Congratulation on crossing 10th day brother. I know you’ll destroy this addiction like a speck of dust . I’m glad that your mental condition is getting better. Good for you and your family. You are a hero bro, continue and be a real hero in every sense.
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Day 11
Thanks @PrDr for the wonderful message.
Sleep was not coming so i sat down for meditation.No movement was there and it was a good experience. Didnt put stop watch so didnt know how long i sat. Then i did a little walking in house and then easily slept in bed.
3 Rounds walking done. ((Progress))
3 Rounds HiiT cardio workout. Sweat & glory.
Often some sex dreams come in sleep which i neglect in the day. In starting of the streak, there was day dreaming, fantasy, particularly during morning wood. Now, i am getting much cleaner during the day .
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Day 12
Went early for sleep, yesterday at 9:30 pm. Thoughts kept on going. Did meditation for 5 minutes around 11 pm. Slept.
4 Rounds of walking done. ((Progress))
Little bit of jogging done in backyard.
Tried to do dand workout but there was no energy nor motivation. Tried to do forcefuly but neck muscles were stif & jerky. Hence, Rested.
Spending most of the day resting, smartphone game/internet surfing, eating, roaming around house.
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Bro you’ve been working hard. But when you are having leisure time, spend it on productive things instead of unproductive things like games, social media, useless browsing etc… These things will weaken your will and you may fall back to the same trap. You wanna be a farmer, so learn farming techniques that can be useful for you in that time. Or, just clean your, wash your clothes, help your family members in housechore works, read a good book or watch a good movie , or just go and sleep to be in a better frame of mind.
BTW I hope you and everyone in your immediate family and your away family (your wife and your kids) all are fine. May god bless you all. Take care bro
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Day 13
Thanks @PrDr
Yesterday,When watching travel videos, there was belly dancing, earlier i had fapped on such stimulus, hence Urges on day 12 night came, i had to use my will power & bring in my brain to calm the jerky mind. It was suggesting to watch more such videos, like a child wants some toy to play.
Now, it is in my power. taking a better step for me. To let go of pain & continue my journey for further healing.
Flatline/healing continues…
In flatline the brain is in sleep or not present in the moment, thoughts, brain fog, sleepy, anxiety, fear.
Good thing is that i have the sexual energy of 13 days with me and it is helping me in other stuff & also rewiring me; sometimes feels good out of the blue for a moment. It’s like some magic.
I am not compromising with my physical workouts, this is my main thing of the whole day. It lifts my soul. Motivate me to conquer further.
30
25
20
15
11
Total = 101 dand/Hindu pushups
((Progress))
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PMO makes a person angry and give him a feeling that he is of no use . My mother often said to me this year that she dont know what have happened to me , I was never like that …
These words often make me sad as i cant tell her .
Anger can ruin life , as a decisions taken in anger and jealousy are always regretted…
Just meditate and try to control ur anger , ur the best . People often think that after reaching 40 they have done what they wanted in life …
But that’s wrong .
If Joe biden can become the president at around 74(not sure ) how people think that the career is over at age of 40.
Age is just a number .
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