2023-12-29T05:20:00Z
Today I relapsed at night. Yes it’s bad.
The reason behind is unable to sleep. I thought to watch a movie but I didn’t find any good movie. I was thinking to talk to someone because I was feeling lonely but that time also no-one known available online here.
I tried alot struggling to sleep till late night 1am then when I was scrolling shots in YouTube suddenly I feel strong urges. I tried to stop it but eventually my belief wasn’t strong enough that I can stop myself from my own actions.
Tbh I have many friends here but still I feel lonely most of the times.
Someone said that stay busy that way your mind won’t wander anywhere. So, I made this schedule. Starting wasn’t good but rest of the time I think I should utilise it well.
Successfully completed
Not Completed
yet to do
half done
“My SCHEDULE” :
Wake up 5am
Brush your teeth 2 times
Affirmation
Gratitude
Workout
Hair Care
: Face wash after coming from outside/in night time before sleep
Body cream daily(rashes)
Meds with water (before food)
Breakfast compulsory
Meds with water (before food)
Book reading
Meds with water (before food)
Lunch
Meds with water (before food)
Dinner
Journaling
- Journaling I will try do everyday here.
I tried reading book today, I felt headache, unable to focus and feeling irritated. Yeah I do feel boring most of the times but still doing it. the side effects I felt that might be because of pmo.
Since I am Relapsing heavily I felt like I am feeling weak,& feeling so more fear than I use to feel before. I am feeling like my heart becoming weak day by day.
After a long time I feel good because I have taken step or action towards my life betterment.
I can’t be consistent in these habits because of circumstances changing soon but I will try to be consistent.