Remaking myself with Allah's Help - 1 Year Change

Day 10 Completed

The Fire of Life :fire:

I’m feeling fire :fire:(horny) in my balls but Im not bothered by it. The fire during and leading to orgasm is like a scorching furnace. But this fire is like a candle. I’ve used to going to and fro from the unlit candle and the furnace all my life. The candle fire at first sight seems unbearable. But give it time, and I won’t even notice its presence.

It must keep burning so I may shine. The fire, It is life. It’s an all healing elixr. I just not waste this fire and seed.I must not relapse.

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Day 11 Completed

I slept in the afternoon and during my sleep and wakefulness, I had this most powerful desire to masturbate. It was my subconscious desire waking up as I slept. I think it’s an outlet for all my repressed sexual and pornographic desires.

The thought to get up from my bed and go to the washroom to masturbate lingered in my brain. But it was just a thought, albeit a powerful one. There was no action as I was half asleep and half awake. As I came to wakefulness, I noticed that desire going back into the shadows of my subconsciousness and I thanked that the urges were subconscious only.

I don’t know what to make of it. Have you had any similar experience? Any tips? I need advice

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Day 12 Completed

I felt relieved after my wet dream. The fire in my balls is not that irritating anymore. And to be honest, I enjoyed the natural relief of orgasm. I am calm now. And this calmness is another reason for me to reject masturbation. Wetdream is natural to human body but masturbation is not.

The body knows when to release excess sperms and it does its job well. So you don’t need to masturbate to relieve yourself. Your body will do that for you. Provided you don’t inflame your hormones by peeking and watching porn, then masturbation is only for excessive pleasure. Give body its rest, guard your eyes. Then masturbation will not be a need or a want. Don’t even desire wet dreams, sometimes they don’t come when you want them to, thus making you prone to relapse.

After 12 days, I am calm and I think I can do another round till my hormones peak and my fire bursts. I just have to learn to endure these sensations. For when they become maxed out, surely they will fall back to normal. Either by Wetdream or by semen being absorbed back.

I’ll go win a few rounds, and then I’ll be used to handling urges and hormones. I’ll be truely free of this bad habit of PMO.

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Day 13 Completed

PMO is a bad habit. To break this bad habit, I must also stop things associated with it. And do things opposite to it. I need to form good habits to replace the old bad ones. Otherwise it won’t work.

Bad habit:
PMO

Associated habits:
Screen addiction, Binge eating bad foods, Not working hard on studies, Procrastination, Laziness, pleasure orientation, no sleep routine

Good habits:
No screen entertainment, Book reading, meditation, eat healthy, work hard on studies, exercise, Be busy, hardwork orientation, good sleep

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Awesome man , just went through all your posts and you are a real motivation… Keep going.

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@Kai brother thanks a lot :grinning_face_with_smiling_eyes: May your wishes and dreams come true. :sparkles:

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Day 14 Completed

No magic will happen on day 90 or day 180.
Only the hard work I put into my good replacement habits will change me for the better.
I will make each day count and sleep with satisfaction in my heart saying "Today was an awesome day :grin:"

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Day 15 Completed

I’ve wasted my entire life perusing instant gratification on the cost of my future. I’ve wasted my energy and time. I’ve wasted my years. I could have become an awesome person with amazing qualities in my arsenal. I’ve been a spectator to my life, watching an unfortunate set of events of self destructive nature. I could have been the hero of my own life.

That’s it!. Today is day 15 since I decided to change my fate. Today is the first day of the rest of my life. I will pick up the pen given to me that writes my destiny and write the most awesome, most adventurous and the most awe-inspiring story. The past may be gone but I always have my present, the pen that writes my future. It’s time to be the HERO of my own story. Time to GEAR UP!

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How I REACHED 101 DAYS of NoPMO in my past

These are some points I have learned in my journey when I reached 101 days of no PMO

POINT 1. Learn to automatically divert your eyes away from triggers. Maybe you dont want to stop using youtube or watch a movie, Ok no problem. But you need to train your mind and eyes to not check out the opposite gender and only look at their face. By following this, you will get expert in dealing with popups and surprise triggers.

But If you are early in your noPMO journey then its better to avoid all triggers. Go on a dopamine fast (no dopamine and entertainment from screen). Just avoid visual and auditory i.e. ALL TRIGGER. Stay the hell away from screen, social media and movies (also series and animes). Don’t check out girls or opposite gender.

