This thought helped me to get through tough time
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Need suggestionsā¦
I desperately want to leave my hostel.
As i am unable to study here.
Ragging is also a factor but that part i can handle. I know first few months were very good but after that everything changed
My main issue is that, its almost impossible for me to study in presence of other people. Thats the reason my syllabus is lagging a lotā¦ i havenāt completed any topic clearly till now
When i look at my friends how they are able to manage everything i feel very lowā¦
Thats the reason my addiction has got deeper to the point that im hopeless now. Im fapping literally everyday and i feel sad all the time. I have lost weight and my face became paleā¦
I have decided to rent and leave my phone for 1 month completely ā¦
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Is Ragging still there ?
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Yes bro.
We have to go through lots of stuff
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You can take a flat on rent in nearby apartments. I think that can help you.
Make sure the rented apartment has a balcony. Higher the floor, higher the impact
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I guess he will have added responsibility of some routine tasks in rented apartment. In university hostel, we get lot of facilities.
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Talk to your parents. Thatās the best thing you can do. Tell them you donāt want to be there.
Trust me in such cases they are the only people you can blindly rely on. Theyāll find a room for you too.
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But ragging and other stuff will be gone and heāll feel at ease due to it. Itās a good trade off. He can find a mess service for food and other things he can do by himself with a little planning.
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Some added expenses tho.
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So what? His mental health and studies are more important. Iām sure his parents would think the same. They wonāt hesitate for the added expenses. It doesnāt matter to them. Their childās wellbeing is more important than anything else.
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I am not sure what solution he tried till now. But he should try complaining or be in a group with machos to be safe.
If itās the routine ragging, maybe he can stand up for himself and see how things go.
Then only he should change places.
I donāt know the severity of the situation tho. I guess if bro was in my surrounding, I would have definitely stand up for him.
F bullies.
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You realize he said his studies are affected right?He isnāt even much concerned about ragging. Also āstanding upā sounds good while saying, you never know how badly it can escalate. I wonder if you have ever been in a hostel. I have lived that way and it wasnāt good. I wasnāt in the worst situation though, because I know things can get much worse especially for medical students.
Itās also better to avoid conflicts especially in a situation like this. Heās alone and he has other priorities. His studies are most important.
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I know you were emotional while writing this but projecting shouldnāt be done without knowledge.
I am currently in a hostel but the environment is pretty good, our university has strict laws for bullying and ragging.
I am not in a medical university tho.
Agreed.
If you are cornered, you need to be careful. Canāt fight a group alone thatās stupidity.
Can only work against routine bullies. But doesnāt he have friends? Who are with him?
I am an introvert too, but I have some bros who will stand by my side in such situations
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I wasnāt being emotional. But the way you spoke that he should āstand up for himselfā I found it a bit condescending. So I spoke it that way. The way you said āF bulliesā also made me question it, because I did think that you havenāt been in a helpless situation where you canāt do much. And Iām right in that sense. You may have been in a hostel but you havenāt been in a helpless situation.
Iāve had some (not too much) experience of that myself. Many seniors gang up on you alone. Never happened with me but I saw it happening to someone. We had strict laws here too, and we had police station close to my college but it still kinda happened a little. It just happens.
If you protest theyāll call you up separately and you can understand the rest. I donāt think situation has been this bad for @nofapstar123 either because today we have laws against such bullying but that doesnāt mean things canāt escalate. Iām a grown up guy now and I wouldnāt tolerate anything like this myself, as a matter of fact now if I find a senior I can definitely make him cry (I actually did it in my 2nd year too but when I was out of hostel and he tried to show dominance in college premises. I said it to his face - āapne baap ko boliyo aise mc mere samne aukad nahi teri. gnd maraā and he couldnāt do anything to me. We went to the teacherās cabin and I totally got him there and his face was funny)
But the question is about right now. He is already stressed about his studies. Maybe he doesnāt have friends. Maybe he does but isnāt comfortable with them (heās hinted at this actually) and he wants to get back on his feet.
