I was doing good awhile back. I had an 18 day steak. I felt I had it under control. Then I relapsed. And again. And again and again and again…now I am here. A month later, maybe two, I have not had a steak better than 2 days. Ugh, complete frustration. I really started trying to stop because I am stuck on this terrible fetish. I know, I know, some people think fetishes are ok, blah, blah, blah. But this one is baaaad. It is not just embarrassing or something. It TERRIFIES me. Yeah, that bad. However, I felt under control, I even felt that maybe I could get over it, when I was on my big streak. Now, I can barely go 3 minutes of my life without having thoughts of this fetish. I HATE it. AHHHHHHHHHHHH ← that is how I feel right now. This app has just become a place to log my relapses by habit. I try, but I can’t stop myself from relapsing. I don’t know if I am being repetitive or not, but if I am…it is because this whole thing feels repetitive. Over and over, same things, same thoughts, same relapse. I am simply sick of all of this. If you got any direction for me to take I would be SO grateful.
Help me please