WalkWithoutFear's Diary - Journey to Recovery From PMO addiction

I started at May 1! And I couldn’t travel because I’m broke. But I’m planning to move-in to my province later in my life! Less expensive place to live, less polluted, more peaceful, and it will definitely prolong my life (foods are fresh from the crops in there!).

Wow man. That’s like 9 days now. How’s that going ? I am day 6. I see. Fresh food in province. You happen to live in the Philippines. ? You can add me if you like code: 826714.

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I somewhat feel to M again, but I managed to overcome that feeling. I added you bay da wei.

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Do you have a pseudonym or alternative name at the companions manifest? I couldn’t recognise you!

No. Its Warrior7 username.

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Hello. I am now day 13 and I have been getting weird sudden unnoticed ejaculation every 6 days that passes. I wouldn’t call it a full ejaculation. I don’t think i would even call it ejaculation lol. Its like when I was talking to my girlfriend and stuff its when it happened second time. First time.was when i stretched and stuff. Anyways I feel much more energetic and aware as well now. Although I still have lazy habits. I am keeping myself productive and trying not to be a scaredy cat And try new things slowly. I think I had blue balls in day 11 or 12. It was weird. Haha whatever that was. Doing college and no fab can be a big toll on body. But I try meditating. I’m guessing every 6 days I will have some type of wet dream not sure. But hopefully by time it wont happen no more. As long as my body does it naturally and I don’t fab. I can recover from this addiction. Who ever said addictions can be recovered quickly. Whoever said that don’t know. Haha.

This is crazy. I relapsed today. I had a huge urge today. Not sure if it’s called flatline but the huge urge came back to me today. I feel dumb and feel like i am useless now. This sucks man. You know I feel like taking a break from here and I will come back when ready. I will masturbate to a wall and see if my habit diminishes next time I have urge. And then will start the no Fab. I don’t know what else to do!! Its crazy! And plus my social anxiety really is prison to me.

Current streak: 0 days
Longest streak: 21 days
Code: 826714
Location: USA

Yes! I broke up with girlfriend. She couldn’t understand fully my addiction when I talked to her about it. She even said she was ignorant when it came to porn addiction. I kept it hidden from her but I told her 5 days ago. I was making her understand the times when we didn’t talk. That those times we didn’t talk I was watching porn. And the times I lied to her i was busy. I was watching porn. And she was shocked. As a man I understand she will feel disappointed in me and be ignorant when it comes to that subject but I told her that i am dealing with it and I just need her to support me in this walk. Like be encouraging when I fall. But she never was. And I understand because maybe she doesn’t want to deal with that. Its too much to handle for her. So its best to be single for now. Until I can recover. Although not sure if its the right thing to do. What do you guys think? I also don’t want to regret.
@Antonio
@DeepakSharmaAgra

Very few women are going to understand this addiction. We as guys have to resolve this independent of others. A few people who understand will support you but I think men are more understanding of this problem than women.

I hope if your breakup had to due with fapping that you can get better and try with her again.

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I think Cooper makes a good point - this is much more understood by men than women. I think masculinity has been suppressed over the years. In a lot of cases, there is no room for masculinity in today’s society because it burns like wildfire in the wrong hands, under the untrained and unwise. The only thing that is wrong with masculinity is that we have pushed it down for so long, because it can be violent, rough and loud- it’s drive, perseverance and also at the same time death and nothingness. And as a society, I think we have lost the Teachings of How to learn to work and become familiar with our own masculinity- to use it for good. Lots of men don’t like talking to each other about these topics like women do, but if are going to get past this set back, we need to start practicing and keep roothing each other on-- especially if we plan on passing down any of this knowledge of our own down to the next generation.
Now, it’s important to remember, a lot of money has been spent on advertisement to tell us men that our Drive to push through and get things done is not good for society because masculinity in the untrained hands is dangerous… so society has created a very lucrative outlet for men to “release” in the most basic way and that is through Porn and Masturbation.
I think the reason why you’re female and a lot of other male’s females do not understand the addiction of porn is because they have more acceptable outlets for their own build-up of the feminine energy. It’s more acceptable for a woman to be motherly to someone or plant a garden or decorate the house or dance then it is for a man to find a goal and crush it, accept the challenge and crawl through the mud to achieve it.
We as a group, need to pull together and listen to understand, practice to gain experience and then mature in our masculinity together- and only together we can, create a society together in harmony with the mature feminine. I think only then, balance can be reached.

