1. Have a healthier understanding of sex
Perhaps the biggest lie porn sells is that its fantasy world is filled with sex positivity: sexual education, more sex, better sex, etc. What it doesnât mention, however, is that the fantasy world it sells can warp sexual expectations in unhealthy ways.
Itâs no secret that porn is wildly unrealistic and often straight-up toxic, yet 1 in 4 young adults report believing that porn is the most helpful source to learn how to have sex, according to a 2021 study.
Another study indicated that young people often reported trying to copy porn in their own sexual encounters, and that the pressure to imitate porn was often an aspect of unhealthy relationships.2 Bottom line, porn isnât contributing to a healthy understanding of sex.
2. Porn can be habit-forming
Many porn consumers are surprised to find that porn can be incredibly difficult to quit. While most porn consumers are not addicts in a clinically diagnosable sense,3 many experts agree that pornography consumption is a behavior that can, in fact, qualify as an addiction in serious cases.
Regardless of whether someoneâs porn consumption is classified as an addiction, compulsion, or simply an unhealthy habit, quitting porn can be a difficult process. Even if it feels daunting, there is support out there, making quitting more possible than ever!
3. Habits and addiction can escalate
Research indicates that porn consumers can become desensitized to porn, often needing to consume more porn, more extreme forms of porn, or consume porn more often in order to get the same response they once did.
Over time, a porn consumerâs appetite can escalate to more hardcore versions just to achieve the same level of arousal. In fact one 2016 study, researchers found that 46.9% of respondents reported that, over time, they began watching pornography that had previously disinterested or even disgusted them.
4. Stop supporting an abusive industry
In the porn industry, there is virtually no way to guarantee that any piece of pornographic content is truly consensual, ethical, or even legal. The unfortunate truth is that the porn industry has an extensive history of profiting from nonconsensual content and abuse, even ignoring victimsâ pleas to remove abusive content.
Virtually every major porn site has had issues with nonconsensual content, abuse, or child sexual abuse material (aka âchild pornâ).
5. Form deeper connections
As human beings, we are hardwired for connection. These important connections with others, however, can be undermined when porn comes into the picture. Research indicates that consuming porn can normalize sexual objectification, which can have profound consequences in the ways porn consumers view and treat others.
The porn industry objectifies people and commoditizes sex, which can make it more difficult to develop intimate connections with real people. Disconnect from porn and connect with real people!
6. Have a healthier body image
The makeup, surgery, Photoshop, acting, and editing that go into porn give us an unrealistic view of the human body and sexuality.
In fact, research suggests that consuming porn can result in poorer body imageâboth for the consumers and for their partners.Donât buy into the unrealistic, airbrushed fantasies of porn. You deserve to feel confident in your skin rather than comparing yourself to impossible standards.
7. Invest in your relationships
As world-renowned relationship experts Drs. John and Julie Gottman wrote about porn, âIntimacy for couples is a source of connection and communication between two people. But when one person becomes accustomed to masturbating to porn, they are actually turning away from intimate interaction. [Additionally], when watching pornography the user is in total control of the sexual experience, in contrast to normal sex in which people are sharing control with the partner⊠In summary, we are led to unconditionally conclude that for many reasons, pornography poses a serious threat to couple intimacy and relationship harmony.â
One study showed that those who never viewed pornography reported higher relationship qualityâon every measureâthan those who viewed pornography alone.Staying away from porn is a great way to invest in your relationships.
8. Prevent sexual dysfunction
Interestingly enough, porn often leads to less sex and less satisfying sex.
Research routinely shows that compulsive pornography consumption is associated with sexual dysfunction for both men and women, difficulties with arousal and sexual performance,
and decreased sexual satisfaction. Doesnât sound very âpro-sex,â does it?
9. Help stop the demand for sex trafficking
Sex trafficking shares a variety of symbiotic connections to pornography. Even in the production of mainstream porn, sex trafficking can still occurâand it happens more often than most people think.
Trafficking is legally defined as a situation in which âa commercial sex act is induced by force, fraud, or coercion, or in which the person induced to perform such act has not attained 18 years of age.Manipulation and coercion are unfortunately common in the porn industry, which legally qualifies as sex trafficking.