POINT 2. Stay busy to defeat physical urges. Don’t fight the urges, it will get powerful if we concentrate on it. Staying busy is the ultimate weapon to defeat horniness. Staying busy for a lifelong goal and dream is better. Follow a routine. Don’t divert from it.

POINT 3. Never fantasize. If a sexual thought comes, just focus on something else. It just takes 5 seconds to redirect to a new thought. Entertaining a thought will increase its power and make you more horny and create powerful urges. So focus on something else.

POINT 4. Don’t touch your privates ever. Don’t put your hands in the pants. NO Touching!!!

POINT 5. Remember your horrible feelings after EVERY. SINGLE. RELAPSE!!!. Remember all the time you wasted, all the opportunities you missed, all the life changing decisions you made wrong due to this addiction!. Think how awesome your life would be without PMO. Think how happy you will be when you become better and better everyday never stop improving. No porn will satisfy you. No masturbation will make you happy. PMO will not decrease your stress. It will not relax you. You don’t need PMO to feel good. You don’t want PMO anymore. YOU ARE NOT ATTRACTED BY PMO ANYMORE. YOU VIEW PMO AS DISGUSTING, HORRIBLE AND VOMIT PRODUCING. YOUR PAST IS PAST. NOW YOU ARE A NEW AND BETTER PERSON. AND YOU WILL NEVER EVER GO BACK TO THAT CRAP!!!.

After breaking from the conscious mental attraction of PMO, now just take a cold shower or put cold water on your privates (if you know for sure you won’t touch yourself). Then stay busy in your task. Or take a walk, socialize, eat or drink something and exercise.

Practice these 5 points. Make it a habit and you will NEVER relapse!!!

Congratulations, you just avoided and defused a relapse. You are getting better at this. SOON , YOU WILL ACHIEVE HIGHER STREAKS AND BREAK FREE !!!. MAN, YOU are SIMPLY AWESOME :fire::fire::fire:

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THIS WILL GIVE YOU HOPE I PROMISE :grinning_face_with_smiling_eyes:

Copied from 365 Days with self discipline

On the Importance of Habits

Success is actually a short race — a sprint fueled by discipline just long enough for habit to kick in and take over.
—Gary Keller 20

Habits are like magical powers. The moment they kick in, you no longer need more than perhaps a modicum of self-discipline every now and then to continue performing the same action on a regular basis. What originally was extremely difficult to do is now something you largely do automatically, with little thought or willpower.
When something becomes a part of your routine, resistance drops to nearly zero. The challenging part is forming a new habit. Research suggests that it takes anywhere from 18 to 254 days 21 to form a new habit, with 66 days being the average time (not 21 days, as the common knowledge goes). When working on your goals, remind yourself that it’s the first months that will be the hardest. Once the proper habits kick in, things will get easier.

Remember that in the long term, only habits — and their subsequent permanent changes in lifestyle and identity— can ensure lasting success. Consequently, it’s key to think in terms of lifelong routines .

As long as you’re jumping from one two-week diet to another instead of establishing new nutritional habits, you’re destined to regain weight. As long as you’re switching between different six-week workout programs to lose some weight — and not thinking of exercise as a permanent part of your weekly routine — sooner or later, you’ll revert to inactivity.

Analyze your goals and assess whether your plans employ self-discipline to help you build a habit or if you’re using self-control as a means of temporarily sustaining an impermanent change.

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Day 16 Completed

Discomfort is a sign that you are at the edge of your comfort zone and you are crossing into the zone of growth and improvement. Start seeking discomfort. 15 push-ups is your limit?, do 3 more. Studying 1 page is your focus limit?, force yourself to read 2 pages. Soon you will be comfortable with 18 push-ups and reading 2 pages. Now, it’s time to move out into the zone of growth again. Never stop improving. Love hardship and pain. These are your true friends.

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Day 17 Completed

2 things that are helping me most are

  1. No Screen entertainment ( not even any social media) except on Sunday when I watch one or 2 anime episodes.
  2. Self talk in morning about my goals and also about how I can avoid relapses today like guarding my eyes, thoughts and actions. I motivate myself. I also plan my whole day.
    Also, at noon I self talk again but this time I scan my body and brain for signs of dangers.eg am I feeling horny? Is this due to wanting to urinate?, or tiredness or lack of sleep?, am I craving dopamine? What will be my relapse prevention strategy?, any danger today and what will I do?

These definitely help me a ton. I guarantee, follow this and you will achieve higher streaks in no time.

