I am an optimist. I can see a tiny ray of light even in the darkest nights. I move forward with truth & courage.
Today i am happy & content, i have completed day 1 of my new life.
Today i am successful, pure & clean. True to myself.
Today i have won over my urges, Living my life in the present moment, in my truth.
No more lies, no more fantasy, no more weakness. I Rise everyday with the strength to change my life for good.
My Today breeds my tomorrow.
Success breeds Success.
I did jogging and i found out my leg muscles. Time to work those in better shape. Eat my favourite food. watched my counter. Felt proud of myself. I like Little childrens. I feel safe in their company. Listened my audios. Relaxing. Playing mobile games. Watching Roland garros.
Around 6 a.m had a nightfall. Usualy i have nightfalls after 2 or 3 weeks. Although there is no fix frequency. I had one nightfall on 8th day but this is the earliest i have experienced till now on day 2 night. Streak is very pure from the beginning. No thoughts of sex. Dream world is a mystery to me. After body & i sleeps in night, God knows what is happening there.
I felt good after waking up. Felt my muscles a bit relaxed. Walked one round outside. Good feeling. Then i picked up a ugly fight with my elder brother. He was delaying my money from 3 days. He was not giving a proper explanation. I confronted him, today. In the end… he had to gave me my money. The whole family got involved in the mess and the roof was blown for an hour. My motive was just to ensure a good answer & assurity of my money. he was showing his power and a lack of brother respect towards me. I felt that he considers me nothing, like some insect definately not a worthy man. Well, i accept, Today i am a lesser Man. God is creating such circumstances again & again to wake me up !! I am pushed many times this year. I must join his hands & finaly Recover myself.
Feel sorry for your unpleasant experience…You’re right, just treat this as a training for your emotional strength. You may try to feel pity to your brother, who is still of low spirituality and suffering. You are meant to be different and you’ll face many adversities ahead, but every adversity trains you to become stronger. Just as you said yesterday, stay close with children! They have high spirituality and bring us joy and love. Wish you all the best and enjoy your journey!
Woke up with good energy. Roam outside in morning sun. Washed my bicycle which was biting dust for months. It was in very bad condition… spider webs, enginehari mud nest on grills, Rust on rims, tyres flat. After that i worked out, did some pullups.
When i do work, i eat,drink & sleep well. I made an indian fast food dish at home ( समोसा ) samosa. I learnt it from youtube. It was very tasty. My family enjoyed it. Today was great. A lot of progress. In evening there is a plan for watching Roland garross semifinal [ Rafa ] Just recently got emotionaly hurt. Actualy i am not learning from my experience. I gave a piece of advice to my young nephew who is 14 yrs old on whatsaapp. He replied rudly and in addition he said apply it on yourself.
Even if i get successful one day, i will never advice anyone.
My eyes opened in morning, there was a lot of noise, a family quarrel was going on. Soon i put on my clothes and got involved in it because it was an important matter to me. I lost my cool and start yelling. The little bit of the morning fresh energy got exhausted then & there. Postponed my workout. Due to bad mood was unable to eat breakfast.
I have to learn more & get a lot of control over my emotions, nerves. I have to become strong mentaly & physicaly.
Today again there was a family quarrel. Good thing was that i did my cardio workout. Today,My back got a spasm. It hurts even when i make a small movement. Looking forward to the Final of Roland garros in evening.
Woke up with Flat energy. Roam outside for some time in the sun. My back spasm is still hurting a little bit hence didnt did my workout. Feeling positive about the flat period. Let the healing begin.
Yesterday in evening i had rewiring experiences. Today again there was flat energy, i accept it. Roam outside and tried to face the environment. I did my chest & leg workout. Thank god, there was no family quarrel today. I am eating well and stay clean.
I am having sexual random thoughts at night before sleep & after i wake up.
Another Flat day. As usual i roamed outside get a control over my nerves. Did my biceps workout. Eat my food.
Today i am having past porn flashes. Urges are there. There is a craving for tasty food also. I think the brain is hungry for some dopamine.
Its been a difficult day. I messaged my companion and he advised to do good things and it helped.
Brother even I am also having the same condition these days…
Everything seems to be against me. As my exam result are so bad.
Nobody respects, everybody scolds,…like I am a bad boy eating for free here.
Also god really wants us to grow up and be mature and is definitely creating such circumstances.
Now it’s the final time to give away all the miseries and rise up like a beast.
Such situations generally forces to relapse thinking…to be free from all this stress and torture.
But no if God has created all such situations for us to grow up finally because we guys are born achieve greatness but flew off the tangent due to immaturity.
And if God wants us to grow we cannot run away from such circumstances…any how the final choice of ours is to grow…
Let’s join hand brother for no looking back, no more immature relapses, no get up late,no lazyness, no daydreaming…etc but only growing up in the shortest time to be our best version.
Sometimes Not every teacher has the talent to teach…not every knowledgefull person has the talent to spread the knowledge properly…
Don’t mind his words if you see his real intention is to see you rise and he wants to help you then he is your true friend… sometimes what love and kindness can’t do is done easily by anger and rudeness…
I think you should advice others when you become successful but after generating within you the talent of teaching…
There are many people with high streaks over 1000 day (no batch or rank for above 1000days is here) but we go and learn about celibacy to the person who teaches properly… whether he is above 1000 or at 0…
Becs we learn from him due his talent of imparting knowledge.
And as you said you’ll not advice anyone…what if other people successfully recovered from pmo do not advice us how would we know about the benefits and methods and all.
I think you should advice after becoming successful but it is a matter of future… currently we all should focus on becoming successful first…
Similar story of mine… Bad results and everyone taunts… I upset and frustrated with myself and urges played a trick to give them attention whenever I feel Low
After 3 days The Flatline is over.
Woke up with good energy. Utilised it nicely. Walked outside in sun & did my cardio. Legs are again bursting with power. Eat good food. Felt realy nice. Did the electricity work.
Yesterday was full of urges. I made indian pattis in evening & eat with family. In night listened to music, very relaxing. Sexual sensitivity has increased.
As usual same routine. Did my chest workout. Today when i was reading a post on this app, my dick got erect. My imagination power is back. After that the mind suggested to search for that video, i paused for a minute and gave it a thought. I concluded that if i have to go further, watching such stuff is a way back. Hence i took the right decision.
Days are not going smooth. Maybe it is necessary for my healing to pass such difficult times. Yesterday i tried making gulabjamun. I failed in this recipe but i tried well. Eating good and making right choices to make myself & my mom proud again.
Its getting colder now-a-days. Felt winter breezze in morning. Woke up with flat energy, urges, no motivation, social anxiety. Did my workout. Eat banana with milk. I am happy with my progress, in between there are signs of courage, rewiring, belief.
It is getting colder & colder. Early morning i switched off the fan. Cough, running nose. From today no sleep under fan. Prevention is better than cure.
Flat line continues…
Sometimes i find myself confident & full of courage. Ready to face the world. All the time the self respect is there. Like yeah ! I am pure.
Eating good. Ordered dry fruits for winter season. Today no workout. Rest day.
watched my counter. Felt proud of myself. I like Little childrens. I feel safe in their company. Listened my audios. Relaxing. Playing mobile games. Watching Roland garros.
