I didn’t quit this again. Though I was hoping.
Every 37th day is a tragedic relapse for me.
I’m a hopeless piece of paper thrown away in the muddy puddle. I want to go to the dark steet, find the hiighest building and jump into a plain hard ground. It won’t change the world even a little. 7 days after nobody will care but my already unhappy mom. Some people will say sorry just because it’s what they are supposed to say. Then the planet will continue to spin. People who are strong will become stronger and create their desires. And babies will unwillingly come and just after some time go nowhere. 90% will be like me. I’m not unique. I don’t want to see any of these.
But its just a desire. It won’t happen because it also takes courage and energy. If I’d have one I wouldn’t kill me. I would pmo more. Untill one day my energy dims and I die because my health went to zero. Because piece of shitty papers like me don’t decide where to be thrown. They just fly where wind blows. I’m unique only for one thing. I’m the worst person I know.
Hey dude, may I give you a little advice?
Who cares if you are unique or not? What matters is that you’re alive, and you are still yourself. Not everyone is that lucky.
I can’t give you the secret of happiness neither cure your depression, cause that’s your mission in this world; to find what gives u a reason to live.
Instead of complaining online you gotta get started on your journey. I know you want someone to listen and comprehend you, but no one can understand you better than yourself, and that’s the starting point of realization.
Don’t feel bad, I’m judging you because I trust you can be better. If you ever hesitate,
remember there’s an anon guy that’s worried about you :’) if u need someone to talk, I’m here to at least try to make you feel better. 
Hey brother, sometimes it will get real hard but always remember AFTER A STORM COMES THE CALM. Whatever that we say may not go into your head right now but, take a pause bro. Take a few deep breaths, become mindful for a second, breath deeply till you make sure that each and every cell in your body has received oxygen and prana- the life force. Now look out the window, get outside your home and look at trees, singing birds, plants, other animals, the sky, the dancing clouds, the sunlight thats kissing on your face, the wind caressing you to make you feel calm. Each moment of existence is something to be grateful for brother. Even if it is filled with suffering due to our wrong perception of things. Hold on in there; whatever that you are facing or going through it will pass away. It is the rule of nature- after thunder storm will end, cyclone will end, sun will rise, plants will grow. Nothing is permanent. We are all here to help and support you brother. Just understand that, fellow humans, your friends and brothers including me care for you deeply. Whatever is in your mind, let it out if you want. We will hear carefully and will try our best to help you. We care about you.
Continuing the discussion from I'm breaking the silence ( I AM SEXUALLY ABUSED) 
:
Hey, look these words came from you buddy. Your mind was seeing things through the right angle when you wrote this down. This is exactly what I said; trust me, things will get better. Do some exercise. Don’t sleep too much; wake up at 6 and go for a run, do some meditation, be compassionate to yourself. Run your hands through your shoulders and say, ‘its ok. Sometimes hard things will happen in life. Iam with you. We will endure and we will grow.’, listen to that beautiful song you loved when you were a child. Read a positive book. We are all here for you man
Wow,that’s great motivation man.
Your health appears to be deteriorating again bro, and I don’t know if I’m the right person to tell you anything. I don’t know if I’m even in the right state of mind myself. I don’t live in a war- torn country like yours, but trust me that life doesn’t get any easier. The very reason that you are still holding up in such adversity makes you extremely unique whether you see it or not.
You feel your life isn’t worth it, but look at your unhappy mother for once, for you are her light and you are her world. You are the little ray of hope which keeps her alive, whether you realize it or not. How would you feel if your mother jumped off the cliff when you were still a toddler? This amazing woman instead chose to endure all the sufferings because she saw the reason for her to be here in you. Whether you believe it or not, your mere existence has changed everything for better .
Definitely people won’t care, definitely the world will keep spinning, but why do you care about that? People are extremely selfish herds of goats who just follow the same queue to meet the same fate. The people who worship movie stars instead of dying soldiers, the people who celebrate on death of others, the people who build their empires on ruins of others’ homes, the people who kill in the name of God, people who earn billions but cannot bear spending money to feed a poor malnourished child … Tell me whats the use of such people and tell me why should you care? I know how you feel for I see these battles while you see a selfish war.
I slipped after 48 days, 11 days more than you. No question I’m sad about that too. I’m 25 and don’t have a job, don’t have any money, don’t have a friend in real life let alone a gf anywhere, whatever I attempt to do, I just fail and I keep failing. I can’t say if I’m depressed. Certainly, I don’t think I’m at the moment. Because I’m still alive and I can still change a lot of things if not everything. I can still do what it takes to ensure that I don’t die like those 90 percent while quitting here would definitely mean that I’d just go like them.
Raise your head and look into the skies buddy, nothing has changed ever and then look at the land below your feet where everything keep changing continuously. You stand in between the two and you know you are closer to the change than the unforgiving idleness. Sun is shining for you, the winds are blowing, streams flow to quench your thirst, the woods are calling you to experience the beauty and liveliness of your unusually simple life… Listen to the birds, they are telling you that key to your freedom and liberation is in your hands.
He is also from India .I think
Iam speechless bro @PrDr . These words made my day. Thank you; you are a poet and most certainly a good soul, a great soul 
No, he is from Armenia. He had to fight in Nagorno Karabakh war as well.
Thanks brother. You are yourself an inspiration to me and many others here. I just hope my words can help @Vardan51878 .
You are too much extremist bro… Relapsing is not end of your world. You are simply exaggerating things too much.
Get into a good habit like exploring the beauty of universe by studying physics,or get into habit of coding or start a new hobby like drawing, singings
U will find much pleasure out of these activities rather than wanking off your d***. Your dick is given to you for procreation,not to wank off to screen women
Thanks for your words. I’m not feeling those words now. But I think they are something I’ll have to understand.
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