Hi, @The_EnlightenedOne
I am also struggling like you.I am so sorry about what you are going through.Life is not fair my friend.Only solution is that we have to make a bridge to cross the river of suffering.We must use same stones which are thrown to us to make that bridge.Like Sri Ram made a bridge.
I read this thread and I find you a hardworking man , like you studies for hours, preparing for CA exams etc.Also, you are tackling family problems.Trying to do nofap living in between the sick society, society whose only goal is to consume ,consume, consume.You are fighting many battles at once. I am really really inspired from you. Like I used to think only my life is hard but I was wrong.
If you are going through hell, keep going.This quote fits on you and somehow me too.
For last few months or since September, I progressed on some level.Best thing happened to me is that I quit youtube on 2nd september.Used to scroll YT from morning until I sleep.I destroyed my eyes due to screen addiction.Now, I only use for necessary how to videos and in browser.Quitting youtube helped me to reduce my negativity like I used to watch political videos so much.Also, I stopped getting news from any other source.Now, I live in my small world.Yes I feel lonely because I longer escape from my reality.I face my reality and live in a real world not in pixel world watching people shiting from their mouth on YouTube.
I no longer recharge my jio with 5G, I am 249/1GB plan since 2 months.
Relapsed many times in between but without ■■■■.
I am on Day 35 on 29 NOVEMBER 2024.
I worked hard for a job exam since February and cleared the exam.
I am at best physique of myself but still I am not that muscular.
My highest streaks : two 6 months plus streaks(around 190 days) , both before covid.After that I never reached 90 days.Recently I relapsed after 73 days.
I can say that only Nofap/Brahmacharya saved my life.I realized my potential only after not wasting my life force.
But I will say that I learnt about life also when I was in my lowest of life. I was severely addicted to PMO but same thing made me realize what I can achieve if I remove this burden and many other phycological burdens from my back.
I wish you achieve whatever you aspire to my friend.
I think I am elder than you and have few years more experience of life than you.Thats why I want to advice you that never share your sorrows with anyone as it reduces our motivation.Never seek sympathy from others.It may make you feel light for sometime but you won’t be able to use it as fuel.Also,start counting your blessings too.As always living in stressful mindset will cause you to burnout.
PS : If I don’t understand you correctly then I kindly apologize for this.