I’ve been trying to quit ■■■■ for two years but nothing works and it only gets worse. I used to think that one day I would get over myself, but now I think that this is for my whole life and I have no choice, because this addiction is stronger than common sense. And how to quit when your body says that it is cool and pleasant to do it? How to get pleasure from other aspects of life besides this addiction?
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The answer to this is very simple but to actually execute it, you need to be patient and have the actual belief in your process.
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if it were that simple, I would have overcome the addiction a long time ago. And others too
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Maybe it is simple, and we just aren’t seeing it.
You’ve written a good honest post, and I feel much the same at the moment - you should keep this thread going.
Why does it feel so difficult? And so easy to just go with the flow of it?
@JackWallery asking different questions, and phrasing things differently goes a long way.
We can pick at things and test what’s true or not
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When we were children, our parents had to tell us not to do certain things that we saw as pleasurable. We wanted to eat ice cream and cake for dinner, stay up all night watching cartoons, and play outside in dangerous situations.
As we grow older, we realise that our parents weren’t trying to be mean or ruin our fun; they loved us and had our best interests at heart. It isn’t good for us to do everything our hearts desire. Just because we think an activity would feel good doesn’t make it a good idea. A stolen candy bar tastes better than one you bought, but now you’re a shoplifter.
There are different kinds of pleasures in this world: natural pleasures and synthetic ones. Natural pleasures, like the taste of a healthy home-cooked meal, enjoying music, spending time with loved ones, and appreciating a walk in nature, give us good feelings without regret, shame, or guilt. We have happy memories afterwards.
As addicts, we become hooked on synthetic pleasures that are many times higher in pleasure-producing chemicals than normal, healthy activities. Pleasures like drugs, alcohol, unsafe sexual scenarios and, of course, pornography and masturbation. These pleasures reduce our appetite for healthy activities. They also leave us feeling empty and miserable once the pleasure high has passed. The good news is that with enough time in abstinence, our brains start to repair themselves, and we can once again experience pleasure from natural activities again.
Even though we experience negative consequences as a result of the addiction, our brains don’t see it that way. To the primitive brain, such an abundance of pleasure-producing chemicals can only ever be good. And thousands of years ago, it would have been right. We only got high dopamine levels after discovering a new food source to keep us from starving or reproducing with a mate to keep the human race going. Now, the brain believes that your pornography addiction is not only a good thing but that it is essential for your survival.
This is why addicts find it difficult to overcome their addictions. The brain has been confused by the abundance of false pleasure, and it is convinced that addiction is a life-or-death issue. The brain works against us. It does anything it can to get us to continue the addiction and keep a steady supply of dopamine. It can speak to us in our heads using our reading voice and pretends to be us. The thought will come, “I haven’t been on the Hub in a while; there’s probably an exciting new video on there,” but the thought wasn’t our own. It came from the brain, trying to tempt us to return. It can send us flashbacks of previous videos we’ve watched, make us aroused, and change our emotional state to one where we have given into temptation in the past. It does all this because it believes it’s saving us.
The good news is that it is simple to overcome. We are not our brains; we are the owners of our brains. We are the CEO at the top of the skyscraper, and the brain is our employees. We can always say no to the brain. Every single time. The CEO doesn’t have to bow down to the suggestions of his employees. We are always stronger than every single urge we get. The brain cannot make us relapse on its own; that’s why it has to send us urges and temptations. We have control over all voluntary actions - only we can decide to use our hands and physically click or tap on the search engine and bring up ■■■■ and masturbate to it. No amount of pleading from the brain can ever make that happen unless we decide to do so. There are many methods for dealing with urges, all with varying levels of difficulty, but they all work as long as we commit to using them every time we get urges.
The best method I’ve found involves understanding this separation between ourselves as the human, conscious entity, and the primitive brain. We can learn to override it easily and continue our lives as people who simply no longer PMO. Tens of thousands of people have used this method to quit addictions to drugs, alcohol, gambling, binge eating, and pornography. They are permanently free without difficulty managing the addiction. Here is a 30-minute video that explains the method and gives us the steps to break any addiction permanently:
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How strong is your addiction is the first question I would ask. Are you doing this daily and also how’s your lifestyle currently. Yeah ■■■■ addiction is tough but I might help with some advice since I haven’t watched it for a good amount of time nor have a wanting for it like I used to anymore. I struggle still with masturbation but am getting better at not doing it but I found overcoming ■■■■ first to be the first step to overcoming yourself. Trust me bro, do that and things will change, ■■■■ is like the seed of all evil and then you can cut the tree at the top masturbation.
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Well said about parents, when I already had an addiction I remembered my parents’ words that adult films are very harmful. I couldn’t believe it, now we have what we have.
And thanks for your advice and your tips, also I will definitely watch the video
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I don’t do it every day, somewhere twice or three times a week, but the problem is that one “session” lasts seven or eight hours in a row. I do this until I am completely exhausted. The addiction has been going on for eight years. Regarding my lifestyle, I am not interested in anything, in my free time I play computer games and watch movies. I feel and am fully aware that my apathy and lack of interest is caused by addiction and deterioration of the neurotransmitter background
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I’m going to start by saying that your entire mentality to tackling this addiction is wrong currently. But don’t worry, we’ve all been there because of the brainwashing.
