t even do it for every 2-3 days. Not only me, but even my brain was convinced that masturbation is not pleasurable, as a result of which I was forced to switch to complete abstinence. However not choosing to follow that path, and continuing with Easymode used excessive willpower on making a decision between using phone for MO or not using it at all. This eventually led to a tug of war, resulting in a relapse.

So I’ll list down that pros and cons of this method after following it for almost a week:-

Pros

  • Good for focus and productivity in short term due consistent low sex drive.
  • You and brain as well stop finding MO pleasurable and but if you don’t switch to Hardmode soon enough, relapse chances are high as your brain develops tolerance.
  • Guilt experienced is less than PMO.
  • Nearly similar benefits like Hardmode.

Cons

  • Requires lot of willpower, even more if you exercise regularly.
  • Sweaty palms for some reason.
  • Motivation to exercise is less.
  • The feeling of being deprived is buried deep inside the limbic system.

As you already know, the consequences of relapsing is always detrimental. I couldn’t focus on solving phy or chem ques at all. So I stuck to just reading my bio class notes.

1 big lesson also learnt is that never expose yourself to psychological triggers. Most notorious ones are staying alone, or just plainly boredom.
Initially I thought that exposing myself like that would develop some resistance and help rewire my brain but no, it just makes urges last way longer. Only after 90-100 days I can say I’m rebooted, not anytime before that.

I’ve also discovered my method to become a productive monster. To be able to study long hours… you need actually enjoy studying!!! To be able to accomplish this is to find your own strategy to beat tests and exams. For me, it’s to maximize the time I solve numericals and minimize time I read theory.
Secondly, you will have to cut down your sources of mindless entertainment as it’s distracting you from your dreams. I stopped watching TV, youtube and reduced my time on Insta and it helped a lot.

Hope this helps for the rebooters out there.
I’ll come back stronger this time.

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Easy peasy also mentions this, orgasms make you lethargic and hence you tend to stay away from hard tasks so in my opinion we should be aiming to give up, P or M or O altogether.

Bruh these situations are bound to happen sometime right? But yeah I agree don’t choose them on your own.

Agreed my focus deteriorates for 2-3 days altogether, most of my studies are reading formula notes and solving problems.

Yess yess, absolutely, whenever I am in formula notes reading phase of a subject I tend to shirk away from it, but while solving questions and giving tests I easily study for long hours, I have to find a way to read the formula notes as fast as possible, maybe I’ll just read them in the morning as fast as possible and switch to problem solving for rest of the day.

:fire::100:

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That’s a good idea, I’ll also plan to revise all formulae every morning before starting the questions👍

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heya sorry to hear your relapsed glad to read you leanred from this!

avoiding these circumstances is good but as @The_integrous_one pointded out they are bound to happen it might help you to think of strategies for each dificutl triger situation so you can deal with it in a healthy manner. it would be best if you leanred to actuallay disarm the sitauations and make them less stressfull/boring alltogether but that is a lengthy process and you ahve a great pace!

with this i strongly disagree!!!
you still have mid fog and issues with disciplione specially this:

is the issues for self discipline an issue with PMO is that you forget how to deal with difficulties and as long as you use any kind of PMO as a coping mechanism your brian does not get used to live without it…
that is a major drawrback of that mode!! in my espeirence the “easy mode” only helps if you want to start with nofap… as you yourelf stated it helps you see that you do not actually like PMO to much

only hard mode gets your brain rewired… everything els eis short term. it was fun to read hwo you analized the situation great work!

best regards keep up that streak!

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Thanks for this idea. Yes this entire process is very long, and does indeed require patience.

Even though quitting pmo is easypeasy, the healing requires lot of effort. Even the person who reached 1000 days stated that this journey does require willpower and patience.

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Yes, that’s where the actual game lies.
You brain flashes all those scenes and everything everytime it is rewiring back to normal, it’s the hardest part of rebooting because it’s quite easy to give in to those temptations when they are being constantly flashed in front of you.

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Ya, I think I developed a religious approach to deal with this. When something like this happens, I tell to myself-
I’m one of the righteous people and won’t burn like them in hell and burn there forever. They are just enjoying temporary worldly desires which is absolutely negligible to the permanent happiness I will have when I enter heaven.

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