IGuardian's Diary "Steps of development"

Sergei 18. I am from Russia. If anyone wants to exchange codes, just email me. My code is n9vxwu. In this diary I will indicate all the changes that have happened to me. I will speak frankly about everything. I will be honest with myself and with you
a little about yourself
My experience is about 6 years. ±
Maximum abstinence time - 15 days
Now I have combined all my forces and I am sure that this time everything will turn out. I suspected that my best friend (in the past, a thin,stupid guy who didn’t want to do anything) had given up this habit(the arguments in this post are not important) , and IT was because of this business that he went uphill. For a couple of months he found a lot of new friends, became much more confident, gained 13 kg, he lost acne. I had a healthy competition,I have been doing sports for a long time,about 5 years,but he overtook me in terms of strength, and in weight very much, I can not allow him to change so,and I would have remained the same. So I’m going to test my addiction. Now I have a strong case to make. I weigh 60 kg and my weight has not changed in the last 4 years. (His weight, too, not changed until this year). If I gain weight or also get rid of acne ( I have a lot of them), then I will ask him? He had really renounced this sin and therefore, he became well or not.
I told you about my motivation. Perhaps you will not understand much because of my English,but nevertheless)))
Welcome,watch my changes…I…may the force be with you)

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31.03 (2)
Depression… I’m drawn to cheap pleasures

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1.04 (3 days)
I am very worried about the text that I need to learn and tell at the University

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2.04. (Day 4) I realized the truth: “The easier it is to live and the more you are adapted to the environment, the longer your life expectancy increases”

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3.04. (5) Nothing special,
my head ached. Mood 55/100 (50-normal average mood)

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4.04 (6 day) Mood - 63.
I begin to notice positive changes. High spirits,although perhaps it’s because of the good weather. Maybe it’s self-hypnosis.

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5.04 (7 day) All with steeply). Set a record for weight squats. I sat 70kg x1 times
General mood [59-60]

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6.04 (8 day) Usual mood,nothing write home about. Apparently while the body is being rebuilt. I try to talk about what really matters to me.

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7.04. (Day 9)
You know? I notice I can look at the girls more confidently. I’ve never looked them in the eye before. And if I saw their eyes,I immediately looked away, but now I can look longer. And sometimes even openly laugh if a stranger girl on the street doing some fun things. I look at them,they see me and my smile and start smiling too, they get embarrassed)
I also noticed that in 9 days I still have never came up with the idea of failure, and I have never caught myself on the fact that you want to do something obscene. To be honest,it’s alarming…

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from 9 to 12 days. Changeable mood. The feeling is ordinary,unremarkable. Sometimes I’m more calm than ever, and sometimes I’m anxious. To breakdown not pulling.even I had the feeling that I should not abstain

11.04. (Day 13) was withdrawal…

Tip: when strongly want to break, use cheap pleasures,but others. Buy something sweet, buy a drink, buy some new thing to himself. Just don’t abuse it. But it helps