I know for me in the act of looking at porn and fapping, I justify myself by saying “it only hurts me” So what happens when you have to tell your girlfriend you had a relapse and she is furious with you? What about telling your parents or religious leader? What if you decide to act out on someone you care about what you see in porn and getting arrested? What then? How do you heal your relationships with loved ones after you have hurt them with th is addiction?
We will definetly have to talk about this @Angel_in_Distress
@anon66785751
@neveragaintw
@ReloadingSacks
@speak.aditya.asia
@nagate It will be… too hurting (forget the personal part) going back to the memories where my loved ones were hurt due to this devil I was once…
I will try though once I have composed myself
EDIT: It will be more a confession than just a reply
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After my relapse, i dont hide it from my wife. And i listen when she Reprimand at me.
Then, i come with other strategy and tell her my new plans and resolutions.
And i know i shall overcome one day. Yes i believe. I will be successful one day.
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That’s quite serious. If you think the addiction level is too high, then consulting with a clinically approved expert who helps patients would be a good idea. And consult sooner before one gets involved with law enforcement and cops.
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(I am not sure whether the person we are talking about is you so I am assuming that it is someone else.)
There are some questions which are needed to be asked here-
- Is the person you are talking about realizes what he has done is wrong or he just feels it wrong because he was caught or he is in trouble because of that?
- What was the magnitude of resulting trauma upon that ‘loved one’ due to such an act?
If there is a legal trouble involved here then let the law take its course and punish him appropriately. And after he has served his sentence then it will depend upon the victim if she/he wants to forgive him or not.
He will have to accept the fact that he has done something extremely wrong and he should not expect any forgiveness from the victim. What his parents and religious leaders think should not be his first priority. If he has served his sentence and the victim has forgiven him after that the parents and others shall not have any reason to rebuke him. Again it will depend upon their discretion.
What that person can do (after serving the sentence) is to improve upon himself. He might need to join some support group or see a psychiatrist. When the law has taken its course then instead of repenting upon the past, he should work on himself to become a better individual. That is all what he can do, forgiveness and societal acceptance are subjective things.
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What do you mean? Why me?
PMO is destroying my relationship.
I cant let it happen.
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I just wanted you to share your thoughts on this, thats all 
I have no girlfriend. My father had probably similar problem, but we never talked about it. The only person who might know just a little bit is my brother with whom I can talk about everything openly without being ridiculed.
I was video game/porn addict, so you can tell how much they affected on my social life. Anyway I try to slowly rebuild it.
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Yeah i got you brother, i gave the disclaimer because from his question it was not clear that he himself had done such an act or someone else.
It was me. But things are going well now. To answer, just do the best you can to make things right. Unfortunately I won’t be able to do that because the person I harmed is in another state and her dad hates me. Still through my therapy I was able to do what I can to make it right. Still it all begins with accountability.
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