This last sunday someone started badgering me about if i wanted to become a priest.
I said no because i want to have a family and have a healthy relationship.
In my brain i started wanting to prove to myself that i am not an asexual person because i truly want to have a healthy relationship based on catholic values but not to dedicate my life to god worshipping and celibacy. I even have disagreements with the priest caste and dont want to become one of them.
This is why i relapsed for the silliest reason you can imagine.
It was without porn or visual stimulation, just me and the sensations.
Also stressed because i have a brother with cancer, i am unemployed as well as most of my family and see little future. Having to withstand family members shout and threaten each others and using me as an emotional tampon. Very frustrated, we all are here.
My new NOFAP prevention tools will be
Minimizing time on the bathroon as that is my trigger
Not to obsess about the opinions of others sbout how “virgin” i am and never let other drive me mad like this
Concentrate on studying to get my civil service job and start getting real progress.
Get some peace, do more exercise.
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