How to get rid of porn and fapping

Hi everyone,
This is just a try for a new topic. I don’t know if it will work or not. :grinning:
The idea is:
Every new member will come to this forum with the same question.
I tried to quit porn and fapping for x years but it never worked out. How can i get rid of watching porn?

To guide our new members better (and that we don’t have to repeat our strategies over and over again :sweat_smile: ) I thought that we could make a topic where we write down (in short hand) what we are trying. No long explanation or comment on other peoples methods and only one post per person (if you find out something new you could either delete the old post or just update the old one.

(if this topic works out we could maybe ask @Taher if he could implement a sorting option for most liked or newest post to keep the overview)

What is better? Shall I update my post with your things you do or shall everyone write its own list? (I would say everyone posts his own complete list of things)

Example:
When an urge occurs

  • immediately stand up and walk around

Urge prevention

  • no phone on my desk
  • keeping a To-Do List (motivation to not watch porn and keeping me buzzy)
  • go through all the achieved To-Do-List points every evening (real reward, better than porn)
  • “do-nothing” meditation (one form of meditation)

Let me know your thoughts. Or hmmm maybe don’t. Otherwise we will have a spamed topic again :joy:
Just fill out the poll. If you find it good but would suggest a small change either write me a pm or reply your own list and add as a comment the suggested change

  • Good idea
  • Good but I would change it a bit
  • Don’t like it

0 voters

I would like to add something
When urge comes first thing to think is
Why i started it ? Do i want my previous shitty life? Remember the social akward moments and ask yourself is it worth it.

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If the urge is bad, cold shower and or pushups. If not i agree. Get up and walk.

It’s a great idea, how about a wiki with community sourced helps and tips?

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Yea, Today I thought a bit about this tread and found out that it is pretty unhandy to use like this.
I guess it would be a great idea to have a wiki for things like that.
Also for the tutorial video you once mentioned (how to use the app and forum)

We could continue to gather different strategies and in the end we could finagle them all into one wiki post.

So to everyone, write down everything that helped and just spamm this tread with it :smile:

2 Likes

oooookay everyone. Let this topic crash out of too many good ideas!!
Post ALL the things that help you stay sober

At the end we will gather all that in a wiki page accessible for everyone. Just post everything below

Could be anything from cold showers to any thinking process. Just comment

Here is a list of things (anyone who knows this quote gets a free hug).

1. Doing something else

Enter endless list of things. Reading. Writing. Listening to music. It really comes down to what your interests are. Might be good if it is only ONE thing, leaves it nice and simple and makes you learn how to concentrate without getting distracted. Especially exercising in any way is a good start, since it’s a simple motion you repeat (walking for example) and releases small portions of endorphine as well.

2. Get in contact with yourself

Meditation or self-reflection helps some people, but it is difficult and you need a lot of discipline.
This way you either do “nothing”, or you try to get in touch with your thoughs, find out what makes you think of PMO, why you feel that way etc.
Danger is that, if you are not disciplined enough, concentrating on what you feel in that very moment may actually make things worse and won’t prevent a relapse in that very moment, although it may have some impact on the long run.

3. Get in contact with others

Try to call a friend, write a post in the forum or a message to a companion, go out and make yourself engage in social activities. Remember the rat and the heroin induced water? The experiment where every rat, over time, chose heroine over water and overdosed?
Turns out the problem nullifies if you put more rats in the same cage. They don’t give a damn about the drug since they have what they replace with it otherwise: social interactions.

But, whatever you choose to do, it is important (IMO) that you don’t try to force yourself to ignore the urge by sheer willpower. It makes you just concentrate on it even more, but with the goal to not think those thoughts, which is near to impossible. On the other hand, if you are letting those thought into your mind but still try to do one of the above, it really makes you grow out of the urges.
The urge is not the thought itself. It is what the thought makes you feel and do.

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