Although my app says this is the 3rd day I am really on my 11day. I am currently doing hard mode. I have been doing this compulsive behavior since before I was 10 years old. I finnaly admitted I have a problem but quiting is so hard. I notice I use this a as a stress reliever and a coping mechanism. I have had a somewhat hard childhood so with no access to drugs this is what I came up with to relief stress without me really realizing it. Its very hard to quit. The craving for me sometimes last nearly the entire day and I can’t even focus on my classes. I am in college. I have a big test coming up and I don’t want to quit even doe it would help me study and it’s torchering me. Words of advice or encouragement would be great. Thank you
Hello friend,
I understand you , i can see myself in your story. To me, craving is a lie, it’s make you think that you need porn. It’s like someone inside you wants to keep you a slave by all means, even in making you believe fake things like " i need it " or " i’m sad / depressed" “i’m alone”.
I just relapsed yesterday , i made an experience with porn , i watched 3h of porn content but i said " what if i stay myself while watching this ? " I did , and you know what ? i wasn’t excited because i knew something in me was trying to make me excited but it wasn’t the case, it’s a bit exhausting to watch porn since it’s a violent content , in the end i hadn’t some power left to stay myself, then i ttransformed again in an animal or something. I needed 3h of porn content to relapse, not a small trigger, just because i was myself.
As you are saying , you used it as a stress reliever and a coping mechanism , that’s natural , no judgement.
If you want to quit , maybe try to find another stress reliever and coping mechanism , to me the best stress reliever is meditation or breathing , taking a moment for my self.
Coping mechanism ? believing in life and try to see EVERY event like something which will give you a lesson to know.
If you find replacement for stress reliever and coping , maybe you can try to be yourself , just , stop, feel your body and your spirit , deeply you don’t like it someone wants you to like it just to stay a slave.
(English is not my first language so sorry if there is some misunderstanding)