Yesterday attended interview with company called Deloitte consulting, I could not clear the interview. I was sad whole day because it’s one of my favourite company I failed. Today morning , I woke up with an offer letter,(60%hike from present+joining bonus)
Life is completely unpredictable what I understood. But, I am not allowed to enjoy the old temporary pleasure. Yesterday I had urges because of the failure but controlled. I watched a Malayalam movie just to divert my mind, called ‘The great Indian kitchen’ as suggested by my sister. (she thinks I don’t take any responsibility for household stuff) anyways, It was a good movie. I thought after completing 100days here, I’ll write but somehow could not stop myself. One good thing that happened in my life, I don’t show my happiness/sadness to anyone including parents… While watching any movie unexpectedly any explicit content comes then I just allow that to forward or pass or skip by means of doing nothing but not involving my mind and self or play with my dick. since that is a danger zone. I keep reminding myself it’s not real.
Urges may come at any time. But I am not afraid of it anymore. You can name that’s due to mediation or self-consciousness or rewire_community guide. Everything I count. Something needs to figure out:
Social media addiction (Facebook, Instagram and whatsapp ) and organising tasks (January 2021 was taugher than I planned)
Well, I am not hard on myself now (I am allowed to use everything but not allowed to watch anything explicit or triggering content)
Note: I don’t get any triggering content in social media and I don’t give any attention anymore