English is not my mother tongue
I am stuck on something:
I want to buy a fake lady part that have realistic “downstairs” (as consumers/reviewers and seller claims), big enough, feel like realistic. But I am afraid that I am going to waste my money on it. Last time I bought a pocket p****, I was so addicted into it that I masturbated thrice a week until I was out of lube and dry F’ -ed it until it became useless. When I look at the model I wish to own, I’m concerned about the consequences of using it. Far worse than masturbating with my left hand, I have to thrust inside of that fake thing as If I am sharing a connection to nothing (makes sense?). Anyway when I researched the different types and prices, I decided to buy one product at a reasonable price because of my tight student budget.
The idea is that this products will also have a " lady backdoor" because a**l sex is very prohibited in my religion and because it’s despicable, i thought of trying it on something unrealistic. The other idea is to use it however I want and use my fantasy, but with a GO-version of the original product I want may not fulfil my lust.
Anyway it’s a dilemma. Either I fight PMO by hardly resisting it or masturbate while I metaphorically practice on it as long as I do not watch porn. The problem with abstaining from PMO is that now I relapse easily for very stupid reason unless I get the motivation back and faith that one day, I will escape from this addiction…
I don’t know what else to do. I have this product in the shopping list online along with a couple of accessories and ready to be bought. Or try my best to avoid that fake lady part.