It was stress from work. I have a company that’s growing quickly and bringing lots of stresses with it and the last 5 days were utter shit. However, I’m much calmer now and I feel like I’ll easily pull a few months again and I’ll explain below the why and how.
What I have learned from this shitty experiment is that stress and problems do not just happen in a bang. Instead it creeps up very slowly and in different directions. Control the root cause and not the symptoms. PMO is only a symptom, the cause is stress, and the cause of stress is my interpretation and catastrophization of normal everyday events. The moment I realized that I was exaggerating, generalizing, and taking things out of proportion it was completely calm and quiet again.
It really comes down to loving yourself and accepting that you are flawed. This calms the mind tremendously and helps ease you out of this nasty addiction.