The Mini Challenge

I had another relapse on my way here :man_facepalming:t3: but I’m glad to say I’m on Day One of my journey back into recovery and reboot. I think and feel that I’m on good footing, I’m glad to have the companions here, and I’m eager to grow in self-mastery.

Mini-challenges

:dove::o:
:person_in_lotus_position:t3:‍♂ :o:
:broom::o:
:no_mobile_phones::x:

I want to add a new challenge here too :ledger:, journaling at night.

Peace

@Aoshigreen @Gk-00

3 Likes

After checking-in, I went back to work, and had a fall too.

My mindset has changed very much recently, and will take some getting used to.
This new light I want to hold onto, but it’s an old light that has always been there - it’s a reality I can’t hold, but bow before.


He said to those who obsessed about the law but forgot the most important ones;
“Even those who lust after someone, sin in their heart”

Sin being a depart from God.

Luckily since joining this app the severity of my lust never feels as strong as it used to, and hope this belief doesn’t cause me to fall to the sin of *Pride.

*I’ve been so obsessed with sexual sins, that I did’t notice other sins, and how one leads to another.

I get so caught-up, pumped-up and enthusiastic about work and ideas that I can fail to stay humble. Work, Pride and Egos are things that have often tainted the water.

Pride = not living in the truth,
Sloth = laziness, indecisive, unspititual

I hope to stay humble, recognise the truth,
And be assertive to make decisions = am I going to work? Am I gonna rest?
And most importantly, being adaptable to those unplanned moments given by others, and to see God in the midst :pray:


Being spirited and working hard starts and ends with giving Thanks and Glory to God :pray:

3 Likes

Just control your mind…everything will be alright

2 Likes

Friday

Stayed home today, I had some chores to do. In the afternoon I went for a cycle in the park and did some push-ups and sit-ups at half way. Did not pray today.

Feeling good, no cravings so far, I probably still have to go through the hardest urges but I think I’m approaching this differently this time, my decision is to leave PMO behind for the rest of my life!

@Forodwaith @Aoshigreen how was your day? In the past days i’ve been praying for you brothers, and all other companions!

4 Likes

Thank you @Gk-00 :pray:
And hope you are finding time to slow down @Forodwaith :pray:

Friday - I struggled today, but I know I want to take it one step at a time with God alone -
Our Father :pray:

2 Likes

Easier said than done but yes, that is where much of the battle takes place.

3 Likes

Thank you for your prayers.

I am now in Day Two of my reboot. I feel like things are changing got he too. A peculiar closeness of the Lord and his voice of council and guidance. May I be so bold to think that we are all feeling something because God is indeed doing something? I trust so, and it encourages me all the more to persevere with his help.

:dove: :o:
:person_in_lotus_position:t3:‍♂ :o:
:broom::o:
:no_mobile_phones: :o:
:ledger: :x:

@Aoshigreen @Gk-00

4 Likes

Friday
I’ve finished work now

A few, very few exercises, and some before bed.
Apart from this morning, I’ve barely been idle.
I haven’t consciously prayed much, but have reflected and looked at some scripture :pray:

3 Likes

Saturday

A day of helping with kids at voluntary work, in the afternoon and evening had time to rest. All good :+1:

@Forodwaith @Aoshigreen how is it going?

4 Likes

Saturday

@Forodwaith @Gk-00

I wanted to go to confession today.
I thought work would get in the way, and I’d just have to make it another time, knowing God knows my heart.

I managed to get to church, I got there in good time.
There were quite a few people and a guy sat in the front of me in the queue - but we’re all relaxed folk, scattered over a few pews, it was obvious there was a queue - but the longer confessions took the more it seemed unluckily to make one.
I got anxious knowing that guy had pushed in front, while someone was taking a really long time :pray::pray::pray:
So I just kept going back to God, being told to have patience.

(“The desire to pray is prayer” a famous theologian said - I just remembered)

It was always about patience from the start.
Another guy sat down in front of me :weary: and the church was filling up for evening Mass… :clock3:
Patience
God wants what’s best for me, us.
We’re made in his likeness,
“God cannot reject himself” the priest told me.

