Prayers Fasting Prepared Healthy Meal Watched NoPMO Motivational Video Haircut Household Errands 16.8km Walk Listened to Scripture Mindful Breathing Worked on eBay Business PMO Recovery Work Philosophy Course Looked at Life Plan Conversation with Loved Ones Visualisation Journal Entry Recorded Video Rewire Companion Entry
The battle is already won, we just have to show up and claim the victory.
I appreciate the people in my life who provide helpful advice, support and encouragement. I don’t want to know where I’d be without them.
Prayers Fasting Watched NoPMO Motivational Video Household Errands Goals for the Week 16.9km Walk Listened to Scripture Mindful Breathing Worked on eBay Business PMO Recovery Work Philosophy Course Life Plan Conversation with Loved Ones Visualisation Journal Entry Recorded Video Rewire Companion Entry
You are good enough bro! Don’t let shame binds you nor put Porn with a bigger power than it has.
You are not less of a person just because you relapsed or watch porn. Not condoning the act but non-religious people do them as it has become too normalized…
I’m happy to hear that you’re writing your journal again.
Thanks for saying that man! I don’t think that about myself often, so I appreciate the reminder.
Rock bottom isn’t when you’re in the most pain, it’s when you decide that you’ve had enough pain.
Today I didn’t run away from the pain. I put away my devices and sat alone in silence for hours. No music, no YouTube, no games, just me and my thoughts. The first hour felt like AGES. And when the thoughts came, I picked up the pen and started writing.
I had watched a video on YouTube from Improvement Pill about dopamine fasting and getting your life back on track. Once I watched it I knew it was something I wanted to do. He spoke about 5 questions to ask yourself during this period with no distractions. His advice was to dig deep and be as detailed as possible - there’s nothing else to do!
What pain am I in right now?
Why am I in pain?
What can I do to fix it? What 1-3 actions can I take, starting tomorrow, that will begin to address the pain?
Describe the worst possible scenario if I do not take any action for the next 5 years?
Describe the best possible scenario if I consistently carry out these actions for the next 5 years.
Digging deep was dark and disturbing, but the answers taught me a great deal about myself and why I found it difficult to break free.
Here’s the video:
Prayers Fasting Watched NoPMO Motivational Video Dopamine Fast until Evening 9.8km Walk Weekly Weigh-In (1.2kg closer to goal weight) Listened to Scripture Mindful Breathing Psychoanalysis Made Plans for eBay Business PMO Recovery Work Philosophy Course Writing about My Future Conversation with Loved Ones Visualisation Journal Entry Recorded Video Rewire Companion Entry
"Our biggest fear is not that we are inadequate, our biggest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
Who are we to play small so that other people won’t feel insecure around you? We are all meant to shine as children do. It is not in some of us, but it is in everyone. As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people the reason to follow suit"
@PatrickJ@josephvt Thank you, brothers. I’ve learned the hard way that if I don’t put in the work to make change happen, things will only get worse for me. Part of the reasons why I’ve been in pain and continued to relapse is because there are things in my life I want to change, and I have avoided changing them for a long time. Things like being overweight, living at home unemployed with no income, not developing myself creatively or intellectually and leaving my goals unmet. Now, I’m choosing to do the work to make things better.
@TheWillToLive Love that quote! Beautiful message; thanks for sharing.
Time flys. Especially when you wake up at 1:45 PM
There were things that I had planned to do today; a friend who I said I would meet at 2 PM, and oversleeping meant I couldn’t go through with my plans. It was a wakeup call. My sleep routine has been off for months! To maintain the growth I want to see daily, I want to give proper attention to sleeping on time. I’m grateful for the lesson.
I had to stop and be thankful while I was out on my walk today. I passed a woman who was being looked after by a carer, and her legs weren’t stable enough to walk on her own. My legs are strong and healthy, I walk more than 5km daily, and yet I complain that “I haven’t walked enough today…” I’m thankful that I’m healthy and that I can walk without support. If I don’t meet my goal today, it’s not the end of the world. At least I got up, left the house and took action towards improving myself.
Prayers Fasting Plan for the Day Prepared Healthy Meal Watched NoPMO Motivational Video 13.1km Walk Listened to Scripture Mindful Breathing Made Plans for eBay Business PMO Recovery Work Learning for Philosophy Course Conversation with Loved Ones Visualisation Gratitude Journal Entry Recorded Video Rewire Companion Entry
Prayers Fasting Plan for the Day Cold Shower Watched NoPMO Motivational Video 29km Walk Listened to Scripture Mindful Breathing Worked on eBay Business PMO Recovery Work Conversation with Loved Ones Household Errands Visualisation Gratitude Journal Entry Recorded Video Rewire Companion Entry
@Davidfredrich Hey David, it varies. It may be listening to a podcast about recovery, watching a documentary or motivational video by a YouTuber, journaling about the addiction, or reading a book on recovery.
