Dan’s Diary [30M]
Current Self Image:
30 years old single male still struggling to make ends meet despite having potential. Addicted to smoking, laziness, PMO (all cheap sources of dopamine). At a stage in life where I’ve realised that only way out of this is through this and no going back to old ways. Uncomfortable will be the new norm.
Physical: 5’11 and 65 kg. Lean body with little muscle mass and pain and discomfort throughout body. Have been putting off taking good care of my body and today will be the day I start treating it well.
Mindset: Loser mindset where I’ve failed taking on a habit I know is self destructive. No self improvement and living life without earning every minute of it. Rely on cheap sources of dopamine to get daily satisfaction instead of putting efforts to improve and earning rest and food.
Spiritual: Lack of gratitude towards parents and the eternal source of energy. Limited myself to just enjoying this body and neglected sources of inspiration in my life.
Will make sure that I don’t waste any minute towards instant self gratification and instead use it to test my potential. I want to see what I am capable of. This Diary is my accountability partner. Will spend some time daily to reflect on the journey through this soulless existence to limitless possibilities.
Target Anchor Habits to replace this habit with new habits:
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Oxygenated mind and body are highest in pure energy: Smoking clouds judgement and ultimately will lead to weaker thoughts. [Day 0 onwards]
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Well fed body is a healthy body: Will reward every now and then with some outside food but will have to eliminate completely slowly [First 100 days: Max thrice a week] [100-200: Max twice a week] [200 onwards: No junk food. complete abstinence]
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Use it or lose it: Will start with stretching the body and making it ready for Exercise.
a. Stretching: Till day 7 (All body parts)
b. Yoga: Will start on Day 7 onwards (4x a week Minimum 30 mins)
c. Exercise: No Fixed regimen but this will be in addition to Yoga
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Well rested body is well rested mind: Will bring some predictability in daily life to reduce physical stress to body and ensure fixed times for eating, sleeping and other routine activities. Will start sleeping before 12 pm by Day 10 of NoFap.
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Mindfulness is key to staying focused and alert: Will start following Medito app and follow its instructions for meditation. Daily practice of Vipassana 15 mins Day 7 onwards.
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Daily reminder for Nofap and why I am doing this: Will read ‘EasyPeasy’ book and ‘Discipline is Destiny’ daily and share some useful insights on Daily Diary to fight Nofap and redirecting that energy to improving self.
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Day 1:
No Smoking: Failed
Exercise: Success
Meditation: Success
Book Reading for inspiration: Success
Don’t let one failure in your entire day overpower the successes of the day. Failure has that power to influence the day and it is this feeling which causes me to cope up with help of PMO. Learning to focus on the positives is crucial for success against PMO.
Learnings from the Book
- Easy Peasy Method
The true reason for failing to quit is the Fear of unknown. What would life be like without it. What if the benefits posted online are not true, etc, etc. This book is an eye opener and looking forward to apply the strategies to quit ■■■■. This book offers a different approach and that’s exactly what I’m looking for.
The old methods of motivating myself by reading ill effects, etc haven’t worked consistently for me. Sooner or later PMO catches me offguard and the chaser effect takes care of the rest putting days of hardwork in vain.
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Discipline is Destiny
a. Story of Hercules at the crossroads: Hercules was in self doubt and crisis. Hercules was alone, unknown and unsure just like all of us. At the road of divergence, was a beautiful godess who offerred him every temptation and the other road was a sterner godess who just offered rewards for hard work and made no promises about pleasures, etc
b. This moment is similar to dilemma we face and the crossroads we are at. Choice between vice and virtue. Easy and hard way. Well-trod path and the road less travelled. Without hesitation Hercules chose VIRTUE: Excellence (morally, physically and mentally)
c. 4 key components of virtue just like 4 directions on a compass to guide us and show us where we are and what is true:
a. Courage: Bravery, fortitude, honour and sacrifice
b. Temperance: Self control, moderation, composure, balance
c. Justice: Fairness, service, fellowship, goodness, kindness
d. Wisdom: Knowledge, Education, Truth, self-reflection, peace
d. Virtue is the door to good life full of honor, glory or excellence. Virtue is something we do and will require daily practice. Merely reading about it wont be of any help. The crossroads is a daily challenge and not a one time event and requires constant striving.
Will we be selfish or selfless? Brave or afraid? Strong or weak? Wise or stupid? Will we cultivate a good habit or a bad one? Courage or cowardice? The bliss of ignorance or the challenge of a new idea?
Stay the same . . . or grow?
The easy way or the right way?
I have made a choice to take the right way. Hope I have good wishes from my fellow fighters and the Almighty!
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RELAPSED.
As soon as I lost touch with my habits of reading and journalling, those thoughts gained strength and overpowered me.
Key is to keep watering these upward thoughts and slowly uprooting these downward thoughts.
Starting afresh
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