As @Forerunner puts it aptly, this addiction is a results of multiple, repeated button presses on “GO”. But we only do this because your brain has been diverted in an attempt to grab your attention. It does all sorts of mental tricks and mumbo jumbo and hell, it does a good job. But it’s all tricks. The addiction is not stronger than common sense because YOU are in charge of your brain and ultimately, every single action you do. YOU decide what common sense means. YOU have a choice.
Stop. What do you mean “besides this addiction”? This addiction gives you no pleasure. You mean the few seconds, maybe even a minute of desperate escape from reality before it all comes crashing down that you once again failed yourself? Don’t even think for a second that PMO was ever pleasure, it was all a trick. It only did one thing for you and that is ruined your life. And why chase pleasure anyway? Does pleasure have your best interests at heart? Is that what you are really after?
I’m sure you’re at a low point in your life, but I think you need to take some time to think about what PMO has actually done to you. Reject the notion that it was anything ever beneficial, and then choose the “common sense” that doing it again is always a net loss. The rest of your life will follow suit.
We’ve all been at the bottom before. Don’t lose hope, because there genuinely is no other way but up.
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What baffles me is that those who have reached streaks like 100, 200, 300 days have also fallen at some point. Just that few have it under control and few fell so badly in chaser.
I have broken my 132 days streak too in the worst of ways.
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Would you say that your more addicted to ■■■■ or more to masturbating. I would start reading books so that you can concentrate on other stuff or get into something even if you find it boring at first. I would say go full cold turkey if your addicted to both ■■■■ and masturbation but some people find quitting one first better then the other follows depending the severity you may have to cut off ■■■■ first then masturbating. Since ■■■■ is what is also causing lots of issues in our lives and messing with our dopamine receptors and anxiety and stuff. Another thing is don’t be too hard on yourself, learn to forgive yourself because the more your greatful for this present moment you have the better it gets. Take a nice fresh breathe air outside if you can and try breathing exercises, try exercising it helps.
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Yeah, I’d like to have a girlfriend and stuff like that. My main goal is to feel happy again and enjoy normal things, which I haven’t been getting while I have this bad addiction
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Both equally.
Yes, I know that physical exercises help a lot, but I’m always too lazy to do it. Unfortunately, I’m always looking for easy pleasure, so my brain avoids hard things. And if I start to do it, I will give it up because it will become boring and not interesting. I have a problem with concentration. Yes, I know I need to pull myself together and work through the problem, but it’s so boring to my brain that I can’t continue for long
I have the worst addiction
6 to 8 + times everyday
Now i do relapse but less that 5 to 6 a week max
I know this is also more
But i m telling thats the max if i do
So itss not impossible
step 1
Why are u bending towards corn
Whats the reason that u need to seek dopamine through corn and m@$
My take - I used to relapse when i didnt achieve my goals because of which i used to feel anxiety and stress.
I was addicted to instant ratification like corn youtube etc so every moment of my awake life i needed constant stimulation of instant gratification
And hence when i would not get it from games i would look for it in youtube if mot there then corn and m@$
Another reason was fear of facing the reality
And also lack of motivation to work hard
Because why work hard for delayed gratifixation when u get instant gratification without working
This may sound simple but it took me two plus years to understand this
I inderstood that just abstaining from this and not working hard wont help
I needed to put in hard work and reduce my instant gratification for things to get better
So find ur why? - why do u need it
Step 2
Eliminate the sources of triggers
And i mean this
What ever the triggers are right them down and eliminate them
Reason : we start building a habit pattern where we get on the triggering substance(example social media) and again due to habit pattern when we see something triggering we end up relapsing
Step 3 : people tell to be busy and productive and i completely get why they tell this
But one point here is
Domt just over fill ur day with productive substance
Because when u over commit and under perform u feel bad about urself
Start making small changes and u will get there
Okay
This is something u have build over long years of hardwork( negative though)
So u just wont wake up one day and u wont need it
U have to get stronger and happier without that
Stay strong
U can do it
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Not being rude but if that’s the case then brother you’re just gonna fap every now and then. You’ll have the same 7-8 hours long binging sessions. And the longer you do the deeper and taboo stuff you’ll watch. From vanilla po*n to God knows what horrible most vile shit there possible is. YOU WILL watch it and just like that the cycle will repeat and repeat and repeat.
If I may say. I see my old self through you. Your posts resonates my past. I’d do good for a few days and suddenly out of no where I’d have relapsed but not just 1 time. I’d binge watch it and would relapse around multiple (6-7) times. 
But I changed my attitude, changed my whole life. Pushed past my limits. Accepted that I’m weak, Accepted that watching po*n doesn’t make you look cool or sigma. Infact it’s quite the opposite. I told myself how i have tortured my brain and body with the super stimulus without any consequences. I didn’t humiliate myself rather i was very much sympathetic to myself. The little I, used to be full of innocence. I made a resolution to become the same little kid who was naive. Although it’s impossible to undo the memories but at least I’m happy. Happy because I know I survived through it. It may have changed me alot but experience is life.
Started my journey back in 2019 when covid was fresh and since then now I can hold my head high with a big grin and say I’m happy. From being exactly like you to what I’m today.
You have all the much needed advices from everyone I’m just here to tell you, My past is you’re current state. And my present is a lot different filled with happiness and no longer anything related to po*n. You can change!!
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