This month i fapped 3 time & fucked myself with my own hand. Now i am a completely a loser.
Last year on this month i got to know about nofap.I had saw worst days & best days of life during this nofap journey. I pushed myself upto 97 days once & 2 months streak twice. During that period i saw self-improvement in large scale but my regret is that i still crawl for porn & masturbation. My own mind tricked me to fap or my desires & fantasies. I always wanted to hit that legendary 1000 days but i failed even i couldnt reach 100 days. I cant break this masturbation cycle & masturbation directly leads to porn. Today i fapped twice i noticed that my legs were shaking. My body cannot tolerate such a damage & i am stupid to do it. I want to leave it behind in my entire life. People can notice energy levels of me due to i maintain minimum a week streak. I done of this.no more relapses. It is time for me to get mad on nofap. If my life improves if i quit my all sexual desires i am ready to do that this time.
you lived so many years with porn multiple times a week. if you say that you are shaking after a relapse why weren’t you crawling for the last few years?
yes you feel like crap after a relapse but that is to a large extend because you wanna feel like crap.
you said you reached nothing in this year?
is 1000 days the only time when you can say ypu reached something. isn’t it already an improvement if you fap less? how often did you fap in the last 3 months? how often did you fap in the 3 months one year ago, before nofap?
how much less is that?
You did not fully embrace the journey that’s why one part of you still wants the short term pleasure, if you come to peace with yourself you will have to sacrifice the pleaseure to get things done you simply cannot serve two masters, I know this from experience give up porn and rise above than thin fake reality embrace the pain for now if you want to change this