I am going to start this diary very soon . I am making myself comfortable with this platform first. Hope I will start very soon.
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hey there 
i wish you best of luck and enjoyment for the process of quitting.
will look forward to your thoughts and input
bests
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DAY-0
Today i relapsed twice . And really felt very bad after. i was hopeless for sometime thinking what i am going to do in the future with such low will. i am preparing for JEE engineering entrance exam in my drop year . in my first attempt i scored really low marks because of wasting too much time on masturbation . i dont watch porn but i have very bad compulsion for watching erotic movies. i tried to amend these bad habits in my drop year and i have succeed a lot . but with time i am feeling like i am returning to my old habits. i am 19 now . still confused why i am going for engineering.
actually i have to choose between research, medical , and engineering . i chose the less worse one. And i liked maths physics and chem too . that was also another reason. i clueless what am i going to do in my career. the longest day i have gone without no fap was for 5 months but that was 3 years ago . my recent long streak is for 7 days.
hopefully this time i will go for a much longer streak and achieve a gooed rank in jee.
i dont have any social media acount . i dont use any . only thing that makes me weak is that i live alone most of my time attending online classes and wasting my self study hours.
it was a brief idea of what is going in my life.
THANK YOU ALL
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Congratulations for making your own diary and just keep preparing for the exam and of course You can do it and crack the exam.
Good luck. 
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