I relapsed 2 days in a row. My mental capacity is shattered, my words are scrambled, and my confidence is rock bottom. I know what I have to do or what I have to stop doing but I am too weak.
You see, on Monday I take an exam and I’m procrastinating all day. At the end of the day, also due to procrastination, I end up masturbating. But well, then I am going to put the rules that I impose on myself to be able to endure the days.
-Do not uninstall BlockerX
-Do not see anything heroic -Meditate every day -Stay busy
-Plan the next day
-Control temptations and impulses
-Never go to the bathroom with the cell phone -Don’t waste time watching Youtube
Today I intend to arrive until Monday for my exam (3 days).
I’m dating a girl, and when I’m dating her and I’m on a relatively long nofap streak, I’m charismatic, caring, funny, and have a great time with her. When I relapse recently and go out with her, my mind is elsewhere, I am unable to enjoy myself, I am not witty, you can tell that I am not 100% because of the way I act.
Another issue, I am tired all the time from masturbation for at least 3 days after relapse this affects me in my studies, my projects and when exercising If you are reading this, please give it an upvote, knowing that there is someone who reads me may help me to end this addiction.
It’s been 24 hours since I last relapsed. i woke up with a slight headache, I wasted too much time watching videos and then I studied alone for 2 hours. Later I started playing CSGO and there I noticed a huge drop in performance, my reflexes were slow, my aim was poor and in general my performance was lousy. I also noticed that I get angry very easily, which is not the case if I have a relatively long nofap streak. Right now I feel very exhausted, I am unable to retain information and study, so I directly leave what I need to study for tomorrow. The good thing about today was that I did not have any urgency and I did my day relatively well. I will continue updating day by day as a commitment not to relapse again, wish me luck
I feel that hard, but with Call of Duty Mobile. I get so angry sometimes. Now I just log off before I get angry. Usually it’s because of urges and I’m tricking myself into going to watch soft pornography, but I just put the phone down and walked away. A game is not worth getting angry over. Also I feel you with the whole gf thing. I hate myself when I’m with her after recently relapsing… You look like you’re doing good man! Good luck man!!!
Agree with u man
Before relapse im egaer to speak to my gf about my day and want to know about her too and it makes the day complete
But relapse takes that enthusiasm away
I feel guilty while speaking to her
And also not interested to speak to her
Since I woke up I felt depressed, I didn’t feel like doing anything. Then out of the blue at about 6pm I was like “I’m the best” “I can do it” etc. I genuinely felt capable of achieving everything, I studied for hours and I think I have a good level for my exam tomorrow. To search for some information on the subject, the blocker blocked a page because it contained the word “tit” so I unblock it, and 2 hours later there you see me edging watching porn. I totally regret it, for the next time I promise to turn off the cell phone before doing it again. I went to sleep very late, I only slept 6 hours and I am at the beginning of day 3, I feel tired, my head hurts and I have a little fever. Wish me luck on my exam today
I gree with u
I too unblock when i feel like i need to research on something but i end up relapsing
The solution i found is no matter what im not removing the blocker not atleast for studies
Coz i do everything other than studies
And there are tons of other ways to research
I mean how did we research b4 unlimited data packs😁
Yes man one solution to this can be that when searching do not open incognito and fix the time that after this time i will keep my phone down no matter what. And while searching have someone around you so you won’t search something like that
Today the mental fog and the general feeling of malaise finally disappeared. Today I felt much more sure of myself, I went to the gym and gave it my all, advanced with a programming course and practiced playing the bass a bit. The only bad and good thing at the same time is that I had several stronger than usual erections and high libido, which led me to edging several times throughout the day without watching porn. I don’t feel bad at all. What do you think? Should I increase my alertness?
I didn’t update for a while because I didn’t notice any difference between days 4 and 7
I’m on the seventh day, I feel much better than the first 3 days after relapse, but throughout these days I must confess that I was watching porn of my own free will and edging. The consequences of that was that it drained a bit of my energy and time, I have less motivation, so today I decided that I am not going to edging or watch porn anymore, apart from being the main reasons for relapsing. Now I feel that I can do it, I am not in a moment of weakness nor do I feel dependent on porn, I am simply able to never enter a porn page again and that it does not represent a temptation for me
I was looking at porn for the last 3 days, I feel disappointed in myself but not that much because the worst consequences come when I ejaculate.
However, I noticed many symptoms, I have tics, my confidence is low, I only think about sex, I fall easily into temptations, I wasted the whole weekend procrastinating being that I could have studied or learned new things. I came to the conclusion that despite not having ejaculated, porn and edging does affect me, although not as strongly if I don’t ejaculate, being enough reason to make a serious attempt to quit definitively. That is why today I am announcing that I am going to start a challenge in which watching porn or edging is prohibited, it would be the first time that I do a public challenge in this forum and I would like the veterans who are reading me to give me a few tips on how manage challenges.
Thinking back I realize how temptations come, now that the classes are face-to-face, and it’s been a long time since I’ve been surrounded by such pretty girls who are my classmates, I live fantasizing about them, that means I can’t get out of the head emergencies. I know exactly what attracts me to women, I just have to avoid searching the internet to see those images.
When I spoke several posts ago about my experience with nofap and dating, well, I recently proved it, having a relatively long record, I am a totally different person than I am if I relapse.
Yea bro it’s hard and all u have to do is focus on UR work and maybe treat those girls as ur sisters. U can also try to imagine Buddha’s way (i will not tell here it’s kind of weird but it may work for u as it has worked for me sometimes, if u want to know dm me)