The way I see this situation, he has got a limited amount of energy to spend and he can only afford to spend so much so he wouldnāt want to spend it on things other than studies (I donāt think you have this problem at all, do you now?) so he can barely manage. Being able to barely manage like this can have some severe long term consequences on mental health. Just saying that ādeal with itā doesnāt cut it.
Sometimes people need to be secure in one thing (in his case studies) to be able to deal with rest of the mess in their life. So my point is that if he makes it to 2nd year after scoring good in his subjects he will be able to do that too.
That being said, I donāt want to ruin his diary so Iāll leave it here now. @nofapstar123 if you want to listen to me, talk to your parents and let them know that you canāt take it anymore and get out of there. They are the only people you can trust, and Iām sure theyāll understand because you have been a good student as far as Iāve known you.
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Physically you can say yes. But as far as verbal bullying, I did stand up against boys of my own entire class except few. They respect me now.
If itās physical, I can understand he canāt do shit alone, he aināt a superhero.
He should tho, I doubt if he did or acted like scaredy cat in front of the bullies.
And in no way I am mocking him. Your body language matters. Itās just the truth.
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Bro really i think you are reading a lot of books about emotion. Thatās why you think like that.
Nah man, but the way he said, he looked so sure only to have made a terrible guess.
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Why do you think bullies in a hostel are successful in the first place? Have you watched the scene of Munna Bhai MBBS? Or 3 idiots? How they do it? They call you in a group and make you do stuff? Do you think body language even comes into the picture in here? It doesnāt have to be physical threat. They make you do stuff. Not so much now, and those movies are old too. But they still call you up in groups. This has happened where I stayed. They make use of the authority given to them by the teachers.
Also did you miss all of these things?
It wasnāt a sure guess, neither it was terrible. I was right in a sense that you havenāt been in a helpless situation, although you are technically in a hostel. I donāt want to make it personal here on this forum.
You actually remind me of me and my dad. I spoke in a similar cocky fashion like you. About traveling in trains and goons present there.
My dad was in navy and heās quite a badass on his own but he told me the same thing, that they got weapons (knife and stuff) and youāre basically helpless against those goons so mind your own business and donāt let it escalate. I was cocky because I didnāt know better. You seem no different than that.
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Hm, not like I care nor do I want you to admit. But thereās weight behind these words.
No man
I myself understood.
I am cool as long as you donāt get on my nerves which you didnāt. So good going. I just put forward my views and I did acknowledged he need to find good friends.
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Bhai tumhe kisi ka situation agar nhi pata he to uske samne me ye kar deta hun wo kar deta hun Gyan deke hero mat bano .
Uss din b tumne ase kuch galat word use karke gali Diya tha sabko 2024 last man standing challenge me .
Ye forum me tum kitna hero ho kisko ghanta fark nhi padta he.
Aur jo scaredy cat word use Kiya tumne kya ea sahi he??
Verbal bullying hamesha asa hi rehta he kya tumhare area me?? Hamare yahan kuch hi der me mar pit suru hojata he.
Tum chat me khud ko Jo itna strong hero dikha rhe ho kabhi yahan aoge to tumhari asi ragging karke dhajiya udaunga tumhe khud samjh nhi ayega. Hamesha dusro ki post me Jake ea kar dunga wo kar dunga me to asa hun ye dikhane ki jarurat nhi he .
Iss forum me har tarah ke log ate he koe tutke iss app me ata he kisi ko support chahiye hota he mujhe ase har message ata he koe depression me use karta he .tumhe pata he wo Banda type karte waqt ro ke type kar rha he ya wo thik he uss time??
Baki Raha ase badi badi battein bol rhe ho kya 100 days streak bana rhe ho iss baat ki ghamand he ya regular badge mila he? Wese highest streak kya he tumhara??na pehli bar nofap suru karke 100 din banaya he itna cruel jese batte karte ho??
Forum me mujhe ek msg v aya he ye princeking ase baat karta he khud screenshot dekho
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