@Davidfredrich Yes indeed. I find that when I continually fill my mind with motivational content and positive,healthy thoughts about freedom from addiction, I reach a stage where it becomes easier and easier to remain free. I’ve reached that point before, but I took it for granted and stopped taking the actions that helped me get there. I want to get back to that place with the wisdom of experience and appreciate all the joys and benefits of freedom. Thankfully, I’m free today and I’m taking action to remain free.
A companion shared a fascinating idea today about The Law of Wasted Efforts. It made me think about the way we tend to internalise failures. I’ve been very guilty of this in the past, that alone could explain a great deal on how I’ve arrived at this stage I’m at. But we truly only fail when we give up. As long as we continue, we open ourselves up to the possibility to receive new answers and solutions to break the cycle.
Here’s the short article:
DO you know that lions only succeed in a quarter of their hunting attempts — which means they fail in 75% of their attempts.
Despite this small percentage shared by most predators, they don’t despair in their pursuit and hunting attempts.
The main reason for this is not hunger as some may think, but it is the understanding of the “Law of Wasted Efforts” that has been instinctively built into animals, a law in which nature is governed.
Half of fish eggs are eaten … half of the baby bears die before puberty … most of the world’s rains fall in oceans … and most of the seeds of trees are eaten by birds.
Scientists have found that animals, trees, and other forces of nature are more receptive to the law of “wasted efforts”.
Only humans think that the lack of success in a few attempts is failure … but the truth is that: we only fail when we “stop trying”.
Success is not to have a life free of pitfalls and falls … but success is to walk over your mistakes and go beyond every stage where your efforts were wasted looking forward to the next stage.
If there is a phrase that summarises this world, it will simply be: continue all over again.
Be Inspired
Prayers Fasting Plan for the Day Watched NoPMO Motivational Video 12.9km Walk Listened to Scripture Mindful Breathing Worked on eBay Business PMO Recovery Work Online Sex Addicts Anonymous Meeting Conversation with Loved Ones Learning for Philosophy Course Visualisation Gratitude Journal Entry Recorded Video Rewire Companion Entry
I was having a conversation with a companion today on what it is that keeps us stuck. Why is it that we see some of us soaring ahead while others seem to be in the same place?
Addiction is the strangest thing. It makes no rational sense whatsoever. It’s why an outsider will say, “Why can’t you just stop?” Why would anyone want to inflict that level of pain and suffering on themselves?
The thing is that we don’t want to inflict that pain on ourselves. We are all here because we want to stop. That’s not the problem. The problem is WHEN.
I’ve desperately wanted to stop doing this ever since I started. But I didn’t want to stop TODAY. So many times I told myself that tomorrow is a new day, I’ll make sure that day is PMO free. But I would spend the evening binging and hating myself for it. “Whoops, it’s 1201 now, guess tomorrow’s out of the question, I’ll start the next day instead.” Every time I found some reason or justification or excuse why I wasn’t able to stop for good today, something I could lean on in order to go back. None of it was accidental, but I just didn’t see my choices leading me down this road. It seemed like I was trapped, but I was the one trapping myself by not taking it seriously enough to make a firm commitment.
No one pictures themselves doing this in the future. No one wants to be trapped in addiction for life. If you tell my 18 year old self that he’d still be doing PMO in 2020, he’d have to be locked up for his own protection. It’d drive him insane.
But the future arrives one day at a time, one decision at a time. Every decision matters. If today, we make the choice to put off what we truly want to do, to hold off from being the person we truly wish to become, then day by day we will become someone we didn’t want or plan to be. We can continue to delude ourselves with false pleasures or dive into the ice-cold depths of uncertain change to find our destiny.
Prayers Fasting Plan for the Day Watched NoPMO Motivational Video 11.4km Walk Listened to Scripture Mindful Breathing Plans for eBay Business PMO Recovery Work Conversation with Loved Ones Learning for Philosophy Course Visualisation Gratitude Journal Entry Recorded Video Rewire Companion Entry
I think the main problem for members of this forum is that we try to refrain from watching porn, masturbating and/or ejaculating our sperm.
By doing this, we lock ourselves in the identity of an abstinent person.
An abstinent person is above all someone who resists something, who struggles not to succumb, who must let go of bad habits and find different coping strategies to deal with certain dysfunctions in his life.
It’s only a matter of time before the person is to blame again: tomorrow, in a month, in a year, or … never because they will be dead before they do.
We must not be abstinent!
It’s like cigarettes: we don’t quit smoking by abstaining from smoking, we do it by becoming the kind of person who takes special care of their health, fitness and energy … And for whom it is 100% normal never to touch a cigarette again.
Prayers
Bless Be God , Amén vamen
Prayers
