Lack of honesty with yourself is a big problem
I think the most fundamental thing you can do to change yourself for the better and something you can’t really skip is to face yourself and realize your truth with no distortions caused by shame or the opinions of other people. We don’t want to hear the truth or even admit it to ourselves, it’s painful, as a result, we live in our own distorted reality detached from the world and not in tune with it and so we dig that hole just a little deeper each time. This is why porn is a very powerful addiction, it gives you a false sense of sucess with women. This is just one side of the problem but it’s much deeper than that. Without you dealing with what you don’t want to deal with and getting out of the shitty hole that you dug yourself, forget it, you will keep falling again and again.