Again, thereâs no viable way for a consumer to guarantee that the porn theyâre watching is truly consensual and free of abuse or coercion. As long as thereâs a demand for pornâespecially porn that is extreme, abusive, or degradingâthe porn industry will continue to exploit vulnerable people to meet that demand.
10. Porn glorifies sexual violence
According to a study that analyzed porn titles alone, 1 out of every 8 titles suggested to first-time users on porn sites described acts of sexual violence.
Research also suggests that as few as 1 in 3 and as many as 9 in 10 porn scenes contain physical violence or aggression.2829 Even more concerning is that 95% of the time, the targets of violence and aggression in porn appear to respond either neutrally or with pleasure, sending the message that sexual aggression is normal or even desirable.
11. Porn can fuel sexually violent behavior
So we know that porn glorifies violence, but research also indicates that pornâs sexually violent narratives can bleed into consumersâ attitudes and behaviors. In fact, research indicates that porn consumers are more likely to sexually objectify and dehumanize others,more likely to express an intent to rape, less likely to intervene during a sexual assault, more likely to victim-blame survivors of sexual assault, more likely to support violence against women, more likely to forward sexts without consent,and more likely to commit actual acts of sexual violence.
Saying no to porn and its problematic narratives helps to build a healthier world.
12. Stop perpetuating racism
Porn often depicts and profits from blatantly racist narratives. For example, a 2021 content analysis of more than 1,700 scenes from two of the worldâs most popular porn sites found that videos featuring Black people disproportionately emphasize violence and aggression, perpetuate harmful racist stereotypes, and often depict Black people as âworse than objects.
The porn industry often fetishizes race, reducing people of color to sexual categories that often focus on damaging stereotypes.
13. Live a more honest life
Many consumers conceal from their partner how much and what types of porn they are viewing. According to a 2017 study, women tend to significantly underestimate how much porn their male partners consume.
In fact, in this study none of the casually dating womenâzeroâreported that their partner consumed pornography daily or every other day, but 43% of casually dating men in the study reported this level of heavy porn consumption.49 Scholars have also noted that pornography concealment may influence the partnersâ sense of trustworthiness and security in the relationship.
Healthy relationships are built on honesty and communication, so hiding a porn habit definitely doesnât help. And heyâyou donât have to clear porn from your browser history if you donât watch porn.
14. Free up some time
You may have noticed that consuming porn can take up a lot of your timeâscrolling from page to page, switching between videos. Aside from all its negative effects, time spent watching porn is time that could be spent developing your hobbies, achieving your goals, or nurturing your relationships with others.
Itâs estimated that over the course of their life, the average person spends about 3 months on the toilet, 4 months in traffic, and 9 years on their phone. How much of your life will you spend watching porn? Will it be worth it?
15. Focus on real relationships
In porn, everything from the way people look to how and why they have sex is fake.
Porn consumers can become so preoccupied with chasing something that isnât real that they miss out on actual relationships. In fact, people who view porn regularly are less likely to get married than those who do not. Researchers suggest this may be because consumers see porn as a substitute for sexual gratification in a relationship.
16. Avoid hurting your partners
Over the years, we have received countless messages from partners of porn consumers who feel deeply hurt by their partnersâ porn habits. Individuals who learn of their partnerâs porn habit often internalize their shame and confusion, asking themselves why they arenât enough.
Hundreds of studies show that porn can be toxic to relationships. Porn is not a harmless pastime, especially when itâs hurting a romantic partner. Itâs time to refocus on whatâs real.
17. Become a better parent
The harmful effects of porn donât always revolve around romantic partners. Weâve heard from many Fighters who have reached out to us telling how porn has harmed their family relationships. When consumers become engrossed enough in their porn habit, they can start to neglect important aspects of their lives, including family relationships.
Regardless, modeling healthy behaviorsâincluding not letting porn control your lifeâis an important part of being a secure parent. Help promote a healthy lifestyle for you and your family.
18. Become a better friend
Again, for consumers who become wrapped up enough in their porn habit, they can also begin to isolate themselves from valuable social time with friends. Additionally, some porn consumers start to feel shame about their porn habit, which make them feel even more isolated from their support systems.53 Disconnect from porn, reconnect with the people around you.