So in short WWF, I would talk heart to heart with your female, express your needs and concerns and let her know that this is something very important to you and you wish for her support during your journeys… if she loves and cares about you, she will believe and want to support you because it’s important to you. If not, it is still your responsibility for you to fix what is broken and not sulk about what is already done.

Also, read: The Way of the Superior Man
by David Data
This will help understand male and female masculine and feminine more

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I just told my girlfriend that I need a time off. A break from phone usage. We are Long distance relationship. So its a little different. But yeah I said to her that I need some break like at least 7 days to be with myself. And really take time for myself. She understood. And that’s great. I thought she would say no but she understands now that I told her about the severity of the addiction it has on the relationship.

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I totally agree with you man. Woman just have hard time understanding severity of this. You have to really explain so much. Sometimes it takes them months to understand. Its annoying. Lol.

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Wow bro! That’s powerful stuff you said… Yeah I totally agree. We as men should be able to talk about this stuff.and overcome as a clan. :muscle:

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Absolutely- There’s no shame, just progress.

Code: 826714
Current streak: 4 days
Longest streak: 21 days
A fight to die for because it’s worth it!
Day 2 was a good day and better than other days because I did alot of lawn mowing and yard work, tried reading a book which is hard, exercised. Day 3 I did no yard work and didn’t work out because I felt sick, but what triggered me being horny was the fast food I ate. It was carls Jr. Burger and fries. But I didn’t give in to temptation because I know even though I wasn’t so proactive, I never want to be that addictive porn person who is stuck in a cage. Both day 2 and 3 I didn’t wake up the time I wanted to as listed in my goals to wake up at 4:50 a.m. I did more in day 2 than in day 3. Now its day 4 today and The morning , I want to make my day right with a healthy breakfast, a good exercise full of energy, try at least to talk to a random stranger if only 1 word. That’s my goal today to do that at least. Step by step toward passing more than my 21 days highest streak.

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I plan to do easy mode first. I realized that going straight for hard mode does work but it never gets me far because I have an addiction after another addiction. I think its better you abstain from porn first if you really are stimulated to porn that includes (no edging) no porn. Nothing! But masturbating. After easy mode is done i believe those who are addicted should quit masturbating. While in this walk i will drink a ginger, garlic, honey, oregano, lemon tea. Or healthy tea. No fast food like planned for journey to recovery. Eating healthy food. Sleeping at right time, wake up 4:45 a.m. go for a run while in easy mode to. This isnt considered NoFab yet. Journey to recovery here I come.
By the way anyone who wants to join me in this feel free to add me
Code: 826714

Hey Bro! This post really resonated with me, and think it’s great that You (nobody else) are really looking at yourself, mind, body and spirit. Being realistic and addressing your struggles.
You were in my prayers at this morning’s Mass.

I’ve had many addictions and despair, and I really encourage you to keep going!

Please feel free to add me 098993a
And let’s chat sometime!

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Same. Since I embarrass myself like a shame of the humans for years and even bullied and name-called inhumanely, I feel very anxious and allergic among crowds, and that makes me have no friends in campus. And I can’t stand it. That’s why I move to another campus hoping for better people and better friends.
But internal family problems, restlessness, and loneliness made me unable to get even past a week of NoFap streak.

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Brother. What i said in these posts are true because first step to recovery is to be honest with yourself and with a community like rewire companion or physical. Anything to defeat this not on your own. But a support group. Bro we can do this if we stick to the routine and create new habits. In my case i have 3 addictions. Porn, masturbation, and fast food. Includes anime open, other none sense that I dont watch now. Anyways that’s for having me in your prayers. I realized when I was 2 months of no porn no masturbation before I came to this app I didn’t know what NoPMO was. All I knew was that I had to quit porn and the addictions that are harming me. I was trying to walk a spiritual walk that time. And now I aint no more. Maybe if i walk more in spirit since it does have to do with mindset. I can gain back that edge I had. Like a burning fire. I was walking more by God that time, its never to late for a warrior of God to go back. Amen. He knows my struggles. I highly encourage a support group though.

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Bro you have to join support group of some sort or try to. Like a physical group dealing with that, spiritual, other networks that fit you. I have mild social anxiety and I can tell you. If you are consistent you can overcome. I can talk to strangers for a while now, in the past I couldn’t. But being honest its hard because if you only had porn and masturbation for days or a day of binging then try make conversation it will be hard.

I have a question. Do you have alot of different fetishes in porn? Do you jerk off only when you watch porn?

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