Work on yourself, for yourself, every day. I don’t know where I read this but it stuck with me & I have been on a journey of abandoning bad habits ever since. Yes, I have adopted so many good habits over the course but getting rid of bad ones is something we all struggle with.
I started with abandoning social-media. Being an IT guy I was everywhere. I was disgusted with myself, posting sugar-coated stuff & craving for social validation. I have a very low level of self-control when it comes to these things so I just pulled the plug. Sure I could have scaled-down my social media usage or at least stuck with a single social network but I don’t like half measures. Changed password to something long enough so I won’t be able to recall it & deleted everything. Now I couldn’t revive them even if I wanted to. It has been four years now (about to be 5) & I haven’t used anything.
During my graduation days, I became a chain smoker because of the friend circle & the stress of the curriculum. I was smoking more than a pack every day. Quitting social media felt soo good (I was on a 1.5-year streak) so I decided that it was time to get rid of one more bad habit. I was smoking for over three years by then so yes I was addicted to it. But I had the confidence from previous success. Again I didn’t go the easy route & went full cold turkey. This was way harder than my previous experience. I had problems sleeping. Cravings were super bad. Anxiety introduced it self. The trick was always to resort for solutions instead of relapsing. I started drinking more water. Started meditation. Started running everyday. Luckily, the college was finished so the friend circle wasn’t around anymore & I had to change the city for work. All the triggers that would have pushed me to smoke again weren’t there. I did not lose my streak even once. I still can’t believe how I was able to do it. I genuinely believe that changing the environment attributed at least 70% towards it. I have been to few get-togethers with friends ever since but I did not relapse. The advice I received from Atomic Habits by James Clear got me through. I don’t associate smoking with my identity anymore. There have been times where I would have a dream where I’m smoking & then I wake up suddenly feeling guilty & bad and then when I realise it was a dream I get that feeling of relief. I’m still afraid that if I break the streak I will start doing it again. Streaks work, they really do.
So, now I’m here. This is a new journey for me. I don’t masturbate every day but I do get the craving once or twice a week. I don’t like how it clouds my mind & it’s about time I do something about it.
Yes, again, I will not be setting any small milestones. That’s just not me. I’m going kitchen-sink once again. I have already prepared, done some research, installed some tools etc to increase the friction. I don’t think it will be easy but I’m committed to making the change & that’s why I’m writing this post. For accountability. I hope this community will be a source of inspiration when the urge comes back. If you have any advice or tips for me, please do reach out. I hope you all are doing well in this weird time. Stay safe out there.