19. Maintain mental/emotional health
A number of peer-reviewed studies have found a link between pornography consumption and mental health outcomes like depression, anxiety, loneliness, lower life satisfaction, and poorer self-esteem and overall mental health.
These studies have found that these links are particularly strong when pornography is consumed to try to escape negative emotions, and also when pornography consumption becomes heavy and compulsive.
Quitting porn can help interrupt the unhealthy cycle of escapism and mental health issues.
20. Take back control
According to qualitative research involving individuals who wanted to quit porn, many reported feeling that they had âlost control over [their] own behavior.
Getting caught in an unhealthy or even addictive cycle of pornography limits the feeling of control a consumer has over their life. Although it may take some time, quitting porn can allow you to take back that control and live a healthier life.
21. Be the author of your own sexuality
Watching porn isnât âexploring your sexual fantasies/preferences.â Itâs allowing a toxic industry to dictate your sexual template for youâitâs internalizing misogyny, racism, aggression, and all-around unrealistic and unhealthy expectations for sex. Reenacting whatever youâve seen in porn does not make you a great sexual partner, it just makes you a non-communicative one.
Unplugging from porn will help you become more in tune with what you and your partner want instead of influencing you to reenact what youâve seen in porn.
22. Be pro-sex
As a sex-positive organization, weâre here to tell you that an industry that glorifies a lack of consent, fetishizes race, and ignores mutual pleasure is not sex-positive. Not to mention, research consistently shows that porn consumption is associated with sexual dysfunction (for both men and women) and decreased sexual satisfaction.
Rejecting pornâs toxic narratives is unequivocally pro-sexâitâs about discovering what you want, and not letting a multi-billion dollar industry dictate your sexual template for you. Be the author of your own sexuality, not an imitation of something that isnât even real.
23. Have more energy
A porn habit can consume your time, attention, and energy. Research shows that many porn consumers report neglecting basic needs like eating or sleeping in favor of watching porn.63
Without healthy food and sleep habits, your body can easily feel drained of the emotional, physical, and mental energy it needs to keep up with the daily hustle of life. By turning off the monitor, you can refocus on building healthy habits.
24. Be emotionally resilient
Many consumers use porn as a form of escapism to avoid their challenges rather than facing them in healthy ways. Interestingly enough, research indicates that those who consumed pornography to avoid uncomfortable emotions had some of the lowest reports of emotional and mental wellbeing. By letting go of porn as an escapism technique, you can build more emotional resilience.
25. Stop exploiting the LGBTQ+ community
For an industry that is often culturally thought of as being allied with the LGBTQ+ community, the mainstream porn industryâs depictions of LGBTQ+ individuals and relationships suggest that they are less interested in accurate representation and more interested in profiting at the expense of LGBTQ+ people.
Porn often fetishizes sexual orientation or gender identity, uses degrading terms to describe LGBTQ+ people, and misrepresents them through harmful and degrading stereotypes.
26. Protect your relationship
According to study that tracked couples over time, porn consumption was the second strongest indicator that a relationship would suffer.65 Plus, research consistently shows that porn consumers are twice as likely to later report experiencing a divorce or breakupâeven after controlling for marital happiness, sexual satisfaction, and other relevant factors.
There is no substitute for real connection, and porn isnât worth risking that.
27. Save your money
Paula Hall, a sex and porn addiction therapist, says sexcam addicts make up an increasingly large number of clients who come to her seeking help, and that users become hooked on these fantasies that feel more like a personal relationship than free porn. âPeople start spending more time and money than they intend to⊠They keep chasing the same dopamine hit.
Even if youâre not personally spending money on porn, your time spent on porn sites is contributing money to a toxic industry.
28. Avoid being sexually self-centered
Porn can easily reinforce self-centered sexual behavior by focusing only on the consumerâs desires and boundaries. In real-life sexual experiences, communication, consent, and mutual pleasure are keyâall of which are rarely shown in porn.70
Porn culture has normalized getting exactly what you want sexually, exactly when and how you want it. With so many people consuming pornography, is it any wonder that many are developing attitudes of sexual entitlement?Feeling entitled to anyone elseâs body is a dangerous notion, and itâs not healthy.
29. Invest in your hobbies
Qualitative research reveals that problematic consumers who are trying to give up porn often report regretting the âwasted timeâ they could have been spending on hobbies or other worthwhile pursuits.
