Chapter 7: What Happens to You
I know how to tell you what happens to you before and after you watch pornography because I have experienced it myself.
This is what happens to you!
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First you begin by feeling a strong oppression which then pushes you to view these obscenities. It’s a kind of overwhelming sexual urge, like a desire to have sex. This often happens to you when you expose yourself to sexual images or sounds. Or when you indulge in impure fantasies based on videos or images you’ve already watched. Sometimes you feel this oppression without having watched impure scenes or listened to sexual sounds. It comes over you just like that with images that come to mind! You also feel this oppression the day after an impure dream. This means that while you were sleeping you have dreamed about sexual things, and when you wake up in the morning you start to feel a strong excitement that makes you want to act upon what you saw in your dream. It is as a result of this oppression that you watch pornography and practice masturbation.
Sometimes it’s just yourself watching it out of your own lust. Sometimes it’s just a simple thought going through your head that triggers these desires. -
While you feel this oppression, as long as you don’t look at pornography or an obscene image that will make you masturbate, you won’t feel very good and you won’t be so comfortable that it will bubble up inside you.
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While masturbating you feel pleasure as if you were with a partner.
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After doing all this, all the envy you had ends and it gives way to regret. You are going to delete these videos and your web browsing history.
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You feel dirty before the Lord. You are ashamed to approach God to ask for forgiveness so much that it is not the first time this has happened. Even when you ask for forgiveness, you always fall! You think that the Lord is tired of you and that He won’t forgive you anymore.
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Meanwhile guilt is eating away at you and you can’t pray.
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Satan takes this opportunity to say to you “You there! God can no longer forgive you”. This is a lie! God always forgives you when you regret having committed a bad act and ask for forgiveness. Our God never tires of forgiving us! His grace always overflows where our sins abound provided that we come to Him to ask for sincere forgiveness and make a firm resolution to forsake that sin. By the way, even God knows you are struggling! God does not condemn those who struggle, but rather He wants to help them win the battle. Only you must give Him a place in your heart for Him to act. You may think, "What is He waiting for to deliver me if He knows I am a captive? The question should not be directed to God, but to yourself, what effort are you making to be set free. Deliverance will not be served to you like a cake, you must stand up in prayer. It is not by complaining and blaming yourself every day that the Lord will deliver you. You will need to adopt certain attitudes and develop certain habits in order for the Lord to act on your behalf. My friend, after asking God for forgiveness, let us also have the strength to believe that He has forgiven us. No sin is greater than God’s love for you. Your sins are not too great to be forgiven. But God’s grace is not an excuse to sin voluntarily and say, "God is good anyway, I’ll just go and ask for forgiveness and that’s it. It is very bad way to know God, if Jesus Christ his Son by essence did not escape the whip, the punishment, the insults, on the Cross his nakedness was exposed publicly to save us, do you really think that you will escape the righteousness of God if you trample on his Grace? The Bible recommends that we consider God’s Love and Severity. His Goodness and Mercy should rather lead us to repentance and not to the practice of sin. (Titus 2:11-12).