Not every relapse is equally bad

One thing that helped me quite a lot and what I wanna improve and adopt even more is, that not every relapse is equally bad (even though all are bad).

For a long time, when I opened a porn page I thought that I already relapsed, my counter shows 0 so, then I could also just continue watching. Which typically led to a 2hr porn session. Because for the counter it doesn’t matter if I continue with one more clip or not.

The thing I wanna learn to do even more is to realize, that opening a porn page is a relapse. But watching 2hrs of porn is infinitely worse than opening, watching a few seconds and forcing myself to close it again. Sure, for a long term goal, I don’t wanna open any porn pages ever again. But to get there I have to learn to resist porn in every single stage and reduce my consumption as good as possible

Doing that, helps with many things. you can learn to resist, to fight it. Before, I lost the battle in the second I opened the page. Now, I have the possibility to fight even when I already relapsed. To help me with that, I changed my usage of the counter a bit. But no details on that because people are quite sensible about that topic :sweat_smile: