Shivam's Dairy [16 M]

Thanks for your advice. Well I barely watch movies . I can even count the movies I have watched in my life on my fingers .
Coming to the point. I play games for relaxation

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Thats grt bro…keep it up

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Yesterday night, I relapsed.
At day 13.
That was the stage I have failed many times.
I don’t have much to say. All I can say is that i won’t stop trying.
Again started the journey from day 0.

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Lets keep trying and be atleast 1% better today

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Bro read it,
Copied from reddit

A relapse does not mean a complete reset! Don’t hurt yourself further by binging.
A common theme I see in a lot of posts here is the tendency to, after a relapse, go on a binge for the next couple of days. The mentality that if you’ve already failed you might as well take advantage of it to the fullest. In doing this I think what a lot of us fail to realize is that, even though we’ve relapsed, it doesn’t mean that all our effort during the past days or weeks were in vain. Our brain is very plastic and has a remarkable ability to quickly change itself. Even if you haven’t gone the full 90 days, you’ve still given your brain a lot of time to rewire itself. One relapse does not completely reverse that. I know that some of you out there have some serious issues with PMO addiction and can’t possibly go more than a couple of days without relapsing, but remember that even if you manage to go only 3 or 4 days without it, it’s still a huge improvement over doing it once or several times a day. For every day and every hour you abstain, you’re giving your brain precious time to heal.

You need to treat your recovering brain as you would a broken leg. Let’s say you break your leg and the doctor tells you that you have to wear a cast and not put any weight on the leg for 6 weeks. Imagine that after 3 weeks you’re in a hurry and accidentally put all your weight on it. It hurts a lot and you’re afraid you might have caused more damage to it. What’s the best thing to do in this scenario? Probably avoid putting any more strain on the leg and give it time to heal. The same goes for NoFap, but when you binge after a relapse it’s basically like saying “Well, I already injured my leg. I might as well go run a marathon with it now.”

Our brains have a tendency to want to “abandon ship” whenever we fail. There was a study done at the University of Toronto where people on a daily calorie diet were made to eat a slice of pizza and then taste and rate different cookies. One group were told that the pizza contained more calories than it actually did and that they had exceeded their calorie intake limit, while another group were told that they were still below their limit. The whole cookie-tasting part was just a scheme to trick the participants; the real experiment was to see how many cookies they would eat. What they found was that the people in the group who thought they had exceeded their calorie limit were far more likely to eat more cookies than the group that didn’t. See any similarities to NoFap here? It seems that when we fail with a goal we’ve set for ourselves, our brain abandons reason and discipline and tries to get all it can while the getting is good. This is a tendency you have to beware of and stop quickly. How?

Prepare for failure. Sometimes it feels like we’re never going to relapse – like we got this under control and will never succumb to the temptation again. And then we find ourselves a month, or even a year, down the road with the dick in our hand having just relapsed. It can happen to the best of us. What we need to do is to prepare ourselves for this. What I would advise you to do is to get a sheet of paper or create a text document where you write something along the lines of:

“I realize that one relapse does not stunt the entire process. I have made a lot of progress in the past couple of days and I will continue with that as long as stick to the challenge and don’t go on a binge. I will now go for a walk, take a shower and then reset my badge and continue with more determination and discipline than ever before. I am stronger than this. I will not break.”

If you do relapse, then immediately read what you’ve written to yourself and proceed with the other steps. Go for a walk – it will help clear your head – and take a shower, which has a very psychologically cleansing effect on you – feel as if you shed your skin and are being born again. Then go reset your badge and feel the determination within you to start anew. See it not as a failure but as an opportunity to learn and challenge yourself further. See it as a chance to come back stronger and wiser than before.

Remember, we all fail. It’s our ability to pick ourselves up and continue going that in the end determines our success.

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Thanks for sharing this :heart:

One thing , I have realised in my last relapse is that I need to overcone the fear. The fear which makes me feel that I will eventually relapse after 5 or 10 days if I peeked and fantasized today.
I know both are bad , and I will avoid both of them.
This journey is very long and never ending. I can’t predict that there will no situations when I peek intentionally or may be unintentionally. All I need to do afrer that is stop myself immediately after realising I am doing bad and avoid them later at my best.
This is a body , it’s full of impurities. All I can is control my mind and just forgot those bad moments.