After the first guy who’d sat in front of me came out and closed the door, I rushed to get in, I was anticipating the light to go off, and the door to lock, as it was really close to Mass starting and the priest obviously had to prepare, but luckily I got in, made my simple clear confession, expound a little on my ‘being’, my spiritual journey and this community. The priest blew my mind, again! And is helping me come closer to God :pray:

I walked home and prayed a Hail Mary for you guys, and carried you in my mind with Our Holy Mother. I prayed for our weak moments that we may be strong. I pray it again :pray:

Exercise - minimal :pray: (now - :+1:)
Media - minimal :+1:
Seek God - :pray: Can never do enough :pray:

Glory to God in the Highest, Peace on earth to people of good will.
(and good will to people without peace) :pray::heart:

5 Likes

Day Three

Yesterday was my day of rest which impacts some of my mini-challenges. I went to worship this morning and got washed in the Word. I’m keeping on this journey with you guys, thank you for the prayers. Will be praying for you too!

:dove: :o:
:person_in_lotus_position:t3:‍♂ :o:
:no_mobile_phones: :o:
:ledger: :x:

@Aoshigreen @Gk-00

4 Likes

Your a good man @Aoshigreen. Keep at it brother.

4 Likes

Day 0, the last straw.

I feel so bad, i failed again, and it was the last straw, because it’s killing me.

If i will fail again, then fuck my life and i will say hello to the PMO addiction.
This addiction is so powerfull you just can’t believe it. a drug, which drinks all your energy and the purpose of life!. I will take my last chance guys, if i will fail, i will quit the rewire.

Sun 15/9/2019.

1 Like

@dynamo5j It doesn’t matter how many times you fail, this community, and I are always here to give support and encouragement.

Good technique requires, patience, persistence and to be relaxed.

The guys who go heavy at the gym becomes muscle bound, stiff and inflexible.

Life is chaotic and unpredictable - survival not of the toughest, but the most adaptable.

Know and lay each brick with care, and build a good structure :pray:

4 Likes

@dynamo5j never lose hope man! Every one of us deserves a better life!

Even if you are not succeeding in leaving PMO behind, I bet you that all the times you tried it was surely worth it, rather than spending those days binging and full of misery.

That’s what I see in my journey anyway. I am not free yet, only time will tell, but I’m so happy to be here in this community and fighting for a better life!

4 Likes

Sunday

All good. Today I stayed at home with my family.

Prayer: went to Mass in the morning, and took a moment to read the Gospel and pray in the afternoon.

Physical exercise: push-ups, sit-ups

Next week I will be studying as usual, l want to keep a tight schedule and use my time well! :muscle:

@Aoshigreen @Forodwaith

3 Likes

Sunday

Hey brothers @Forodwaith @Gk-00

Media - minimal - [just rewire] :+1:
Exercise - non yet :pray: - [after this post] :+1:
Prayer - yep - morning/evening Mass, and prayed for you guys :pray:
Today’s Gospel was extremely profound.
The Priest’s Homily was amazing.

Prayed for you @dynamo5j @Positivebloke
and myself to have patience, to trust God working in other’s lives.

3 Likes

One of the most important parts of victory is resolving not to give up no matter how many times you’ve failed. Dust yourself of and choose to live in love.

2 Likes

Day Four

I attended the international service activities at my church later in the day and rested in between. Don’t good but know the need to stay humble. I have been able to seek healthy connection with those around me which helps displace unhealthy counterfeits.

I’m struggling to add my journal challenge so I need to start preparing for bed earlier.

:dove: :o:
:person_in_lotus_position:t3:‍♂ :o:
:broom: :o:
:no_mobile_phones: :o:
:ledger: :x:

@Aoshigreen @Gk-00

2 Likes

Monday

All good, working on my thesis all day as usual, enjoyed the company of my colleagues during breaks.
Did not go to church today, could’ve done it but did not want to come back home too late… Sometimes my laziness wins over :frowning_face:

@Aoshigreen @Forodwaith how was your day?

3 Likes