Day 12
I got up early this morning, went jogging, got back and took a cold shower.
Its amazing how much it helps to start the day off right.
Day 16
I haven’t posted for a few days because I didn’t know what to say. So, I spent some time today reading other people’s diaries and learned more about how to use this to help me.
One of my big struggles is urges, but another one is the reoccurring thought, “there’s nothing wrong with this.”
Sometimes my relapse is because I dive straight in after a powerful urge. Most often though, I relapse because I see something that isn’t really that bad. Well, it is. Even if it is technically considered PG but all worldly standards, its enticing for me. I watch that, that leads to something else that isn’t really that bad, and so on and so on.
That happened to me today, but thankfully I caught myself at step one.
I realized when that happened that my reason for turning away was just “because”. It seems like when I am tempted all reason leaves me. I’m no longer motivated by all the reasons I want to quit.
How do I keep fighting when my mind tells me that porn is the only thing that matters?