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Day 18 Completed

Building a habit takes consistency. I’m feeling resistance, lack of motivation and sadness while I try to build a new habit of studying consistently. It’s difficult because I haven’t spent time studying for half an year now. I’ve spend 6 to 8 hours daily in front of a screen watching TV series and movies. Maybe that’s why the resistance is greater. Looks like I haven’t used my brain for a while.

Anyways, today marks day 3 of serious study of 3 to 4 hours. I am willing to feel discomfort and depression while I build this habit. But soon, all this resistance will vanish. I’ll soon enjoy my new routine and studying for long durations and soon I will reap rewards of my self discipline in terms of personal growth and exam results.
Thankyou everyone for liking my posts as I feel Ive got an audience. @Kai @the_resilient_one @_TIGER @Yash21

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Day 19 Completed

Today was a good day :blush:. I studied 70% compared to other days as planned and enjoyed the rest of the day. Today was my break day where I enjoy and don’t study like other 6 days in a week. I enjoyed the company of my friends. We went out to eat and had fun. Life seems good with the company of good friends. I laughed at their jokes, and also listened and took part in some deep and passionate discussions.

We often forget having fun in our rewiring process. We forget that socializing and having genuine fun is something that helps heal us faster. It helps us to survive our painful transformation.

Loneliness drives us into this bad habit and socializing will get us out of it.

So enjoy your life now and then. Take a break. Laugh. Life is beautiful :blush:.

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Day 20 Completed

I feel happy reaching 20 days :grinning_face_with_smiling_eyes:. I feel more free from my bad habit of PMO as my positive habits and patterns grow stronger. I feel alive.

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I wont use the word addiction anymore for PMO

I’m not only counting these days but also making these days count. I think their quality is getting better and better. If I keep improving everyday then I’ll form such strong positive habits that will surely overpower PMO habit. I’ll be free. And I’m not using the word addiction for PMO. Addiction means I’m still enslaved to PMO. I’m not a slave anymore. PMO is just a bad habit. I need to break this habit and keep replacing it with good ones. I’m free. Im free to make positive choices under then influence of triggers. Normal people feel horny. They feel horny when they look at opposite gender.

I’ll still be a man after 2 years of PMO free and still feel horny after seeing women. What matters is what I do when I’m horny. And that depends on my habit.

So, I’m not addicted to PMO anymore. It’s just a bad habit I need to break and keep making the right choice for the rest of my life. I will never think I’m free of danger. Even after 2 years of no PMO, I’ll have choice to fap and a choice to not fap. It’s natural desires I need to learn to control.

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Day 21 Completed

How I survived today, the most difficult day yet - Day 21

I successfully defeated raw sexual mental urges today. Those urges that don’t let you study. Those urges that are present even in the absence of triggers. Even though I was physically not very horny, but I had strong desires all day that challenged my willpower and decision to quit PMO.
The strategy that proved useful was

  1. I affirmed myself that this is just a feeling. It has no power over me. I can still function and study if I will.
  2. I just focused on my studies and kept myself busy. At noon, I just slept fighting off the urges. Then at evening, I focused on my tasks and did not panicked at the strength of the urges.

I have securely survived today. All I have is this moment. Tomorrow if the urges come again, its no issue, I only have to face urges one day at a time.

Soon, dealing with the natural desires will become a habit and it will take less willpower. I believe due to PMO, I haven’t dealt with these primal urges and because of my inexperience and lack of practice, it’s causing me problem. It’s not a addiction. These urges are not a sign of addiction. Even after 2 years I will feel sexual urges because I’ll still be a human being. It’s just a matter of habit and principles.

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Every time you overcome urges…

The following extract really resonates with facing urges and triggers and the attitude required.

From the book- 365 Days with Self Discipline

“I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.” (…) You must do the thing you think you cannot do.
—Eleanor Roosevelt 45
Self-discipline is a lot like dealing with fear. When you face temptations, look them straight in the eye and send them packing, the next time they appear in your life, you’ll be able to say to yourself, “I managed to overcome them once. I can handle them this time as well.”
The more times you successfully overcome the temptations, the easier it will be to handle them again. Regular practice will make you less susceptible to temptations and even more likely to ignore them.

P.S. this is meant for urges that naturally come, so don’t willingly test your willpower and don’t put yourself in danger of triggers, it’s always a bad choice. But if urges come, just say to yourself that you have faced this before successfully and you can live another day successfully overpowering urges.

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A very important point to remember. Its equally important. Thanks for mentioning it as well!

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