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My condition is so bad rn. I don’t have any urges.
I don’t know how to describe it . But something is getting wrong

Relapsed
Yes , I did that again. I didn’t even manage 1 day streak. Am I even considering Nofap as something which exists?
I am not this much weak that I can’t do it. 100 days seems so short to me when wasting them , how about turning those 100 days into lifechanger period.
Ok, I fantasized for a moment. Ok, Someweird thing happened and my streak isn’t clean anymore. But this doesn’t mean I should relapse and come back to the zero to start again. The time is precious , I can’t waste it in this way. I have to control my mind and tell it that unclean streak is atleast better than that Big 0.
C’mon I am not a weak shit who can’t do it. Forgot about the past, don’t even think about the last moment. Focus on present . I have to make myself best. I have to Guard my eyes , whenver a trigger occurs just see somewhere else or just close those eyes.

For myself,
Shivam, Imagine those days When you will be free from this shit. You will be ready for acheiving your dreams . No regrets , No weakness! You have to do this.

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Fantasising , can end your streak . I have installed blockers and everything, only thing that we have to stop is fantasising after seeing a women or a girl. For me fantasising has also been the reason I relapse…

Do meditation when u start to fantasise it urges hit .

YOU HAVE TO CHOOSE 100 seconds Of pleasure or 100 days of nofap

U decide.

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Reminder,

Remember

2021 IS OURS :fire:

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I can’t take it anymore!
I am relapsing daily from past 3 days. Last relapse was at yesterday’s night.
I am feeling so demotivated rn. Currently it’s day 0 again for me. Don’t know what is happening with me.
But I will start again.
I won’t Give up!

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Day 0
Somehow I survived.
Idk why , My whole mind is messed up rn . I don’t know for how long I will be able to hold myself. I am having so much stress. Idk what to do , I am just barely surviving on this streak.

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I would suggest u to observe ur pattern first…i.e. the sleeping and eating pattern and also u take it too seriously…just be patient and calm and let ur body do its work.
See first step is blocking porn

This app has been very very effective for me.
Ok so if u masturbate without porn don’t panic but be honest and push that relapse button to start again but dont take it as a license relapse again…
Now think like this…u r not addicted to this but the thing is we do something on the basis of our likes and dislikes.
According to ancient wisdom thoughts are also actions and actions and thoughts happen on conscious level, what is subliminal or unconscious is the nature or prakriti, now between these two levels there comes a small window where u become aware of something is coming up and there u have to identify ur association with that thought or action and stop it then and there or just observe it…now doing right thing means doing the right thing and cutting the wrong thing…and thoughts won’t be gone if u think u just have to observe them and they start becoming weak or u can immediately do something else or engage urself something meaningful or creative…one more aspect is be busy dont spend too much time here on this app also be busy with work, study, play, annoy ur siblings…and also devotion is another to be sober for example identifying with soul just by saying m a soul and i belong to Krishna may help this is also a kind of meditation…and simultaneously observe ur body patterns once u identify them work on them to align them that is set ur sleeping, eating and waking time and also working time…i observed that when we relapse the urges to relapse comes on the same time next day avaoid being alone at that time…
It wont happen in one day be patient, read swami vivekananda or geeta to ponder upon…
ALL THE BEST

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Wanna start with beginner exercise or yoga u can search on youtube “upa yoga isha foundation”…they will help u
Wanna know something more or have any doubt feel free to ask bhai…m proud that u have started earlier at ur age i was thinking it is normal but the truth is it is not normal to build a profound charac ter

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Day 1:-
Relapsed
Starting a fresh journey
But won’t give up

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Update:-
I relapsed today , on day 4 .

I didn’t follow any routine in past 3 days , That’s why I didn’t post anything. This proves I am stiĺl not serious.
But I have to be , there’s not any other option. I have to stand again. I can do this!

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oh no i see alot of relapsed yesterday,
lets start again

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Thanks for your help. I agree , I am thinking too much about Nofap which may leading me to relapse again and again. I will worry about my studies instead of thinking about nofap everytime.
And one thing I am getting good in is that I am not fantasizing too much now . It was the reason which lead me to relapse so many times at day 15 or near.

Noone is early or late . We are just doing it at right time.:pray:

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