Reborn rebels Diary (24 M)

Hey everyone…

Today I decided to change… It is broad daylight and I flashed a porn video… Man this isn’t me I really need tp change my life…

So yeah my name is Rebornrebel as it serves a dubble perpouse… Today I decided to be reborn a guy without porn and with that I am going to rebel against these feelings and thoughts… and going to fight all my insecurities I get from watching these videos… I am so far down but there is hope for getting up and changing who I am.

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Day 1…

Today was easier then I expected… Nofap wise… So far my goal has driven me far enough to not feel a urge or to think of porn yet… But on my Nofap journey I also wanna mend things in life…

Like the fact that me and my brother has a bit of a gap and we didn’t understood each other that well and things kinda just were stuck… Today I just owned up to it and this was hard to do… I just decided to tell him I am okay and sorry for everything as some stuff stressed me out and well in the end I overthought most of the stuff and now we are on the best place ever…

Yeah I know nofap isn’t the cure to it as it is still young for me, but it driven me to make a change. First to leave porn and masterbation and that was enough to be a beter me and a better brother for once.

Day 2…

Was full of energy. I like the new positive me… I don’t know who me really is but hey I can say though is I know I am a fighter…

The night was a bit rough… it was hard falling asleep my head was busy… But yeah I wondered when it would get hard… My goal is still clear and I have challenged myself to figure myself out for a bit and small challenges that will arise like playing the guitar again which I haven’t done in a while…

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Day 3…

Felt odd the most of the day… Horney most of the times… been thinking about some of the most recent videos I have viewed… It is so scary to realise how detailed one can remember the videos especially on the favorite parts thereof…

I apologize as this is probably a touchy subject but I didn’t realise it can effect one so much… My thoughts are a bit wild but manageable… I am taking a break today from challenging myself today… but I think tomorrow will be an awesome day for working out…

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Day 5…

Well I am very sexually frustrated… I just feel horney most of the time and also uncomfortable about myself…

I found out I lost 5 kg’s today at work. We worked on the weighbridge at work today and the whole team weighed in… I was weiged in 2nd and I was the lightest of all my team. I felt so self conscientious about myself through the whole day… I don’t even feel or look handsome to myself, but other things like my biceps growing a bit and my abs starting to show kinda just counters these thoughts and yet I still don’t consciously feel attractive…

It sounds weird I know maybe along the line I can learn to accept my body and love myself more. I have given my member way too much attention as I would like today. He kinda just feels uncomfortable the whole time or itchy like I just need to touch it to feel okay and comfortable again… It is getting harder to keep up the fight, but I haven’t thought of watching porn again. So it is all good

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Day 7…

The first week done sofar a few hours before bedtime, but what a week it has been… My body developed so well I am falling in love with myself everyday a little bit more seeing my abs starting to show… I need to start exercising more to define it more… I can’t wait to see my results…

Have had a lot of fun with my brother this weekend and for the first time we had a flexing session together . It was awesome!! I was very surprised to see how good my body is comparing to his… he is a bit beter developed, but I am getting close to looking as good as him… and he was impressed to see how I was looking and he motivated me more. Man I can’t believe we had so much small stuff keeping us away from each other… It could only go beter from here…

Super tired but I feel so good

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Day 0 again…

With everything going on I just couldn’t help myself this morning… I didn’t do porn which is the most important thing… I am surprised I have made it this far… New week and new challenges and a new learning curve to get back up again…

Keep moving brother . Never Give up :muscle: :muscle: :muscle:

Thanks @risinglion123, I hope it goes well with your journey as well!!

Will definitely not give up… I mean some knocks on this journey is necessary to learn and to grow…

I’m glad I have made it a week let me rather say managed to make it as far on my first attempt… As mentioned getting rid of porn is my main priority and I am still clean of it!! Bounced back on going all in and I am feeling happy that I am keeping it up!

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