Ive decided to create a new Diary, because I’m unable to edit my post in the previous one, due to my original account being suspended, this diary will be so I can edit my post if I need to, this is where ill be posting for now on.
For those that don’t know who I am, here’s my info from my other diary:
Also feel free to read through my old diary.
Good luck jarjar
Day 4. It’s a slow process, but patience is a requirement to being successful.
Day 5. Just another normal day.
Day 6. I almost relapsed today, but I stopped myself going any further.
Day 8. I have been getting very strong urges ever since that close call I had a couple days back.
This year was a great start, I got to 26 days, but relapsed once on the 23 rd of January, but got back up and got through the rest of the month sober, this is an improvement, usually most months that I relapse are usually 3 to 4 times a month, an improvement I noticed is I only relapsed once this month. The final days of January were a little difficult, I had to convince myself not to give in.
Alot of good things have been happening to me lately, Ive been getting job offers and opportunities to do things in life, while it’s what ive wanted for so long, the only thing that has been holding me back this whole time is my PMO addiction.
Don’t worry bro, just don’t say no to new opportunities and keep the spirit up, as you adjust to your new hustle lifestyle things will start improving
Im surprised I haven’t fapped already.
Because nearly a week ago, I disabled my Blockers, I caught glimpses of sexual things, and was even on insta but I quickly stopped myself and closed it, usually I would have already relapsed when that happens, then in the days that followed, I got very strong urges, there was one point that they were so strong that I was going to relapse on purpose when I got home to start over, but there was something that made me change my mind and didn’t do it, I realized it wasn’t worth it, I got through the next few days without urges, then today I was at home, I still hadn’t enabled my Blockers again I had urges, I was feeling down and I had the opportunity to indulge in content and jerk off, but I didn’t, I did meditation instead, there were many times during the day that I could had given in, but I didn’t, I ended up watching nofap motivational videos instead, later in the day, I finally came to my senses and turned the blockers back on properly this time, I had been nearly a week without the Blockers turned on properly, but they are on and secure now. I’m surprised I haven’t relapsed yet, because usually within days of that happening I always relapse, but I haven’t this time, that must be a sign that something good is going to happen, ive just got to keep myself committed.
Yesterday I cut my own hair and I completely feel like a brand new person
I spent all of yesterday, because it was raining, watching manifest and because of that I wasn’t even worried about what day I was on, which is a good thing, because usually when I’m worried about what day im on constantly, then that’s when pressure is put on me. Counting days may be alright, but if you are constantly obsessing over what day you are on, and thinking about it 24/7, then im sorry you are going to struggle and quite possibly relapse if you are not careful, my advice is you can still know what day you are on, just don’t obsess over it, instead do something to keep yourself focused, so you stop thinking about the days 24/7.
Not a very good day today, I relapsed
There were many things leading up to it, the relapse had already begun well over a week ago, I had been acting out and it messed up my mindset, eventually I wanted to do it again, I would get urges but managed to hold on, but then today I caved in. I start again, but this time with a clean slate.
I can feel this, one peek and you are all in that relapse state, so avoid any intentional peeking, accidental triggers are fine (in movies or series you usually watch) but never search for anything triggering intentionally, it weakens our mind and we eventually cave in
Same here i m feeling urge from evening ,but i have to hold ,just few more minutes , just few , not this time ,one more day
Gave myself a haircut, I had grown it quite long to the point I could tie some of my hair back, it was starting to get too long though, and I was getting lots of headaches, I cut my hair and now I feel like a brand new person, I also feel like it will help me in my journey of nofap. I also tidied my room.
Im going to apply for a new job, I already filled out an application form and I’m going to write a CV(Resume) tomorrow.