Pornography is not only a passive activity rather than a hobby, but it can be a destructive passive activity. Plus, replacing unhealthy habits with healthy ones is a great tip to quitâstart exercising, learn some new recipes, take up knitting, whatever!
30. Listen to the research
Who should you really believeâhundreds upon hundreds of peer-reviewed studies, survivors, and the personal experiences of countless people? Or a multi-billion dollar industry that makes money off of getting you to believe their product is harmless?
31. Promote mutual pleasure
Research analyzing the content of the most-viewed porn videos of all time reveals that only 18% of women compared to 78% of men were depicted as reaching orgasm.Thatâs a pretty significant gap, and can perpetuate male-centered sexual experiences rather than promoting mutual pleasure.
32. Help combat child sexual exploitation
Research indicates that teen-themed porn often refers to the portrayal of underage individuals, and that this theme is becoming increasingly popular. Thatâs especially disturbing, considering that porn can be so effective at normalizing sexual violence that many sexual predators use porn to groom their victims and desensitize them to sexual advances.
According to one report, of the domestic minor trafficking victims who had been forced into porn production, the average age they began being filmed was 12.8 years old. In order to combat child sexual exploitation, itâs important to be educated on its prevalence and be aware of the conditions that may be fueling itâincluding extreme pornography from the mainstream industry.
33. Stand in solidarity with survivors
Itâs no secret that the porn industry profits from nonconsensual content and abuse, so avoiding porn is an effective and meaningful way to support the countless survivors of image-based sexual abuse, sex trafficking, and child sexual abuse material. Not only are porn consumers more likely to victim-blame survivors of sexual assault and more likely to support violence against women, but itâs virtually impossible to guarantee that the porn youâre watching is ethically, consensually, or even legally made. Listen to survivors, and stand with them in solidarity.
34. Help break the cycle of shame
Porn and shame are inextricably linked. In fact, research shows that shame can actually fuel problematic porn habits, leading to an unhealthy cycle of both porn and shame.
Letting go of both porn and shame can be an incredibly empowering experience that can help you live a healthier life. As one Fighter explained after quitting porn, âIâm not ashamed of myself all the time. It feels like Iâm finally myself.â
35. Build more productive habits
Addictive habits can make us lose sight of our priorities and ultimately feel unproductive. Our grades slip, our passion for projects dwindle, and our relationships can become abandoned.
36. Invest in your career
Paula Hall, the sex and porn addiction therapist we mentioned earlier also says that some porn addicts âstart noticing they are not spending time with loved ones, or are leaving the club early to spend more time on these sites. They might then gravitate toward using them at work. Often it ends with them using the work computer. That can end their career and Iâve seen people lose a marriage over it.
In fact, real stories of people being caught watching porn at work prove that more and more people are putting their jobs at risk by looking at porn during work hours. Donât let this destructive material ruin the things that matter most for your daily life.
37. Stop perpetuating sexism
Remember earlier when we talked about how research indicates that as few as 1 in 3 and as many as 9 in 10 porn scenes contain physical violence or aggression? Well, that same research also shows that women are almost always the targets of that violence or aggression in pornâapproximately 97% of the time.
Violence against women is unfortunately common in pornography, and research also suggests that it can have an effect on peopleâs sexual attitudes and behaviors.
38. Appreciate body diversity
A recent poll found that the more porn a man consumes, the more likely he is to be dissatisfied with his penis size. And the same goes for women with male partnersâthe more porn they consume, the less satisfied they are with their partnerâs penis size.
With airbrushed images and highly edited scenes, porn can easily set the stage for body dysmorphia. But real, flawed human bodies are unique and beautiful. A world without porn and synthetic beauty is a world where comparison doesnât overtake appreciation. Ditch the porn and its unrealistic body expectations.
39. Be an influencer, not a follower
By raising awareness on this important issue, you wonât just be another person in the crowd following alongâyouâll be helping to shift the culture that feeds into a toxic industry. Donât be a followerâtake a stand and be the change you want to see in the world.
40. Ditch loneliness
Many consumers watch porn when theyâre feeling lonely, but research actually shows that pornography fuels loneliness.
