Hi friends! I need help. I have been putting up this fight to continue with my streak on hard mode and thankfully I haven’t relapsed yet. But when I see guys with higher streak score than mine and they are relapsing one by one and going back to zero peasant level, that makes me doubt and gives me anxious thoughts that I too will lose my battle against masturbation and orgasm addiction and lose my streak. Some of you may say liberal things to me and ask me to go easy if I relapse but I’m seriously concerned and worried what if I relapse? And I don’t want that to happen at all cost. I don’t want to go back to zero after day 17 and above. I need some strict, practical, firm, almost a military general level advice from you, so that will stick in my mind and help me avoid relapse which I’m fearing it might like the rest. Perhaps your strict advice will take my fear and anxiety away. I don’t need soft words and sympathy. I need advice that are strong as steel. Period!
Yes man the only advice I have for you is to focus on something that is important to you and make sure you get to bed tired. I also have an app appblock that helps, it lets you block apps so I block browsers and YT and a friend of mine knows the passcode so I cannot just change the settings. That helped me a lot and I haven’t watch porn in a long while. That is some practical tips to make it easier.
No advice can guarantee success, it is you who chose not to fap, now it is upto you how you convice yourself not to fap or let your brain counter convince you. The urges will be so great(depending upon the extent of addiction) that you won’t be able to think any thing and in no time you will find yourself edging. All those plans and schedules will help you to stay away from fapping until they are followed properly the moment you deviated even a little bit it become a slippery slope.
The challenge here is to stop yourself from thinking anything lustful the moment it enters your brain… You see and feel numerous things all day long which can act as a trigger, it is a perpetual fight. Its like you are in a battlefield and enemies are going to come forever. You will lose if you get tired of fighting. I don’t know if the urges ever stop coming…
How much can you fight, how hungry are you to win over your desires. And again no advice guarantees sure shot success. The trick here is to be resilient, you try one thing, it doesn’t work then you must try something else.
Lastly, if you do something because you are afraid of failing then maybe you are winning over it but you are still afraid. Fear of failure is a negative motivation, which has its side effects.
Don’t think too much about it bro, do things which you need to do, achieve something everyday.
Brother, it happens to me all the time, But all I can say is, it proves all the more that how being complacent is dangerous, even a little bit. When our counter reaches a period of over 45 days or 60 days we get overconfident enough to make us watch normal erotic pics, movies. We must remember that it took over a period of atleast a year for most of us to get this much addicted to it. So, atleast it will take more than 200 days of no fap to start to feel normal again. Also, I think you should try to prove your fear wrong that, you are not like those that failed.
It’s just a fear bro, don’t pay any heed to it. I will pass just like those urges.
You want some solid advice? I’ll give you some.
I’m currently at the end of day 106, and I’ve been doing this nofap thing for almost 3 years, so whatever stage of recovery you’re in, I’ve probably been there. My first solid advice I will give you might be a little in your face, but here it is. Your brain is your enemy right now, and it is working against you. Why? As a result of being addicted to something so dopamine releasing as PMO, you’ve hijacked your reward system in your brain to THINK that you need this. It will sometimes even try to shut off the parts of your brain that help you resist temptation just because it thinks that relapsing is such a fundamental need. So basically you can’t give yourself any leeway with temptation. I’ve slept on my couch upstairs away from my room for over 3 months now, because I know my room has historically been a dangerous environment, and I cant assume I’ll be strong enough to resist when temptation comes.
You also need to not just live in fear for relapsing. Dwelling on relapsing will only make you relapse, its a simple fact. You need to have purpose, give your life to something, or someone. Set goals in life, whatever you gotta do. You have to ask yourself why you are doing this, and why you are changing your lifestyle this dramatically. If you don’t have an answer for that, then find it. These things take time. If you know your why, stick to it like your life depends on it. Because it does. But this is also your decision entirely, and your recovery can only be walked by you, because everyone is different. So, do the best you can, and you’ll make it