Risinglion123 - The Daily Vlog

Diary
,
21

Thank you so much broo :heart:

2 Likes
22

20 December 2022

4 : 30 PM

Yesterday after my previous update , Worked out , ironed clothes , had a bath and relapsed. I saw a triggering YT Video and I lost control. For me its the post relapse that screws me up than the relapse itself.

I Binge watched YT till 1 AM. One of the reasons for these kinds of relapses is that I still have very less idea about why should I do No fap. Of course I know all the benefits and I have experienced it personally. But I need more clarity regarding this.

After that had a small confrontation with my parents regarding the Christmas celebration hangout at 23 December from 4 to 8.30 PM. They allowed me to hangout but it doesn’t made me happy by any means.

The only thing I am proud these days is that I have been leading a vegetarian lifestyle for 4 years and I am decently consistent in Workout even on the days I relapse.

Productive Activities Done

  1. Workout 1 hr
  2. Inshorts reading 30 minutes
  3. Read Novel 15 minutes
  4. Ironed Uniform
  5. Polished Shoes

Anyway Woke up at 6 : 30 AM , As always running to catch the bus , read Inshorts for 30 minutes inside the bus. Was busy completing the pending record.

During lecture hours , I was very frustrated because of unwanted sexual urge that was difficult to control. Still able to overcome it.

I am inside the bus right now. Planning to workout and iron the clothes. Not polishing shoes coz I wore chappal instead of shoes today.

That’s my plan right now.

4 Likes
23

20 December 2022

7 : 30 PM

Reached home and did MO. Idk why. I tried to resist much as possible. In these moments , Idk why I cant neither escape from it nor allow that urge to pass through. If I allow my urge to pass through , the urge becomes more stronger.

The only strategy I can think right now is maintaining a Gratitude journal in which I mention all my strengths that I want to have but in a more humble and grateful manner. Instead of saying " I am hardworking " , I will say " I am grateful to God for giving me strength to work hard and achieve my goals " .

This is one of the strategies of Hamza Mental Health guide which I binge watched yesterday through YouTube. Instead of reading it , I am planning to write it here so that it would get deep rooted in my brain.

I am planning to write here because of no of pages in a virtual diary like this is infinite. I cant neither afford to buy a diary ( Saving pocket money for personal reasons ) nor I don’t want to ask money from my parents.

I will do that Gratitude journal tomorrow. Trying to keep it simple. Just writing 5 things I am grateful of.

Download Smule so that I can sing whenever I want. Its been almost half a year I haven’t sang properly. Deep down I really want to practice singing instead of binge watching YouTube.

After the relapse , The only thing I was concerned is to reduce the damage associated with relapse. I want to overcome it asap. With blessings of God , Did Forearms , lower and middle abs workout and ironed uniform.

Now planning to study the daily portion of today and also the pending topics associated with subjects I am learning today.

That’s all my thoughts for the time being.

3 Likes
24

Hey man, I can see you are struggling with PMO, I can suggest you to practice meditation and yoga, especially the breathing techniques in yoga. Yoga is meant to help us in our daily life

3 Likes
25

I do 2 sets of Suryanamaskar as yoga , but when it comes to meditation , I am not consistent with it.

Could you please tell me some suggestions to how to prevent procrastination in studies ?

1 Like
26

I procrastinate a lot in studies, I don’t think I am the right person to advise on that lol

1 Like
27

Also Could you please tell me what kind of mindset you adopt when urges strikes in. I get really angry because of uncontrollable urge also I cant focus during strong urges.

1 Like
28

I usually try to do deep breathing, but I also saw someone wrote stop breathing which forces the brain to come back to its senses.

I think by stopping breathing might be more effective, but i have not tried it

2 Likes
29

Stopping breathing… Hmmm. Never tried that. Thanks a lot :pray:

1 Like
30

21 December 2022

12 : 45 AM

Binge watched YT and relapsed later. For me it requires less willpower to do activities like reading , Workout etc. But when it comes to habits like studying , Idk why its really tough to start and maintain.

The only solution that comes in my mind right now is to keep all my academic books as near as possible. I spent most of the time in my bedroom , so I think its a good decision to keep all my academic books in my bedroom so that it would be easier to start.

Also planning to start studying GATE from tomorrow onwards.

Productive Activities Done

  1. Woke up at 6.30 AM
  2. Read Inshorts 30 minutes
  3. Read Novel 15 minutes
  4. Workout 1 hour
  5. Ironed Uniform

That marks the end of this day , Gotta :sleeping: now. Always Thank God for everything.

2 Likes
31

21 December 2022

7 : 30 PM

Have a lot of work to do , let me make it short. As usual running to catch the bus as fast as I can , was depressed because of the less support I get from my peers.

But with Blessings from God , those depressed feelings didn’t stop me from being productive . Read 30 minutes Inshorts , 15 minutes novel , Polished Shoes , Ironed Clothes and Worked out 1 hour.

Now planning to complete pending DSP record for tomorrow

2 Likes
32

Gratitude for Today

  1. Thank you God for giving me strength to work hard and achieve my goals

  2. Thank you God for the supportive parents

  3. Thank you God for giving me strength to persevere during unfavourable times

  4. Thank you God for making me a humble person

  5. Thank you God for the lessons I learnt from my mistakes

2 Likes
33

That’s is so relateable, Sometimes I feel that too. I just say to myself that I have to help myself own my own. I feel bad too but this phase will end too.

3 Likes
34

Hlooo. Hope everyone I know in this forum is here.

1 Like
35

Well , I came here to say I just relapsed. So planning to have a strong accountability here especially in my studies.

1 Like
36

Well I am planning to update multiple times a day , because I have no idea when will I get screw up. So I should make sure I take minimum damage when I screw up.

So I believe frequent updates are necessary. But at the same time , I’ll try to keep the update short as possible to not make this habit hectic

37

My main aim right now is this , take the photos of the assignment Ive done and post it in the Google classroom.

After that planning to sleep as early as possible because I have to practice H in the driving ground tomorrow 6 : 30 AM.

As long as everything goes well , my next plan is to update while I am travelling in autorickshaw from home to college near to 8 AM

38

Ive completed this task , but I want to make a confession. One of the professor have asked me to a study a specific topic and I am supposed to appear before her tomorrow lunch break so that she will be asking questions associated with it

But I was very lazy this night , I lied to her through WhatsApp that I was busy so I was unable to study.

Anyway past is past. Looking towards a better future. Will update tomorrow at 8AM

39

Don’t waste time in updating throughout the day. It’ll be unnecessary distraction.
Rather keep an offline journal for your daily tasks, plan in that what you are supposed to do. Coming online time and again would be of no use.
Update here when you feel out of track, and also update at the end of the day how you did. That’s all that’s needed.

1 Like
40

This is what I have started keeping now a days.

1 Like