A few weeks back I noticed my mental health was deteriorating despite making positive changes, for a long time I wasn’t sure why I was feeling this way, until the last relapse I had, like many times before I had hit rock bottom again being in this post nut state I connected the dots and realized the reason I was feeling down and depressed was because I started using social media again.
I installed Facebook, Instagram, and snapchat a few months back thinking I could take responsibility and limit my time on the apps, in the beginning everything seemed fine, but then I started using it more and more, I found the more I would go on social media the more bored and insecure I would feel about myself, whenever I was on social media I would constantly be checking for likes and comments, but the more I checked it the more insecure I was feeling, it started to affect my self esteem, and my social anxiety that I had in my teens started to creep, I began avoid people, I felt like locking myself in my room, I would still go to the gym, but when I was there I would feel so insecure that I felt like everyone there was being judgemental when they weren’t, I was scared of coming out of my shell.
I continued to get on with my life despite feeling empty and insecure, it felt like every person not just people in the gym, people everywhere were being judgemental and watching my every little move, making me even more insecure, then one day I was in my binging on PMO and I finally realized why I felt like this, when I was on social media I was getting the same dopamine high as I would when on PMO which explains why I was feeling insecure and anxiety. I uninstalled all of social media except for messenger and snapchat, and stayed at home for a few days to recover and work on my mental health, after a few days I started going to the gym again and my insecurity started to decrease. It goes to show what social media can really do to people.
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Have pride and give yourself a pat on the back for even realizing and coming to the realization that social media is bad. Because people are out here walking around like drug addicted zombies because of social media. I swear i see people with there eyes a few inches away from there phone just mindlessly scrolling and somehow they don’t see a problem with it all.
I might have a severe pmo addiction but can gladly say ive never been invested and addicted to social media (Maybe youtube , But at least you can learn) and not some quick few seconds of shitty content
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