Researchers found that the relationship between porn and loneliness was bidirectional, meaning those who viewed pornography were more likely to feel lonely, and those who felt lonely were more likely to view pornography. At the end of the day, porn fuels an unhealthy cycle of loneliness that just isnât worth it.
41. Avoid contributing to victimsâ trauma
Weâve said it before and weâll say it againâthereâs no viable way to guarantee that the porn youâre watching is truly consensual, ethical, or even legal. For those who have been abused, manipulated, or coerced in porn, contributing to the viewership of that trauma can feel like re-victimization to survivors.
As one former performer told us, âI hate that ten years later, people are still watching my most humiliating and traumatizing moments out of the consent I gave in my teens and twenties as an addicted, alcoholic, traumatized young woman running from her dangerous off-porn life. I wish âconsentâ had an expiration.â
42. Deal with stress better
Instead of healthy levels of stress, which can help motivate us in healthy doses, research suggests that porn can contribute to an unhealthy cycle of stress, which is actually one of the hallmarks of addiction.
As one individual who successfully quit porn told us, âThe stress and anxiety that used to be persistent in my life is basically gone.â
43. Object to objectification
Sexual objectification occurs when people perceive others as sex objects, rather than complex human beings deserving of dignity and respect. In fact, in a review of research on sexual violence, two leading experts called sexual objectification the âcommon threadâ that connects different forms of sexual violence.
Consuming pornography is often objectification in practice, so itâs no surprise that research routinely shows that frequent porn consumers are more likely to sexually objectify and dehumanize others. Letâs be the kind of people who treat people like people.
44. Ditch fake sex
Donât take sex tips from an industry that profits from fake orgasms. Enough said.
45. Stop contributing to toxic narratives
Popular porn plot lines often include incest, racism, sexism, misrepresentation of the LGBTQIA+ community, underaged teens being taken advantage of, rape, manipulation, etc. By avoiding porn, youâre avoiding contributing to the normalization and glorification of toxic narratives, and thatâs a great thing.
Plus, by ditching porn, youâre also helping to protect yourself from developing toxic attitudes based on those porn themes.
46. Reclaim self-confidence
Research indicates that consuming porn is linked with more negative body image, lower self-esteem, and poorer mental health. By kicking the habit, you can start to build confidence in all aspects of life.
47. Avoid romanticizing unhealthy relationships:
Itâs no secret that porn glorifies aspects of toxic relationships. Whether thatâs cheating, incest, a lack of communication, coercion, or lopsided relationship dynamics, normalizing unhealthy relationships isnât okay. Real intimacy offers so much more. Real intimacy is a world of satisfaction and excitement that doesnât disappear when the screen goes off. Itâs the breathtaking risk of being vulnerable with another human being.
Itâs inviting them not just into your bedroom, but into your heart and life. Real intimacy is about what we give, not just what we get. Porn doesnât portray true connections, it can only scratch the surface.
48. Have realistic relationship expectations
Relationships require work. They arenât always flawless, and sex (if sex is involved) wonât be easy and perfect every single time. Love can be messy but thatâs the beauty of itâitâs real, not synthetic. Itâs natural, not produced. Porn can be the opposite of connectionâitâs isolating and self-focused. Real connection is immeasurably better than porn because real connection is exactly thatâitâs real. Ditch the porn and develop healthier relationship expectations.
49. Be a more supportive partner
Being a supportive partner includes being sensitive to the feelings and needs of your partner and what might be causing them pain. According to a 2015 study, previous partnersâ pornography consumption predicted womenâs levels of feeling sexually objectified, higher levels of body shame, and even lead to increased eating disorder symptomatology.
Additionally, porn has been shown to foster unrealistic expectations that partners feel they can never live up to in a real relationship.98 Many partners internalize their shame and confusion, asking themselves why they arenât âenough.â
In fact, one study found that the frequency of an individualâs porn consumption was negatively correlated with their partnerâs sense of self-esteem, level of relationship quality, and sexual satisfaction.100 Invest in your relationship, support your partner, and let go of pornâitâs not worth it.
50. Do something you can be proud of
Taking the challenge to give up porn is not always easy, but by quitting porn, youâre taking a stand against a dangerous, exploitative industry and building healthier habits for you and your relationships.
No matter your reasons, giving up porn is definitely something you can be proud of. You got this!