Not troubled but i enjoy the real ■■■ dopamine. Its gives me a happy feeling which motivates me further.
Dont take it in wrong way. I dont keep watching asses like a pervert. Just a quick glance & thats it. Thank God and move on
Hi @Resurrection. This is very powerful advice you are giving here. I’m on my day 14 of NoFap/NoPMO and all this time I have been using a dating app to meet other guys (I’m gay). On this site there are a lot of relapse triggers, especially this one picture of a topless guy taking a selfie of himself which I have been staring at for an unhealthy long time.
After reading your opinion on admiring another person’s beauty, I realised that what I was doing while staring at this guys’ photo was pure lust, which I now like to think is “mental masturbation”. My brain was viewing him as the porn stars I’ve seen in porn. I now see that what I was doing was just being a pervert.
I almost relapsed a few minutes ago, but, what stopped me was this advice you are giving; that, “I thank god for giving me a chance to witness her beauty. Then, i move on with my business & forget her”. That’s why I say it’s really powerful. It’s taught me that it’s not right to fantasize about people in my mind, which I have been entertaining all this time. So, I have decided to delete the dating site because it is a hindrance to achieving my NoFap goals. And as you say, “NoFap teaches us that self-control”.
I hope to not go back to that dating site again. It is also almost as addictive as fapping or watching porn. But, what I will always remember is that I rather not install it again if I am serious about changing my life for the better, free of lust. Thanks for the advice.
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Today I gazed at my therapist for long enough to make me self-aware of what I was doing. Her legs were peeking from the blanket she was using on the couch. I spoke yesterday with a lady friend who is bad for me and that I consider a major warning to get my act together. I cut her out today. I watched a risque music video earlier tonight, I gotta watch it. Also I had a beer which i rarely do… it was a good break, gave me sufficient positive feelings to come out of my overthinking and when the negative slump came, I slept it off. But I want to be conscious to reality from hereon out, I’m at the 2 week mark and arousal is beginning to emerge. My goal now is to talk less and do more. Consume less and create more. Think less and do more. Feel less and simply be more.
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I don’t think it’s purely about urge control. Men are always weak to the opposite sex. My take is we are always denying it. My NOFAP rule is not just to control my urge while my eyes gaze enjoying the ‘natural’ view, but to be a proud gentleman.
Those views are beautiful no doubt, but I have greater sense of purpose in life than to waste it controlling my urge after enjoying the the view. You don’t have to fight the urge if you don’t see it. Normal civilians has no NOFAP life cause they were never so low into PMO. They are living their best lives.